Thursday, July 22, 2010

The Starhawk Puts on a Tie

Yesterday’s The Starhawk decided the best way to impress Anne’s parents was to don the proverbial tie and bring her a bouquet of blowpops.

Do I smell an early favorite for next week’s HCwDB of the Week?

Perhaps. But I also smell a strange odor coming from my stained carpet.

Stupid grape jelly stains. If only grape jelly wasn’t so tasty on bagels.

# posted by douchebag1
7:24 am July, 22 Vin Douchal said...

Dammit, Starhawk, grab your Squire bass and get to rehearsal on time. Fuccen inbred.

7:26 am July, 22 RAPETIME said...

Oh good, now we have something to hang him with. I always hate it when I have to take the time to find a rope.

7:26 am July, 22 Vin Douchal said...

Anne looks like trouble. And by trouble I mean a drizzling of my personal recipe of cockk demi-glaze on thems perfect breasteses

7:27 am July, 22 bigphatnotadouche said...

Nice boobies on the semi-Asian Hott.

The Douche is full blown.

I know where I’d stick those candy canes.

7:33 am July, 22 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Fucle off Starship.

7:38 am July, 22 Amerigo Vesdouchey said...

Suddenly I have a taste for pad tai.

.

And by pad tai, I mean Anne’s tasty mounds of enchantment.

7:56 am July, 22 Doucherama said...

Quartasian Miley makes my pants all smiley

8:11 am July, 22 Army of Douche-ness said...

I love her

8:15 am July, 22 mr.reeve said...

Asain hottie and Asainbag all in one picture. Don’t forget to make that dentist appointment Starhawk.

8:33 am July, 22 scrotum pole said...

After years of success with four and five year olds, Jason figured he’d finally hit the jackpot when he lured the hot, Eighteen-year-old Caucasian-Asian into his van with nothing more than candy canes, lollipops and the promise of a puppy.

8:34 am July, 22 mr.reeve said...

DB1,

Next time you get hungry for a PB & J try this!

8:35 am July, 22 Eliza Douchecoo said...

It’s probably a strap-on, errrr clip-on.

8:37 am July, 22 Justin said...

If only that tie was actually a long stream of blood flowing from a botched emergency tracheotomy.

8:48 am July, 22 Deltus said...

She’s got the making of a kissy lips duck face, which saddens me, because when faced with boobs that perfect, you like to fantasize that the rest is perfect, too.

8:50 am July, 22 Deltus said...

She is so asian hott, the Jade Palace restaurant hires her to keep the take out food warm.

8:50 am July, 22 End the Haberdouchery said...

I want none of this picture. Except maybe the blowpops.

8:53 am July, 22 Wheezer said...

So which of them had his necklace up their ass that night?

.

.

.

OK, OK, it’s a gimme: it was Starhawk. His beads were hanging from his ass when he was found hanging from his closet with that tie…..and with “Kung Fu: Season 3” left in the DVD player.

.

Too much?

8:53 am July, 22 Deltus said...

She is so asian hott, she’s not allowed in downtown Tokyo between noon and 3 lest she melt the buildings.

8:54 am July, 22 Mr. White said...

@vin

He’d be ready to play, but his D string broke and he doesn’t know how to replace it. You’re going to have to help him out.

9:06 am July, 22 Douchble Helix said...

Nice cans.

9:07 am July, 22 Douchble Helix said...

There must be something in this: cock-asian.

You know, a white person with some eastern heritage. Or something. Fuck off.

9:15 am July, 22 dbBen said...

Cool bracelets dude.

9:15 am July, 22 Thorax Hammersmith said...

He wanted to play bass, but when he realised there was no B string, he just decided to play Ass instead.

.

.

{{crickets}}

9:21 am July, 22 creature said...

this turd could make me go all sadist german torture… now where’s my blowtorch, ramassrod & dental tools?

10:39 am July, 22 Medusa Oblongata said...

@ Creatch ^

Didn’t Mr. White return those yet? Pfffft. Fuccen men, you gotta tell ’em everything ten times….

.

@ Mr. Reeve 8:34

Where in the nine levels of hell did you find such a ghastly item? I think the manwich-looking on scares me the most. Good God, when it’s too much work to make a sandwich, society collapses.

.

She loses 20 points for the duckface and rosary. But she can earn them back by letting my play Tune In Tokyo with her.

10:55 am July, 22 Douchble Helix said...

Starhawk looks to be holding the same lollipop in his hand that the ptp in the original photo is holding in her hand.

hhmmm….I think I got an idea….

12:31 pm July, 22 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

I stand corrected. Yesterday I called StarHawk a hermaphrodite. I take it back. “He” is the result of asexual reproduction from the oozing juices of a lanced anal wart from Four Prong’s ass. At least that would explain the hair “style”, chin fung, and facial features. She just figured out what that smell was.

1:32 pm July, 22 douche bagel said...

she is so boinkable and he is so punchable

4:50 pm July, 22 Whoop-di-douche said...

Lemme see…Samurai Scrote wore ties….

4:52 pm July, 22 Whoop-di-douche said...

Lemme see…Samurai Scrote evoked Asian…

4:53 pm July, 22 Whoop-di-douche said...

Something about this douchebag reminds me of Fish Slap….perhaps that supreme confidence in the face of so much scrotery and accessory Hott….

4:54 pm July, 22 Whoop-di-douche said...

His candy is dandy, but to lick her is quicker.

5:01 pm July, 22 Whoop-di-douche said...

Hairstyle and wardrobe choices such as his might be construed as

a) androgynous

b) Mardi Gras beads with evening clothes

c) department store shoplifting in douche disguise

d) anal beads signalling

5:28 pm July, 22 Steve L. said...

she’s so Asian that, when asked to provide the line following「千山萬水總是情」during her Chinese poetry exam in high school, she wrote「多給一分行不行」.

… and that was the sound of a bad joke falling into Marianna’s Trench.

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