Thursday, July 1, 2010

The Tang

After weeks of pestering her in Bio II, The Tang finally won over Shoshanna Hottowitz by promising that the frat party would be “off the foshneezling.”

Shoshanna didn’t know what “foshneezling” meant. It couldn’t be Yiddish. The Tang barely spoke English as it was.

But Shoshanna was tired of dating Sheldon Epstein. And The Tang had a really bitchin’ Camaro.

# posted by douchebag1
7:29 am July, 1 mr.reeve said...

What’s up with the little legs on Tang? No squats this year Tangroid? Shoshanna is tasty and can play with my yamika holder anytime.

7:32 am July, 1 chaserofthehott said...

Ah the Camaro… gets them every time!

7:36 am July, 1 Vin Douchal said...

His wrist is king. King of self-love. He looks like he just ate a bad kreplach.

.

Shoshanna’s thick, thick hair makes me yearn to see how she shapes her pubes. Lovely rows of thick black heaven in a thatch design of her own making hi-lighting her mons pubis and the delights within….. she’s yummy

7:44 am July, 1 Anonymous said...

Dorf on Douching

http://i.ytimg.com/vi/GtR2kGBHEW8/0.jpg

7:45 am July, 1 Turdacious said...

Dorf on Douching

http://i.ytimg.com/vi/GtR2kGBHEW8/0.jpg

7:45 am July, 1 Anthony LaBaglia said...

Anon@7:44

Dorf was my first thought as well. WTF?

7:50 am July, 1 Turdacious said...

@ Labaglia

great minds think alike

or great bag mockers

7:53 am July, 1 Turdacious said...

i just have a faster index finger.

i tried finding dorf on bodybuilding but Timmy never did one of those

8:02 am July, 1 Scrotediddilyumptious said...

@ Vin 7:36

You painted a mental picture of her wonderful netherlands like Picasso. Makes me wonder deeper if she is shorn high and tight, maybe the ever popular runway, maybe the pre pubesent clean shave…….. uuhhhhh anyone have a kleenex?

8:14 am July, 1 Et Tu Douche? said...

A classic interpretation of HCWDB. Nice mounds but what’s up with the shorts/skirt pulled up to her mid section? I still bet she’s naughty though

8:31 am July, 1 Mr. Biggs said...

Yikes. Is that an illusion of the camera angle, or a cautionary tale of dwarfism of the legs from too much time at the weight room?

8:39 am July, 1 Jimmy said...

I don’t think she is Jewish, she looks more latin American of mostly European Spanish origin with some Moorish blood thrown in there. Toss in some indigenous Mexican or Northern South American genes and you get a nice hottie. Say what you want about the tenets of Empire building and colonialism but it certainly has produced some hot women.

8:44 am July, 1 ToddJerad said...

I would pour manischewitz all over Shoshanna’s body. The tang definitely has the right size smallness to pleasure her “out” hole since we all know she is still a “virgin”.

8:45 am July, 1 Deltus said...

I worry about The Tang. 75% of his mass is above the waist. No matter how you try to slice it, that shit ain’t right.

And Shoshanna definitely has some racial mix in there. And to all “racial purist” pudwhacks of all stripes, who think the various sub-species of homo sapiens should “stick to their own kind”, I say to you, “Dude, check out the uber-hottness like Shoshanna and Halle Berry and then tell me mixing up the gene pool isn’t a FANTASTIC thing.”

8:51 am July, 1 smackdouche said...

As a childhood victim of polio, Tang learned to wade into waist deep water at the beach and start flexing.

Shoshanna’s total hotness is less than the sum of her individual hot features.

9:00 am July, 1 soy bomb said...

Wow. Her rack is a delight.

10:49 am July, 1 Jacques Doucheteau said...

I found his dad.

http://www.houseofdeception.com/images/Midget%20Wrestler%20Fuzzy%20Cupid.jpg

11:38 am July, 1 douchie howser M.D. said...

Shoshanna for hall of hot!

11:44 am July, 1 massengill said...

He’s built like the knight piece on a chess board.

12:10 pm July, 1 Whoop-di-douche said...

I’m looking for his dachsund but it’s nowhere in sight.

12:11 pm July, 1 Whoop-di-douche said...

I don’t understand why he lacks short-arm syndrome. Maybe the Army got to him first.

12:14 pm July, 1 Whoop-di-douche said...

I never liked the taste of TANG and now I know why: it always left me feeling short.

12:16 pm July, 1 Douche B4 Dishonor said...

Tang has the body of the Joe Swanson character on Family Guy

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/2/20/Joe_Swanson.png

12:20 pm July, 1 Whoop-di-douche said...

General Mills went through a phase developing TANG when someone crossed the shortbread Bisquik formula with the TANG powder, and released a prototype mix.. Not every victim was identified or compensated at the time, and remnants of that early marketing goof-up still remain to this very day.

12:21 pm July, 1 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

This douche IS the real-life version of Stretch Armstrong. Or maybe he’s the first recipient of of leg transplants. From an 8 year old boy. That had muscular dystrophy.

.

Douches arms are so long he can tie his shoes standing up.

12:30 pm July, 1 ever present anonymous said...

What the hell is with that douche bags legs? He looks like Cotton Hill who had his knees shot off in WWII.

1:21 pm July, 1 Big Lizard said...

‘when I drive past the kids, they all spit and cuss.

because I’ve got a bitchin camaro and they have to ride the bus’

2:05 pm July, 1 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

I don’t know where you guys find these pics but I’m sitting in my office in tears laughing at the comments. Keep em coming boys.

2:15 pm July, 1 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Boss,

Maybe we should rename this douche “Forrest Dump”? Cause, you know, he looks like he just busted out of the leg braces and all. Just a thought.

3:19 pm July, 1 Dum Diddy Douche Douche said...

Is that the real life Johnny Bravo, 2010 version?????

7:52 pm July, 1 MC 900 Foot Douchebag said...

It would be so fitting if right after this picture he broke into song…

We represent the Lollipop Guild

The Lollipop Guild, the Lollipop Guild.

And in the name of the Lollipop Guild

We wish to welcome you to Munchkin Land

9:33 pm July, 1 Douchous O'Callahan said...

WHAT HAPPENED TO HIS LEGS??!

10:29 pm July, 1 creature said...

surely ‘foshneezling’ means i’ll play bongos on your tatas & rump while violently vomiting sloe gin & grenadine

5:46 am July, 2 Doucheblaster said...

Damnit! I really, really thought I would be the first to be clever enough to post a laugh at this douchebags funhouse mirror body and gawk at Shoshonna’s ripe pair of my favorite kosher candy- jewbies

10:56 am July, 2 uscrascal said...

damn, so f-ing hot…. i can’t handle it anymore.

11:45 am July, 2 Stephanie said...

He must a a whole whopping 5′ 6″ tall…he could get work as a oopa loompa

9:43 am July, 3 Steve L. said...

did Tang get the money for his Camaro by giving some major blowjobs to Stackhouse or the Gator. that’s the only rational explanation that i can think of.

10:02 am July, 3 Steve L. said...

damn you question marks.

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6:24 am July, 5 Tony Ventresca said...

Bing Crosby always said to photograph people downwards, since nobody looks good up-nose. However in this case the rule seems to have backfired and made this douche look like a Bruce Timm cartoon character (with apologies to Bruce Timm).

10:03 am July, 8 krissssssss :D said...

i love these 2 more than anything….hottest twin & ex bf haha <3

funny bc he's actually taller than me and im 5'9….it's called the angle or the camera loves…dont hate bc he's hotter than u…

and he's actually the sweetest guy in the world and twin is just gorgeous….

armsssssss so sex <3333333333333333333

mwaaa love uu

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