Saturday, September 25, 2010

Donkey Douche is Old and Crimson


But, like the legendary ‘bag that Donkey Douche is, still able to pull the perky boobies.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. Douchebags rise and douchebags fall. But the legends carry on.

Until their early 40s. And then they move back home.

# posted by douchebag1
12:36 pm September, 25 soy bomb said...

Ronald McDonald is lookin’ hott these days.

1:02 pm September, 25 Fatness said...

Aw…the Donkster squeezed his RealDoll too tight and its airbags deployed…

1:06 pm September, 25 Wheezer said...

Damn, Donk’s still pulling that quality ass…..into the pic with him to make it look like that’s who wants him.
.
I wonder if anyone peed in that horse while he was behind bars?

1:21 pm September, 25 Douches Wild said...

El Donko Grande continues to thumb his nose at Father time, very inspiring

1:36 pm September, 25 MC 900 Foot Douchebag said...

I seriously look forward to reading this guy’s NY Times obituary.

1:39 pm September, 25 Wedgie said...

She needs more makeup and a boob job. He needs some industrial de-greaser. I can recommend Oil Eater; use their original formula. It’s good for heavy duty cleaning. IE: engine parts, tar, heavy adhesive and hall of scrote oily faces.

1:53 pm September, 25 creature said...

lookin’ more & more like an excon everyday mon! ‘cept really, really orange… & douchier

1:58 pm September, 25 creature said...

this cat makes Ian McShane look handsome…. & very, very pale

2:03 pm September, 25 Chris in 'Baghdad said...

good to see old Donk without bars in front of his face…

2:04 pm September, 25 Yankpud said...

Like the three-toed sloth of Central America, Donkey Douche never takes a shit. His excrement just oozes out of the pores of his skin continously.

2:15 pm September, 25 mr.reeve said...

Bleethe and the Beast

2:21 pm September, 25 Justin said...

I live on the 4th floor of my apartment building in Queens. Today, there was a repair man working on the toilet in the bathroom below mine. How did I know this? Because I was taking a glorious dump, a huuuuge and wonderful dump, and all the while I could hear the clanging and banging of tools against the pipes just below my feet. I thought to myself, too bad for my downstairs neighbor in 3d, to have to deal with toilet repairs while I can freely dump as I please. I stood up and admired the size of my creation, and with a hint of sadness I reached for the handle only to find out that they had shut off the water. With no warning! My toilet wouldn’t flush! The huge dump was here to stay, at least until these assholes turn the everything back on. I had to open every window in the place to keep from the smell from baking into everything I own. The poop wouldn’t go away!
.
.
.
Anyway, seeing this pic of Donkey Douche somehow reminded me of this story, but now I can’t remember why…oh well.

2:22 pm September, 25 system of douche said...

Nice to see Donk recycling his 13 year old sister’s shirt. Moobs need some help though.

Is there any section on her body that hasn’t been altered? I’m seeing a racoon that had woodchuck veneer procedures that got lost in Frank Ryan’s O.R.

They both need to huff some Speedi-Dri, stat.

2:24 pm September, 25 system of douche said...

Raccoon, moron.

2:28 pm September, 25 CBS said...

look at what cocaine does to these people!!

the blimping bleeth looks too much like a mashed up danny devito version of Carmen elektra for me to get too excited.

this dbag is ridiculous…5 years ago he looked 25…now he looks 45. how embarrassing and sad. seeing this is actually a little depressing.

i know getting high on coke makes these people fight off the compelling suicide urges. i look at the people featured on this site and am upset…but i genuinely feel bad for them. All the partying does nothing to solve the real problems they face on the inside. i suspect their stupidity is so gross they dont feel connected to nature and animals. i think that is the source of their problems.

db1 perhaps there should be a show to help these turds transform into real people instead of pathetic maquillaged mannequins and cardboard cutouts.

2:30 pm September, 25 CBS said...

they seem like aliens.

they are nothing like animals.

they scare me

3:05 pm September, 25 tall guy said...

I’ve made the comment before but I’ll make it again because sometimes a just assessment is the only valid remark: deep down these two are very shallow.

3:09 pm September, 25 scrotum pole said...

There is actually a product called “donkey douche” and it’s quite commonly used when raising livestock. We would use donkey douche if a horse, mule or cow had a yeast infection or otherwise had that “not-so-fresh” feeling.
It worked remarkably well, and had a very pleasant fragrance when used on sheep, not to mention improving their self-esteem.

3:24 pm September, 25 YabbaDabbaDouche said...

Ummmm.. those aren’t “perky” boobs DB1.
You’re a smart guy, but you’re really confused about boobs.

3:25 pm September, 25 tall guy said...

Also, Mr Sheffield is obviously paying The Nanny far too much if she can afford all that work.

3:34 pm September, 25 scrotum pole said...

There is an actual farm product called Bag Balm which when used as instructed, can neutralize Axe Body Spray, and may even fade tribal tats over time.
.
There weren’t no f@#kin’ douchebags walking around in Grandpa’s day when this shit was used extensiveley.

3:37 pm September, 25 scrotum pole said...

10 ounces of Douche whoop-ass.

3:44 pm September, 25 scrotum pole said...

Grandpa’ could spell better than me too. If he didn’t the teacher’d crack his hands with a hickory stick.

3:58 pm September, 25 scrotum pole said...

You know, Bag Balm was originally used in 1899 to soothe the chapped and aching utters of cows. (Never worked on my old lady.)

4:01 pm September, 25 scrotum pole said...

Sometimes here in the midwest, it gets so cold in January that the cows are udder failures.

4:22 pm September, 25 scrotum pole said...

I know I’m talking to myself, but my incoherrent ramblings are quite harmless.
.
.
Someday, when I’ve had a few bottles of Wild Turkey, I may unleash MY manifesto.
.
It will make the Italian Douches’ look like the innocent musings of Mr. Rodgers.
.
Let me just put it this way;
I know things about the metric system and it’s relationship with the Recreational Vehicle Industry that could get me in a lot of trouble.

4:23 pm September, 25 DarkSock said...

Damn…Donk’s actually banging a quasi-celebrity….she’s been around a while though:
34tyyt

4:26 pm September, 25 DarkSock said...

Damn, Scrotum Pole; mail me some of those tabs you’re taking…you trippen ballz son..W00t!!!!11!!

4:58 pm September, 25 Wheezer said...

Douchebags will begin eyeballing Bag Balm as if it’s a substitute for Preparation H.
.
Book it.

5:20 pm September, 25 scrotum pole said...

@ DarkSock,
Adderall, xanax, PBR, Ny-quil and half of my dog’s heartworm pill.
@ Wheezer,
That’s what I’m talkin’ about.

5:24 pm September, 25 Vegas Ass Kicker said...

This man is pullen tail with big ass titties and you talk shit about him? Fucken losers. Basement dwelling homos. All yalls!

5:27 pm September, 25 Vegas Ass Kicker said...

Yep, haters and no playas. That should be the name of this site. DB1, if you are the one runnen this site, thanks for the post of my sick ass words. Words that hit as hard as I do when I the bag. Bitches! All yalls! OUT!!!

5:37 pm September, 25 Fatness said...

Vegan Ass Licker…we know Donkey Douche. You are no Donkey Douche.
.
Pretty sure I just saw you outside Caesar’s Palace handing out those little hooker cards to the grannies passing by on their way to the early bird buffet at Paris. You really shouldn’t knock them down and steal their iPhones so you can post here…

7:13 pm September, 25 doucheywallnuts said...

At first glance it would seem that DD was scoring some prime pussay. However, he looks to be about 50 and she looks like she’s 20, and a bad 20. Boobs aside, she has the face of the Joker and is really not good looking, in any way. And besides. any prime bleeth doesn’t have the discount Asian turquoise nail job.
Thanks to the pharmaceutical industry that created Viagra and Cialis, and the decreasing expectation of females who posses limited intelligence and a credit line sufficient enough to pay for fake tits choads like Donkey Douche will continue to thrive. We should enjoy this phenomena until we reach third world status. Third world douchebags NEVER score mogambo..

7:22 pm September, 25 army (ret) douche said...

oh vegas ass pisser… is this your attempt to make it to the 2010 douchies? stackhouse is far more eloquant with his words. like so many instant win contests, please play again!

7:32 pm September, 25 Wheezer said...

Beggars’ Ass Picker: a self-proclaimed “game master” (my guess: World of Warcraft) who has to pop in here on a Saturday to check on us instead of going out and getting his dick smoked.
.
Well, the actual dick smoking comes later when mom’s pool boy Raul forces VAK’s head down and says, “You know ‘The Drill’…..”

7:35 pm September, 25 Stephanie said...

Donkey looks real angry – did someone pull his tail? And that woman should get back onto her broom and fly home.

7:44 pm September, 25 3D said...

Like Jane Goodall studying chimps, I was fortunate to spot Donkey Douche in his natural habitat…frolicing on North Ave Beach in Chicago. While perched high up above at Castaways (bar) I was able to capture this moment of Doucheity as he was setting up camp NOT down by the water, but where a predator stalks his prey…by the sidewalk where people have to walk past him so he can lure them in with his charm and Ed Hardy cologne.

Here is the fine specimen, complete with moon boots on in the sand.

http://tinypic.com/r/29lmtfc/7

7:44 pm September, 25 Douche Equis said...

If Venusian Ass Dicker stops back, I’m hoping to ask him to send in a few pix so we can, you know, mock and all that. VD, what say you?

7:53 pm September, 25 double bagger said...

What’s maquillaged mean? Nevermind, I don’t really want to know.

7:53 pm September, 25 CBS said...

“when i the bag” pffffttt…bahahhahahah.

ouchbag…way to chop your own dick off and have it rest in your mouth.

7:58 pm September, 25 CBS said...

it is a made up word…a play on the french word makeup. i feel it has many a trans connotations.

8:28 pm September, 25 Wedgie said...

Time to block that fool. He’s only been around for two days and I’m already sick of him. But I still love Las Vegas, ground zero for so many new antibiotics. It’s like a huge ope-air germ lab. Pfizer and Glaxo have clinics on the strip, just testing new shit out daily.
You go boy.

8:29 pm September, 25 Wedgie said...

“open air”. Illiterate asshat.

8:53 pm September, 25 dbBen said...

“I want to hear proposition.”

9:01 pm September, 25 Vin Douchal said...

@ 3D
.
Nice tag. This is what is referred to in studies at higher institutions of learning as a “Douchebag Sandbox“.
.
Unlike the “Douchebag Lunchbox” where a douchebag attempts cunilingus on a woman and ends up vomiting, the Sandbox is where the non-aquatic douchebag can hone his tan, semi-pose while squeezing their triceps against their ribcage and sucking in their gut, talk loudly with their fellow taint stains and either practice their frolic technique or stand woodenly fixed to the ground with unlaced boots of many varieties.
.
Sometimes the douchebag specimen produces an undersized football to toss around as they attempt to hold a red cup in the other hand. Awkward bending and arm angles usually leads to drunken toppling and vulgar language such as, “Dude, you throw like a girl” or “Fag, can’t you reach me in the air?” or”Shit fuckface, what the fucking fuck is wrong you?”
.
This is followed by distorted reminiscing about the glory days of high school sports a mere 12 years ago when their scrotum was not shriveled like prunes and they could formulate sentences without guffaws as punctuation.
.
In conclusion, do not attempt to converse with this species unless you are well versed in incoherent grunts and aggressive demonstrations of perceived superiorority

9:03 pm September, 25 Vin Douchal said...

Anyone watching this ASU v Oregon game? It’s a slugfest

9:20 pm September, 25 DarkSock said...

Oregon? Is that even a state?
.
.
.
All ’bout dem Saints t’marr, fooool.

9:27 pm September, 25 scaraface said...

chickies face is scaring me!!
well it would if i was looking at her face, luckily i’m staring at her giant over-inflated funbags

9:35 pm September, 25 Mr. White said...

Damn, prison life really put the miles on poor Donk’s face. I almost feel bad for him.
.
Not really.
.
She reminds me of Elvira…if Elvira had done meth and augmented her breasts with basketballs.

9:52 pm September, 25 DarkSock said...

And while I’ve been a great admirer of Matt Taibi’s excellent skewering of Wall Street in his excellent series of Rolling Stone articles over the last year, why does he continually slag Gulf Coast people? In this month’s RS, in his otherwise excellent treatise on BP and its finger on the detonator with the Global Economy, he refers to us down here on the Coast as “oil soaked hicks” and “NASCAR-loving plaintiffs”. DB1, I would humbly suggest Mr. Taibbi as honorary Douchebag of the Month for arrogantly shitting on hapless victims with the same prejudicial arrogance as the BP Boardmembers he rails against. Fuck you, Matt. I wonder how your fucking article would have been written had the black tar washed ashore in Real America areas such as Nantucket or, hell, even the Jersey Shore, instead of the “Flyover States”, as you elitist fuckknots call most of America that toils and supports and defends soft-hands such as your own balding self?
.
ae
.
asdf
.
Yeah, I’m pissed. And since Asshole wrote a book called “Spanking the Donkey”, it’s topical to this thread, so fuck you too.

10:14 pm September, 25 Crucial Head said...

Though I am normally a huge fan of scat porn, even I would have to support my colleague’s nomination of “Mr. Taibbi as honorary Douchebag of the Month for arrogantly shitting on hapless victims with the same prejudicial arrogance as the BP Boardmembers he rails against.”

10:25 pm September, 25 Douchble Helix said...

Great job with the Mad Magazine, Dark Sock.

I can’t believe that’s him 5 years apart. I wouldn’t call it the same guy. But, I’m sure you guys are sure. That’s good enough for me.

One point (well, 2) to correct, though. Those are real.

10:27 pm September, 25 Douchble Helix said...

And those are not whore fingernails.

10:37 pm September, 25 Douchble Helix said...

Here’s a tragic side-by-side:

http://img52.imageshack.us/img52/3010/combodonkeydouche795800.jpg

10:37 pm September, 25 Douchble Helix said...

Holy fuck! That’s the same broad!

11:27 pm September, 25 Vin Douchal said...

@ D Helix
.
What in fuck’s name hit her? She’s gone “Stage V, Beyond Bleeth” . That is a frightening transformation into hell and beyond

12:23 am September, 26 Chris in 'Baghdad said...

@ Mr. White…Elvira was my first impression also but I didn’t say anything. Someone should clue her that Halloween is NEXT month, tho the blue nails are a nice touch.

Also misread the headline…thought it said the Donk was Old and Editor of the HARVARD CRIMSON…which struck me as odd: always considered Donk to be a Yale man. Stackhouse is more in the Harvard vein.

Meanwhile jetlag continues to ravage my sleep sched. And Las Vegas Ass Pisser haunts my mid afternoon dreams.

12:27 am September, 26 DarkSock said...

@ D Helix
.
PLEASE tell me that’s not the same woman……..?
.
And that there’s love and peace at the end of the light-filled tunnel…..

12:38 am September, 26 Chris in 'Baghdad said...

RELAX guys…it is NOT the same woman…

The Ukrainian has a diminutive mouth and blue eyes. Elvira has dark eyes and a lemur looking mouth.

1:19 am September, 26 Chris in 'Baghdad said...

@ Dark Sock

Surely you have noticed by now that NYT is the Pravda of our era. Spewing commie tripe is their schtick.

And CT (southern CT in particular) is full of raise-my-taxes weenies. I would rather be in Mississippi than in Connecticut. Although right now I would rather be in Singapore, where the cocktail hour approaches. 🙂

7:14 am September, 26 massengill said...

Yet, he is still not a douche.

7:44 am September, 26 Turdacious said...

@Vegas ass licker
Your mom called, there was a recall at the hospital.
please report to the abortion factory

8:02 am September, 26 DarkSock said...

^ Sorry, Chris; I pulled my rant. Off topic, and futile. I’ll write a pointless letter to Rolling Stone and vent that way. I’m just very insulted.

8:06 am September, 26 Mr. White said...

@darksock
One minor correction: If oil soaked the Jersey Shore, nobody would notice. Ditto Connecticut. As a northeast denizen, I can confirm that Connecticut is just that place you have to drive through to get somewhere else.

8:10 am September, 26 Steve L. said...

one club outing with that girl and any douchebag would be ready to move back home.
unless we’re talking about the LEGENDS here.

9:21 am September, 26 collosus of choads said...

Donk on Bro.

9:21 am September, 26 collosus of choads said...

Donk on…

9:22 am September, 26 DarkSock said...

Poo Oyster Cult: “Donk Fear the Raper”

12:48 pm September, 26 DayGloGuido said...

Guy looks like he’s been busy cooking up in the meth lab since the last pics…busy until the lithium ammonia fireballed and turned this asinine clod of douchery the crimson turd colour he is now.

1:16 pm September, 26 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

I dunno who that borad is, Elvira, or whatever, but she has a mouth big enough to suck off a donkey.

1:17 pm September, 26 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Broad. Elvira. broad.
Not Borat, but come to think of it, close.

1:18 pm September, 26 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

The Donkster is now so red he ought to be intro’d to Crimson Ted. They can both go bury their noggins in someone else’s ass.

5:37 pm September, 26 Mr. Biggs said...

She looks like his sister. Note the similar noses.

5:37 pm September, 26 Mr. Biggs said...

And let’s not forget how he pulls the quality hott… By feeding them roofies. Isn’t that what landed him in jail?

6:57 pm September, 26 Medusa Oblongata said...

@ Creatch 1:58
I make no apologies for my very strange tastes in men. I’d let Ian McShane rail me eight ways from Sunday, provided he kept his Al Swearingen moustache, and cussed me out in his native British accent.
.
Too soon?
.
Who cares if it’s the same girl or not. They’re all vapid, soulless she-beasts who feed upon thoughtless compliments, low-grade sexual attentions and high-priced liquor. They’re all orange, blown-out, manicured vagina carts for troglodytes like Donk to jack themselves off with. Might as well be the same girl, because really, they are. *Takes a huge bite of the cake I made from scratch and gets back to watching Evil Dead 2*

8:54 pm September, 26 Wedgie said...

^Why redheads from Chicago rule the world. And she knows how to use a sawzall correctly, too.

1:48 am September, 27 soy bomb said...

^^: “She-Beasts” he he he.

*pops in “The Office Special”, laughs, cries, sleeps, calls in “sick” in a few hours.*

6:43 am September, 27 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

FYI: Donk’s criminal case is still active and awaiting a trial date in DuPage County. The wheels of justice move slowly, as does the Donk’s brain activity.

6:51 am September, 27 curbyourendouchiasm said...

Ahh, Medusa…your way with words is sublime. You started my Monday off right with ‘vagina carts for troglodytes’.

hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

7:34 am September, 27 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Mmmmmm.
.
Manicured vagina carts.
.
When a hand basket just isn’t big enough.

11:01 am September, 27 Anonymous said...

@DB1 Any idea who the woman in this picture is? She looks eerily like Playboy star Erika Jordan. Is it her? (I’m, uh… a fan.)

6:12 pm September, 27 Medusa Oblongata said...

I do what I can, my little ‘hunters. A reward for your ego strokes: The amazing tits of Federica Fontana. I’d be strokin’ out if I were sitting next to those things too, Vecchio!!!

10:54 pm September, 27 Wheezer said...

Medusa, thank you. Thank you. I’m strokin’ out right now.
.
Anyway, I’ll see your Federica Fontana boobies and raise myself…..errrrr, I mean, raise you with her bikini/ass pear clip.
.
Ya gotta have a quick trigger finger on the pause button, though. I intend to have carpal tunnel before I go to bed tonight/this morning.

12:23 pm September, 28 Medusa Oblongata said...

^ Huh? *fapfapfapfapfap*

2:55 am September, 29 flash menu said...

It takes a little-grease industry. I recommend Oil Eater, with its original formula. It is good for deep cleaning.

3:38 am October, 2 seo packages said...

I am seeing a racoon that had woodchuck veneer procedures that got lost in Frank Ryan’s O.R.

Leave a Reply

What is 6 + 4 ?
Please leave these two fields as-is:
IMPORTANT! To be able to proceed, you need to solve the following simple math (so we know that you are a human) :-)