Friday, August 6, 2010
Neil Fung
Not since the early days of Crotchby, Soils, Rash and Fung has an oldbag this lame hit on the hottest wine taster at that cool downtown wine tasting event that never actually happens and doesn’t actually exist but you keep thinking to yourself, “if only I went to more wine tastings, perhaps I’d meet a girl who’s funny, quirky, and a magical pixie dreamgirl.”
Ugh! I need a pear stat!
You’re right. She’s a figment of our imagination.
The douchebags, however, are all too real.
And as for the obstensibly less-offense subfusc fratbag: reverse-mounted baseball cap= autoscrote (unless you are actually on a baseball team. in uniform. during a game. and you are the catcher. and actually wearing a catcher’s mask at that moment. In which case, you may be able to assert a presumption (rebuttable, to be sure) of notta.)
Vince Neil is out of jail?
Ben Kingsly, immersed in his next roll as “Sexy Douche”.
Meanwhile…Lawrence Taylor patiently waits behind old bag so he can try to tempt her tummy with the taste of crack and money.
As lovely as she is, it’ll take more than a baseball cap to conceal the leathery withered head of her vestigal twin growing goiter-style out of the back of her neck.
I think she has a dagger on a chain around her neck
use it and run, pixie dreamgirl!
Kudo’s Boss!!!, the Hotts have been HOTT this week, looking forward to some pear. Gene Simmons kind of, look a like, old bag makes me weep.
I’d like to remove that mole from his face with this.
.
And for his guyliner and ant farm, this.
Me thinks old Rocker bag is actually some old rocker bag that Pixie’s dad listened to back in the day and she thought it would be cool if she got a picture with him for her dad’s scrap book.
.
Are those hand guns on the blouse of the girl in pink? and if so why?
.
I would love to shake my pixie stick sugary goodness all over Pixies cleav
And for the hott, I’d use this.
I agree with Et Tu Douche? in that the hotts have been muy caliente this week.
And passed over by another chump I think has been here before, in the rear left it seems David Wright attended this soirée.
Over Pixie’s shoulder, is it… could it be… POO?? Who let him out of the closet?
Suite Judy Rimjobber.
Wooden Dicks.
Taintstock.
Almost Cut My Bald Spot.
Deja Pu.
Geritol Express.
Long Time Cumming.
Cinnamon Boy (behind hott)
Southern Douche.
Forgot to Teach Your Children.
He should take the hair growing out of his mole on his face,and braid it and put a bead in it. Rotten hippies.
i didn’t know that there are wine tasting events that only feature cooking sherry.
that being said, i don’t get wine or wine tastings in general.
Everybody was fung fu fighting
Those cats were fast as lighting
In fact it was a little bit frightning-hell yes!
But they fought with expert timing
There was fungy Billy Chinstrap And little Sammy Chong
He said: Here comes the big boss-where? where?
Let’s get it on
He took a vow and made a stand
Started swaying with the hand
Sudden motion made me skip
Now we’re into a brand new trip
She is hott, he’s a twat.
He’s a butt-roid licking dipshit, but the real tool is behind him in the backwards white baseball cap. Dollars for Donuts it’s a Yankees cap.
She’s a sweetie pie. I would cheerfully tongue punch her fart box. Medusa – that is a great idiom. I am stealing it FOREVAAAAAH.
K-Mart has gone to great lengths improving the quality of its Blue Light Specials lately, even going so far as to offering hot blondes in shoulder-draped black lace…but unfortunately, the clientele are the same, a cut above the People of Wal-Mart.com…
She reminds me of the porno princess Tiffany Mynx.
I assume their encounter went something like this:
“Hey you have the same eyeliner as me!”
“I just loooooveeee mac #5!”
“Me too! Lets take a picture together”
“Ok!”
“Then we can have sex!”
“Wait, your not gay?!?”
“No…”
“Get the hell away from me creep.”
When he got to the wine tasting the first thing out of his mouth was:
“Wait, were are all the boxes? They bottle this stuff?….”
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