Friday, September 17, 2010

Friday Haiku


Captain Cavepud flies!
Sharon lost a bet with Kate,
Must steal underoos.

Stan uses rent check,
Visits Las Vegas brothel,
Has to hitch hike home.

— Devon Wheatcakes

Texdouche disproves myth:
“All things in Texas are big.”
All hat, no cattle.

— Jeff Reed Towel Dispenser

Incredible Dolt
Busts out of his Hardy clothes
Forgot the sunblock

— Poultry Turd

Cowboy Zack gears up
Long, hard cattle drive ahead
Down stairs to the pool.

— Mr. Scrotato Head

As the summer wanes,
bugs begin dying, but douche
still molts the Axe layer.

— Wheezer

Montana cowboy,
Performs groin shave with sheep shears,
Shears off his weenus.

— scrotum pole

Midnight Cowboy Fail,
Big city dreams lost in the aether
The future is bleak

— Et Tu Douche?

# posted by douchebag1
7:07 am September, 17 Poultry Turd said...

Incredible Dolt
Busts out of his Hardy clothes
Forgot the sunblock

7:07 am September, 17 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

GSR Cowboy
Should be strangled with his cape.
To leave only Hott.

7:08 am September, 17 SonnyChibaChoad said...

Cavepud Choad Sports Spotty Shorts
Marginal Hott Inquires
How did I get here?

7:09 am September, 17 SonnyChibaChoad said...

Marginal Hott Inquires
Cavepud Choad Sports Spotty Shorts
How did I get here?

7:10 am September, 17 Wheezer said...

EA Sports undies,
“cowboy” hat over ‘danna;
hey, it’s in the shame.

7:10 am September, 17 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Hott has hidden star.
I’d like to tat her bum too.
And tat his face, “D”

7:11 am September, 17 Turdacious said...

Bildo trys on cloaking suit
Brenda see right through
Stiil had small penis

7:12 am September, 17 Turdacious said...

Spell check please on aisle 4

7:12 am September, 17 Devon Wheatcakes said...

Stan uses rent check,,
Visits Las Vegas brothel,
Has to hitch hike home.

7:13 am September, 17 Turdacious said...

Bildo trys on cloaking suit
Brenda sees right through
Still has small penis

7:13 am September, 17 Wheezer said...

Green towel as cape?
Drinkin’ too many Bud Lime’s;
stop with the trends, bro.

7:14 am September, 17 SonnyChibaChoad said...

SonnyChibaChoad
Can’t count for shit this morning
withdraws from haiku

7:14 am September, 17 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

He’s the space cowboy.
But some people call Maurice
the gangster of Douche.

7:15 am September, 17 Wheezer said...

I’m not feelin’ it.
Smiling dude doesn’t offend;
he’s just goofing off.

7:15 am September, 17 scrotum pole said...

Douche super heroe,
Thinks he can fly with that cape.
Please jump out window!

7:17 am September, 17 Wheezer said...

Wanna see ass pear!
Side view not bad, but blocked by
bottoms, rotation.

7:18 am September, 17 Pablo Picasshole said...

Ties towel around neck,
Walks into hotel bathroom,
Swings from shower rod.

7:19 am September, 17 Wheezer said...

More pics from bathroom;
the lighting’s better in there,
and it’s home for poo.

7:23 am September, 17 Wheezer said...

Name brand undie poke
means he could embrace the scrote;
just hard stage -1 now.

7:24 am September, 17 scrotum pole said...

Oh, give me a home,
Where the buffalo (beast) roam,
Skies….. smoggy all day.

7:25 am September, 17 Wheezer said...

Bikini hott thinks,
“Should I take off top, don cape?”
My answer: “Damn right!”

7:25 am September, 17 Wedgie said...

Oh my, the horror
Maybe Colonel Kurtz was right
Fuccen kill them all.

7:26 am September, 17 Wedgie said...

^What, too much anger?
It’s because I’m a hatter
Douchebags bother me.

7:26 am September, 17 DarkSock said...

Spice up bedroom time
With role playing; once tied up
He’ll be Butt Plug Man

7:26 am September, 17 Jeff Reed Towel Dispenser said...

Texdouche disproves myth:
“All things in Texas are big.”
All hat, no cattle.

7:28 am September, 17 Vin Douchal said...

Make believe cowboy
How we do it in Camden
Rides a bull named “Steve”

7:29 am September, 17 ballsack pike said...

Las Vegas hooker,
Thinks back to childhood,
“How’d it come to this?”

7:30 am September, 17 Vin Douchal said...

Kenny Chesney choad
Knows all Nickelback lyrics
Finger holds back barf

7:30 am September, 17 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Cause he’s a grinner
He’s a joker, he’s a big
fat…what…Douchebag? What?

7:30 am September, 17 DarkSock said...

It’s a bird! A plane!
A speedo loco motive
About to jump her

7:31 am September, 17 Wheezer said...

Pic taken at six?
Too soon to be so greased up.
It’s from yesterday?????

7:32 am September, 17 ballsack pike,re-dux said...

Las Vegas Hooker,
Reflects back on her childhood,
“How’d it come to this?”

7:32 am September, 17 DarkSock said...

Steve auditions for
W.W.F.;
But gets “WTF?”.

7:32 am September, 17 Vin Douchal said...

Overdone cowpoke
Stolen towel from ReHab
Makes scrote gods angry

7:33 am September, 17 Wheezer said...

As the summer wanes,
bugs begin dying, but douche
still molts the Axe layer.

7:33 am September, 17 DarkSock said...

Steve’s great solution
For his running backne sores:
Momma’s beach towel.

7:34 am September, 17 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

We’ve been here before
And all us haters agree
NO MORE BUD LITE LIME

7:34 am September, 17 scrotum pole said...

Cowboy tells hooker,
“Get along little doggie.”
Hooker buys daschund.

7:34 am September, 17 scrotum pole said...

^ I’ll be here all week.

7:35 am September, 17 Vin Douchal said...

Dixie Chicks concert
Alabama douche and Bleeth
Get tanked on Zima’s

7:35 am September, 17 Mayor McDouche said...

Lone Doucher smiles
Hi-Ho Sharon run pronto
Tonto weeps for us

7:36 am September, 17 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Hott sniffs her finger
God only knows where it’s been
Do I smell Prep-H?

7:37 am September, 17 Vin Douchal said...

Know why they’re smiling?
Both are keestering dildos
Shaped like Peter North

7:37 am September, 17 Wheezer said...

If I’d seen Brokeback,
I’d have a better line than:
“He just can’t quit poo.”

7:38 am September, 17 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Douche dressed for film role
in Gizzum, a bad remake.
And John Wayne vomits.

7:39 am September, 17 Vin Douchal said...

Warm day in Jersey
Does not stop this fey douchebag
From gay dress-up games

7:39 am September, 17 scrotum pole said...

Montana cowboy,
Performs groin shave with sheep shears,
Shears off his weenus.

7:40 am September, 17 Wheezer said...

If she bends over,
you’re still going home with just
a fistful of cockk.

7:41 am September, 17 Vin Douchal said...

“Mom, meet my boyfriend”
Parents grab kitchen knife set
Four dead, film at five

7:41 am September, 17 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Brett Michaels in the
Good, the Bad, and the Lobster.

Clint Eastwood implodes.

7:42 am September, 17 Wheezer said...

^^Vin, have weather girls
do that lead story; I’d move
to LA to watch.

7:43 am September, 17 Vin Douchal said...

Shy Bleeth with coy smile
Agrees to photo with Chad
Loses job Monday

7:43 am September, 17 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

If I went 8 secs
Riding her bareback, I’d set
Personal record.

7:43 am September, 17 The Fourth Horseman of the Douchepocalypse said...

With such a DoucheBag
Sharon ponders stealing cape
to fly home forever.

7:44 am September, 17 Condouchious said...

Douchey Cowboy brags:
“I don’t need a dang saddle!
I like it bareback!”

7:45 am September, 17 Wheezer said...

I mean these hotties;
note no uppercase letters!
Yeah, nice save, Wheezer…..

7:45 am September, 17 Vin Douchal said...

No mention of thighs
Looks like ’70’s era
Buff Schwarzenegger

7:47 am September, 17 Vin Douchal said...

Dude, it’s okay to
Borrow your mom’s sunglasses
But leave her hat home

7:48 am September, 17 scrotum pole said...

Porn star, Ream Autrey,
Fights lifelong battle with clap,
The “Stinging Cowboy.”

7:49 am September, 17 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Would you be surprised
If, on top of all this crap
He had clown shoes on?

7:51 am September, 17 mr.reeve said...

Cowboy wax a lot
Has been called a biant twat
Kimmy has ass

7:52 am September, 17 mr.reeve said...

Giant not biant!

7:54 am September, 17 mr.reeve said...

The new Broke Back Mountain
Starring Lance Suck Him Off Wells
Kimberly wants a HIV test

7:56 am September, 17 mr.reeve said...

Lance once tried out for
Role as a fluffer for gay porn
I don’t know why Kimmy stays

7:57 am September, 17 Condouchious said...

Jen asks Super Douche:
“Shouldn’t you go fight some crime?”
“After this Bud Lime!”

7:58 am September, 17 mr.reeve said...

Kimmy always knew she was
I gal pal to the queens of We Ho
Lance gets more sausage than Farmer John

7:58 am September, 17 Wheezer said...

Jon Bon’s a cowboy,
and on a “steel horse” he rides;
raided her sock drawer.

8:01 am September, 17 Wheezer said...

If Prep H really
shrinks hemorrhoidal tissue,
we shouldn’t see him.

8:01 am September, 17 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Cowboy Zack gears up
Long, hard cattle drive ahead
Down stairs to the pool.

8:06 am September, 17 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

She’d always been told
“They Grow ’em big in Texas”
Zack is from Des Moines.

8:06 am September, 17 Et Tu Douche? said...

Midnight Cowboy Fail,
Big city dreams lost in the aether
The future is bleak

8:06 am September, 17 Condouchious said...

Cowboy douche is sad,
Chose shorts over assless chaps,
Lost role in gay porn

8:06 am September, 17 Haiku Nazi said...

Ve must obey rules!
Breaking rules is verbotten!
No soup for you
Reed!

8:07 am September, 17 Wheezer said...

Chad heard “Cowboy Up!”
Kevin Millar retired; so
should douchebaggery.

8:08 am September, 17 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Roy’s horse was Trigger
The Lone Ranger rode Silver
He calls his “Kia”

8:13 am September, 17 End the Haberdouchery said...

New superhero
Vigilantly fights crime and
Spreads hepatitis.

8:14 am September, 17 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Capes are for flying
But If we threw him off ledge
I think he’d just bounce

8:14 am September, 17 paperorplastic said...

beach blanket dingo
his base tan not yet complete
richard petty weeps

8:16 am September, 17 mr.reeve said...

Why does this ‘bag
look like he has olive oil on?
Oh, that’s not olive oil

8:16 am September, 17 Wheezer said...

I understand the
cowboy hat affectation:
he wants to be bucked.

8:18 am September, 17 Et Tu Douche? said...

Hopalong Assidy.
Self esteem torn and frayed,
Sharon picks her teeth

8:18 am September, 17 mr.reeve said...

All lubed up and ready
For a night of gay bar hopping w/ Kimmy
Kimmy hopes for three way

8:22 am September, 17 Haiku Nazi said...

Myself eight oh six,
What I really meant to say,
No soup for you, Reeve!

8:31 am September, 17 Et Tu Douche? said...

Cowboy flunkie macks on hott,
Her regret self evident,
Faux giggle hides shame

8:37 am September, 17 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Mr. Reeve is off.
Counting with fingers and toes.
Too many Bud Limes?

9:08 am September, 17 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Only steers and queers
come from Texas. Amy knows
he is lacking horn.

9:10 am September, 17 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

“He’s put on hat and
cape. Will he also jump out
window for poontang?”

10:47 am September, 17 CBS said...

Hi Ho SilverPud
Mint Choco Panties got me
Beating that dead horse

6:57 pm September, 17 Stephanie said...

side of beef
shows all teeth
country bleeth

7:48 pm September, 17 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Eco-green caped-bag,
neither wrangler nor Super-
man. Nietzsche cringes.

7:54 pm September, 17 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

What’s this, a polka
dot contest? Gimme a bot-
tle of Spot Shot, NOW!

8:00 pm September, 17 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Those Michigan State
parties are so out-of-line
these days. Sparty’s douched.

8:08 pm September, 17 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Anne of Green Gables,
Bleethed in bikini with caped
douchebag at hand, grins.

9:07 pm September, 17 PharaohofDouches said...

Hear! Hear! Captain Super Douche deserves recognition and praise for being able to tie a towel in a knot.

8:28 am September, 18 Steve L. said...

Cape of Good Hope had
just become Cape of Douche. don’t
know what that means. fuck.

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