Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Marty asks Michelle “Yo, whatsup? What’s Your Major?”


Marty is an Average White Pud. Douche hair and shirt, but his heart isn’t really in it.

Michelle just broke up with Shane. Shane was a stage 3 douche who looked like Mister Liptatt.

So, really, Marty’s kind of an improvement.

Together, they stand awkwardly, and ask each other where they are from.

# posted by douchebag1
9:33 am September, 22 mr.reeve said...

Marty is the pudwack from Ghost Adventures on the Travel Channel.

9:34 am September, 22 Ben McC said...

Wait a sec… Isn’t that the guy from Ghost Adventures…

9:34 am September, 22 mr.reeve said...

And yes he is a giant ‘bag. My wife likes the show and from time to time I have watched it. He is such a dickhead. His name is Zak Bagans. Fitting isn’t it.

9:36 am September, 22 Vin Douchal said...

He’s a dork in an awkward situation. A “Dorkward Situation” ?

9:45 am September, 22 Ted Brogan said...

Is that his daughter?

9:47 am September, 22 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Clearly I don’t watch enough TV. However, if Michelle’s pants are as transparent as her shirt, I would gladly watch her until my eyeballs shriveled up like two frozen nipples and I had to use a turkey baster and Olestra to keep them from drying out altogether.

9:51 am September, 22 Eliza Douchecoo said...

My wife also likes that show and I’ve been subjected to watching it, that guy pisses me off, he’s such a dildo. Mr. Reeve I agree Bagans is a fitting name.

9:55 am September, 22 Eliza Douchecoo said...

If you haven’t seen the show, you should watch for a few minutes. It’ll make you want to cancel your cable subscription. But you won’t because then you’ll miss reruns of Charles in Charge and Mama’s Family, then you’ll really be pissed.

10:09 am September, 22 Wedgie said...

Maybe she is a ghost. The ghost of Bad Choices Past.

10:10 am September, 22 CBS said...

he’s a date raping alcoholic who compulsively lies about his career and his past. he can’t be trusted with other’s property and he doesn’t wash his hands after taking a shit. the police have been called to his house in the past for domestic violence reports against his mother. he is known in certain circle jerks as the futanari king. an amateur artist, he has spend many hours on the can doodling lewd incest porn scenes involving cess pools and outhouses. he is only average in his ability to hide these features of his personality. this man may end up being the next adolf hitler.

no? yeah…you’re right. he probably is quite average for a demidouche…some tranny porn, a lot of credit card debt and an uneven bed. and she’s cute in a slightly retarded kind of way…i suspect she has a really cute ass.

10:11 am September, 22 Mr. White said...

I don’t know much about fashion, but I suspect Michelle’s shirt is one that you’re supposed to layer over a tank top or some such thing.
.
And I applaud her initiative for not doing that. I’d give her even more points if she didn’t bother with the bra. And also got rid of the brah to her left.

10:13 am September, 22 CBS said...

well i guess i was off on this guy…appearances can be deceiving. turns out he has money and a lot of tranny porn

10:19 am September, 22 Medusa Oblongata said...

He looks very unhappy to be ‘bagging it up like that. I suspect he’d be more comfortable in something else.

10:22 am September, 22 michael said...

His shirt is pretty douchy, but other than that he’s not normal HCWDB caliber.

10:25 am September, 22 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

^ Should never click on links here with a full stomach. My fuccen IT dwpartemnt is starting to wonder why I need a new monitor every week.
.
This assfucck makes Paedobear and Jeffrey Jones look like Pete Townsend. Hold on…what?

10:26 am September, 22 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

It’s a good thing I can contact my IT dEpartmEnt by phone. Otherwise I’d be up shit creek.

10:27 am September, 22 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Hello douchebag. I have a collect call from a Mr. Hansen for you on line 2. Will you accept the charges?

10:27 am September, 22 Deltus said...

Michelle is one of those girls you both hope isn’t your neighbor, and hope is your neighbor. Hope she is because, damn. Hope she isn’t because just her being there is fodder for Mrs. Deltus to leave me.

10:28 am September, 22 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

This chick is so young I don’t think her parent have met yet.

10:28 am September, 22 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Can’t give the guy too hard of a time. From the looks of it, he’s putting forth his best effort at the Outback Steakhouse following an episode post-wrap party. However, the ghost of John Largeman, hovering just beyond the bar, is not amused.

10:31 am September, 22 Eliza Douchecoo said...

OK, I’m going to have to go ahead and disagree with whoever is saying this guy isn’t a douche. If you’ve seen him on TV you know for a fact he is douche. Look at his hair for god’s sake.

10:37 am September, 22 mr.reeve said...

John Largeman would rain down a shit storm of epic proportions on Marty’s gel filled hair just to sniff Michelle’s socks after her high school volleyball game.

10:46 am September, 22 smackdouche said...

Nothing like douching it up at Hooters! The girls are crazy for him there!!

10:47 am September, 22 scrotum pole said...

Fuccen Gumby thinks this dude’s hair sucks.

10:56 am September, 22 dbBen said...

Marty hasn’t been to a college class in 8 years. In two more the statute of limitations will be up and the collections department will finally stop harassing him. “Stupid developmental Math, why is it a prerequisite to everything.”

10:58 am September, 22 Crucial Head said...

I haven’t been able to comment much over the last month, but I thought I’d take a second out of another busy fuccen day to say that this is the guy from Ghost Adventures.
.
Thanks you and I hope to talk to you all soon.

11:01 am September, 22 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Crucial Head goes back to designing the new BP deep water oil platform, based on a lawn chair he originally created for Plinky’s Mom.
.
Architect whore.

11:02 am September, 22 Wedgie said...

Hey Crucial:

Do you think this could be the guy from Ghost Adventures?

11:07 am September, 22 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Too busy to comment, and apparently to read others’ comments, but not too busy to watch douchey shows on a D-tier cable network.
.
Tommorrow we should get an exciting update on Ramona’s nail biting run on “So You Think You can Handle a Taint Kick”

11:09 am September, 22 Et Tu Douche? said...

Glad to see that John Largeman hasn’t been forgotten,

11:10 am September, 22 Sack O Douche said...

Hey guys, this is the guy from Ghost Adventures and Holly for HoH!
Wait…..am I late to the party?

11:11 am September, 22 John Largeman said...

I think this is the guy from Ghost Adventures and Michelle can sit on my face anytime she wants.

11:16 am September, 22 Ghost Adventurebag Zack said...

Yes, it is me. I look good bitches. All you basement dwellers can eat my ass with a spoon and lick the dried up cum from Michelle’s gash from my weiner. F you! I am in sick shape and can kick some ass. Get some!

11:21 am September, 22 Eliza Douchecoo said...

^I’ve had some, it tasted like corn dogs.

11:22 am September, 22 Melvin Limerickdust said...

He also just started a new show called ‘Gross Adventures.’

11:25 am September, 22 sad karaoke robot said...

this guy needs a zap from my robot dick

11:26 am September, 22 sad karaoke robot said...

shit.. so much for anonymity

11:26 am September, 22 scrotum pole said...

Crucial Head,
Good to see you’re among the living. We were beginning to think that chain-smoking Marlboros finally got to you.
.
PS,
If you run into Lämp, remind him that even the garbage man shows up once a week.

11:26 am September, 22 Vin Douchal said...

Actually, this douchebag is dating down. His last girlfriend was this chick in the “18” shirt
.

11:28 am September, 22 Vin Douchal said...

Uh, this chick in the “18” shirt
.

11:28 am September, 22 Vin Douchal said...

Gah! fuck it

11:33 am September, 22 Eliza Douchecoo said...

Ugggh, I just found out the hard way what having a hot pocket and a 12 pack of Sierra Nevada for dinner the night before does to your colon.

11:35 am September, 22 Vin Douchal said...

Uh, this chick in the “18″ shirt

11:35 am September, 22 Vin Douchal said...

Good night, Cleveland ! I’ll be here all week !

11:44 am September, 22 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Vin’s chick in the 18 shirt will be highlighted in the next episode of “Ghost Adventures”.

11:52 am September, 22 Wheezer said...

http://www.h8torade.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/woman_bear_pig.jpg
.
When I actually learn to embed the pic in my post, I can dispense with this^^ nonsense.

12:07 pm September, 22 Captian Obvious said...

That’s the guy from Ghost Adventures. He is a total cockk hole.

12:24 pm September, 22 Wedgie said...

Hey Vin, is the chick in the 18 shirt a ghost? I can’t see her.

1:16 pm September, 22 system of a douche said...

Marty’ has just informed the photographer that if his mouth can’t take it, his “Heinie” can.

Michelle is just happy the short bus has arrived to collect the pupils from the “plywood paneling showhouse tour”.

2:21 pm September, 22 DarkSock said...

Whoa!
.
.
It’s Ghost Adventures guy!

3:13 pm September, 22 Stephanie said...

Is that a glittery silver t-shirt he’s wearing? God,why would a guy buy that and actually wear that? It should have a unicorn or my little pony on it it’s so bad.

8:00 pm September, 22 Steve L. said...

hey my house i haunted. you really need to visit my place, Marty. but don’t come until i’ve prepared a body bag for you.
wait did i say too much?

8:42 pm September, 22 Lil' Fartknocker said...

Mofucka’s a dead ringer for Corey Feldman.

5:47 am September, 23 Ghost Adventure Watcher said...

Hey it’s that dude from………………forget it!

6:25 am September, 23 Wheezer said...

I don’t watch Ghost Adventures, but I think this dude is on that show. Matt Stafford confirmed it was him.

10:59 am September, 23 Captain Scrote Sparrow said...

I feel that 2nd stage douche is more his speed, Michelle is definitely Hott Next Door Grade A+ caboose.

6:22 pm September, 23 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Ghost Adventures dude has hair that has clearly seen a ghost.
Hottie babe is literally a babe in arms. Has she seen her 16th birthday?
I doubt it.

6:17 am September, 27 apk said...

I was wondering when Douche Baggins would end up on this site.

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