Friday, October 8, 2010

Lauren and Rachel Choose Poorly at the Dartmouth Freshman Mixer

But, in their defense, Lauren’s had a thing for Top Gun glasses since she was six.

Actually, that’s no defense at all. Someone call their R.A.

# posted by douchebag1
11:15 am October, 8 Tony Ventresca said...

I wonder if Lauren enjoys acting out the washroom scene when Tom Skerritt talks to Tom Cruise after Goose’s death? If Lauren does, then I’m pretty certain he acts out the Tom Cruise role.

11:19 am October, 8 Wheezer said...

Rachel needs to change out of her diner waitress tops before she goes out partying. Maybe she should remove it right now.
.
That is all.

11:22 am October, 8 Redouche-Reooze-Repsycho said...

RRRRRachel and her sumptuous figure and Laura Ingalls purity for the win! Her trophy is being erected in my pants as we speak.
.
I have a better pearl necklace waiting for her, too.

11:35 am October, 8 Eliza Douchecoo said...

This guy just hasn’t learned a damn thing yet. Rule #1: Get the girls super drunk. With those tiny drinks it’s going to take forever to get them drunk so they’ll have sex with you. You will learn grasshopper, you will learn.

11:36 am October, 8 Eliza Douchecoo said...

“my Dad, like totally owns this dealership”….works every time.

11:40 am October, 8 Charles Ulysses Farley said...

Why do I get the feeling that monosyllabic grunts is the closest thing to communicating a thought this monkey diddler is capable of? Or I am giving him too much credit by assuming he is capable of thought?

11:40 am October, 8 Eliza Douchecoo said...

Weekend at Bernie’s 4, this one’s called, “Yep, Still Not Funny.”

11:42 am October, 8 The Goob the Bag and the Pudly said...

I was wrong yesterday– THIS is the remake of Weekend At Bernie’s. He could really be dead– they are clearly holding him up, and posing for the pic ironically.
.
I second Wheezer’s suggestion above. Rachel is going to haunt my dreams tonight.

11:44 am October, 8 Eliza Douchecoo said...

@the Goob^
I knew someone mentioned Weekend at Bernie’s the other day, guess it was you….couldn’t help but think WAB when I saw this pic…..kudos!

11:56 am October, 8 Vin Douchal said...

I’d shoot my gun while on top of Lauren any day. Rachel can help like when they mate horses, if she’d like. Jes’ sayin’

11:58 am October, 8 Eliza Douchecoo said...

“smile if you’re gettin’ laid tonight”

12:05 pm October, 8 C. Alice Hardon said...

This photo coujures up images of Weekend at Bernie’s.
.
The volleyball scene in Top Gun stimulates my butt cheeks.
.
Did I mention Weekend at Bernie’s?

12:08 pm October, 8 Ernest P said...

They are clearly dressed up for a play of some sort. Likely Grease or West Side Story.

I call performative leniency rule!

12:25 pm October, 8 Medusa Oblongata said...

@ Ernest P. ^
If by leniency, you mean me up to the greased elbow in both of those divine spongecakes above while doing the Riverdance on his crotch in golf cleats, then, yes, leniency granted.

12:42 pm October, 8 Dex said...

Somebody please tell Toby to take off the glasses and jacket and to stop making funny faces. He’s not a douchebag, and if he wants to be, he’ll have to do better than that. I will tolerate no half-assed attempts at douche. If something’s worth doing, it’s worth doing right. Now put down the pledges to Kappa Kappa Woo and get back to your computer. Your World of Warcraft guild is raiding Icecrown Citadel and they need some of your sweet Troll Mage action.

I’m calling him a nerd. A nerd in douche clothing.

Also I am deeply troubled that Lauren seems to have a receding hairline.

12:43 pm October, 8 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

This dumbass is too young and stupid to remember:
– The Fonz
– The original Terminator
– Marlon Brando (Cool, old, or fat version)
The Lords of Flatbush
.
TopGun is all he’s got. And that ain’t much.
.
.
.
Don’t tell him about Grease.

12:45 pm October, 8 DarkSock said...

Bitch Crutches – All the rage right now with the Platinum level trust fund douches.

12:46 pm October, 8 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Continuing with references to the 70’s and early 80’s, under those aviators he’s wearing a smaller pair of aviators.
.
Rest in peace, Robert Stack.

12:47 pm October, 8 The Goob the Bag and the Pudly said...

“Riverdance on his crotch in golf cleats”– holy schnikes! Nice imagery, Medusa! I may have to put on a cup before reading any more of your comments.
.
@Eliza, 11:44
Ha! I must have been typing right as you posted your WAB comment. This one is definitely more apropos to the film in terms of the pose, but that blond in the middle of the “Spot The Differences” pic yesterday looked a lot more dead.

12:47 pm October, 8 DarkSock said...

The Sorority Sisters smiled; their roofie suppository worked. Now…time for them to avenge the date rapes with a treble hook welded onto an electric mixer blade forced into the ol’ urethra.

12:52 pm October, 8 The Goob the Bag and the Pudly said...

@ Mr. Scrotato head, 12:43
.
I never did understand how the Fonz could pull in so much tang. He was maybe 5 foot 2, a preening, self-absorbed neanderthal, and had a nose as big as the entire Cunningham family.
.
Still, what kind of father rents out the room over his garage to a greasy thug with a reputation as the biggest pipe-layer in Wisconsin when his daughter is just about to hit puberty? Howard was a dumbass!

1:02 pm October, 8 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

@The Goob^
.
I agree. Arguably he was an incubator of the Grieco virus. Aand it wouldn’t surprise me if Howard had putting the wood to Joanie long before the Fonz showed up.

I believe at one point the Fonz actually moved out and spent a few years in Africa healing lion attack victims with a well placed bump of his fist, and purifying malaria infested bogs with his culture crossing “Aaaaaaaaaay!” But then he tried to a jump a rapaging Bull Elephant in rut while driving Idi Amin’s favorite scooter and simultaniously f*cking the shit out of his wife and it was all down hill from there.

1:03 pm October, 8 Nancy Dreuche said...

What was that one movie where those guys carried around that dead guy to get inheritance money? Well, this looks like that but with hot chicks and an idiot in aviators.

1:20 pm October, 8 mr.reeve said...

Jeremy Piven sure pulls the young tail.

1:23 pm October, 8 mr.reeve said...

Piven as a youngster.

1:40 pm October, 8 Wedgie said...

Maybe they’re just nursing students with some samples they collected from him. They sure are holding those little containers gingerly.
Regardless, he is a douchebag.
Or, as they say in China, he is sum dum douche.

2:25 pm October, 8 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Lovely blonde Lauren, you’re doin’ just fine.

Somebody send Rachel a Lady Grace bra catalogue and a Boston Proper clothing catalogue, pronto. I mean, just because it’s Oktoberfest, doesn’t mean ya have to dress up like a frumpy fraulein.

However, you both have my permission to stomp his head off while polka-ing and then pour a pitcher of brau on Herr Spektacles.

2:27 pm October, 8 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Wedgie, as he doesn’t look too bright, he might even be a dim sum douche.

Just sayin’.

2:41 pm October, 8 Deltus said...

Das Boobs. On both. Deltus likey.

3:40 pm October, 8 system of douche said...

John Cusak sure can pull tail.

4:01 pm October, 8 I R A Darth Aggie said...

Their RA? try parents: they don’t look to be a day over 16.

5:01 pm October, 8 Steve L. said...

if you think about the number of people who would pay Tom Cruise to quit acting, it makes sense.

7:55 pm October, 8 Stephanie said...

Bitch crutches, or flotation devices perhaps depending on where you’re standing.

9:28 pm October, 8 CBS said...

BARRFFFFFF!!!!!!

10:53 pm October, 8 CBS said...

tiesto is tied up in my basement right now. i’m heating up the end of a twisted out hangar. he thinks it’s going up his ass but i saw him lick his lips…so i’m going to burn them off.

10:59 pm October, 8 CBS said...

i’m your pusher man…

listen to this song and imagine disgusting mongrel human scum pressing up against each other in fully clothed sweat scrape orgy. then shoot yourself in the forehead…bc it doesn’t get any better. …this feces rules the planet we live on. its shove a cock down your throat music and everyone knows it and the majority love it…including almost all women. i mean seriously pin your legs behind your head and emulate sucking ur own cock…it gets no better than this. you’d be lucky for some salacious homo to enter your room and fist fuck you into an early grave. otherwise you are stuck here with a gay mayor, a baby raping closet queer supreme court and an ineffectual pinky finger anoose exploring president.. thats it. it doesnt get any better.

11:00 pm October, 8 CBS said...

rape yourself to death and happy thanksgiving canada.

1:37 am October, 9 Motorcycle Mirrors said...

I have the impression that the monosyllabic grunts are as close as possible to communicate a thought that monkey is able to Diddle

5:40 am October, 9 Turdacious said...

someone please hang the fly catcher back up

7:29 am October, 9 mr.reeve said...

Thanks for ruining my morning with that fucking BS, CBS. Jebus Cristo!

9:59 am October, 9 Blinded by the Shite said...

Tom Cruise after reaching OT IX and the brainwashing truly kicks in.
.
Lauren is 100% lickable, inside and out.

11:47 am October, 9 Just Sayin said...

for once, real sorority girls show up on this site.

11:16 pm October, 10 Captain Scrote Sparrow said...

Looks like the poster for “Weekend at Douchie’s”. Blonde Hott can prop my cadaver up anytime…

1:18 am October, 12 Douchetacular said...

can this pic be a case of “statutory douchebaggery”?

8:49 am October, 13 ew. said...

This photo was taken at a high school dance show aka these girls are seriously underage.
TAKE IT DOWN.
GET A LIFE.

12:13 pm October, 13 TRoller Durbey said...

HI CRESCENT

5:49 pm October, 16 dan daly said...

lol

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