Tuesday, October 12, 2010

The Philosophy of Max Smell

Lets face it. When it comes to the Philosophy of Max Smell, there are some things in life that just can’t be taught.

Like how you know that parking spot is coming if you just turn left on Doheney.

Or that no matter whether the Tuscans defeat the Spartans in the battle of the Fjords, or the Spartans defeat the Tuscans, Max Smell will still giggle at boobies.

# posted by douchebag1
11:28 am October, 12 Douchble Helix said...

Lotsa big boobies!

11:34 am October, 12 Douchey Lewis and the News said...

He’s not even that big of a douche. Yeah he’s a dip shit, but I’m not sure about a douche.

11:38 am October, 12 Justin said...

@DLandtheNews: Uhhhh…frosted tips? Shaved Chest? GSR? Jesus bling? Ginormous women’s glasses? If that’s not the stuff of douche, I’ve forgotten what is.

11:40 am October, 12 Fatness said...

He’s a notta…more likely a silicone salesman for Dow Corning. Those are his samples.
.
Yikes.
.
Left hott is the only normal one in that photo.

11:41 am October, 12 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Caption: “Bolt-ons and Bitch Tits.”

He’s auto, auto…

11:42 am October, 12 Fyodor Dostedouchesky said...

Is that Brooke Shields on the right

11:45 am October, 12 Vin Douchal said...

I do like right Hott’s style but the rest of this scene is nausea inducing.
.
Max is one drunken visit to the men’s room away from slipping on the wet poolside and cracking his dome on a cement trash barrel. That would be awesome to witness or induce

11:49 am October, 12 Baleen said...

Where’s the Vegas solar death ray when you need one?

11:49 am October, 12 Wheezer said...

Can you Smell what Max is cookin’? A berth in the Weekly, that’s what.
.
He’d be a shoo-in with but a smirk or a stupid tribal tatt. The certainty drops with how much he’s enjoying himself.

11:52 am October, 12 Redouche-Reooze-Repsycho said...

His torso looks like a brown paper sack stuffed with cottage cheese.
.
What’s the estimate on total cosmetic surgery costs for this pic– $250,000, $400,000?

11:59 am October, 12 Vin Douchal said...

I love when hot chicks wear high heels with bikinis.
.
What’s the male equivalent? Do I wear my Johnston & Murphy oxblood wingtips , honed to a mirror-like shine with my board shorts at the Mandalay Bay wave pool?

12:02 pm October, 12 The Goob the Bag and the Pudly said...

Six Bleeths and a saggy-bag. It’s demoralizing. I may have to leave work early to start drinking this photo out of my memory.

12:23 pm October, 12 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

It’s like you want to lust after these chicks, you really do, but there’s something wrong with each of them. No, “wrong” is too strong a term. There’s just something “not quite right” with each of them. Like, once the cameraman stopped taking pictures, brunette on the left hobbled off to massage her club foot leaving a trail of orange pus and curses, and the straw headed blonde next to her collapsed backwards onto the pool lounge and slipped out of her set of plastic legs revealing two scar covered stumps from a cotton gin incident in her youth, while the brunette in the middle pulled her bikini top up so that her two additional heads could breath more easily.
.
Something like that.

12:24 pm October, 12 UFO Destroyers said...

So, did Billy Ray tell Miley (on far left) that this would get her career moving towards the adult genre?

12:36 pm October, 12 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I like sluts and vestigial tails. He just needs 25mg of hydrochlorothiazide twice a day and his water retention problem will cease. His BP will go down too.Unless he’s chasing the Goose with the Bull or an ‘Ade in which case he may need to be tested for an electrolyte imbalance like the one Greeney has in her chesticles.

His BP in this picture is 220/douche.

12:48 pm October, 12 Turdacious said...

Not bad for a guy that has a gutter over his belly button

12:57 pm October, 12 boatbutter said...

At least it appears Kaylie has come to her senses and gone to the delousing chamber.

12:58 pm October, 12 system of douche said...

It’s ok, Max, you can put all of your fingers on Pink Bikini’s hip, who, by the way, seems to be packing something.

1:00 pm October, 12 system of douche said...

Pink Bikini’s tits are so spread out they are in different time zones.

1:04 pm October, 12 Turdacious said...

Goldie blonde on the end might be a Malaysian shemale, not that I would know what one would look like, I’m just sayin that…hmmm ok, forget it

1:07 pm October, 12 Turdacious said...

@ vin 11:59
picture in my head has me LMAO!
and all true

1:10 pm October, 12 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Tony Orlando and Prawns.

1:14 pm October, 12 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Don Wrinkles.

Wayne Tootin.

Garth Schnooks.

Frank Sinatra Poonior.

Engelbert Sneekaskank.

Bob Poohart.

Cirque de Olay.

1:17 pm October, 12 Medusa Oblongata said...

@ Vin 11:59
With black knee socks. God damn, that’s making me horny.
.
Apparently the sternum is now a deadly weapon. ‘Cause Pink Bikini’s implants are both trying to get away from it.

1:18 pm October, 12 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Goldie is holding her breath to keep those things pumped up and to avoid Max’s buffet remnants.

1:21 pm October, 12 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I didn’t think the red sludge had left Hangary yet.

1:22 pm October, 12 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

^fucc

1:23 pm October, 12 Nancy Dreuche said...

I don’t care if it’s before or after Labor Day, the white shorts have to go. Along with Bitch-tits McGee who is currently occupying them. He’s gotta be an alternate judge at the Miss Pooniverse contest or else these chicks wouldn’t be within ten feet of him.

1:26 pm October, 12 Captain Scrote Sparrow said...

Very nice collection of plastic washed up on the beach there… Time to go Bleething!

1:33 pm October, 12 Captain Scrote Sparrow said...

I invite all (sans Sir Smell) to my bed to eat some crackers!

1:39 pm October, 12 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

His torso wouldn’t look like an Iron-Man mask if he worked out more than just the one ab muscle.

2:45 pm October, 12 DarkSock said...

You know that desk toy where you drop the steel ball on a string and it makes the others clack back and forth? We’d have the boobie version of that here if Ass Belch weren’t in the dead middle…

3:00 pm October, 12 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Is Max Smell the Earl Scheib of low-cost bolt-on jobbers? “For only $99 I can get you in a set of bolt-ons and have you up and in the club that very same night!”

3:01 pm October, 12 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

@ Darksock 2:45
.
Those toys are known as Newton’s balls. Yeah, Newton was one badass MF’er. But not as bad a badass as Mr. White.

3:49 pm October, 12 Wedgie said...

It’s a Jeopardy question:

When do six chicks equal 13 boobs?

4:50 pm October, 12 I R A Darth Aggie said...

This. Is. SPARTA! *kicks Max in the nutsack and falls into the pool*
Come on, ladies, lets blow this pop stand.

5:40 pm October, 12 The Dude said...

omg, some of those tits look gloriously heavy.

7:12 pm October, 12 Charles Ulysses Farley said...

So this is what the gals from Bob’s Classy Lady do during their time off? Hang out at the pool with a sagging gay bag while trying to recruit Ginger on the left to join the “Fun Bag Posse”.

7:14 pm October, 12 Bigphatnotadouche said...

from left to right: porn star in training, porn star, director, fluffer, porn star, retired porn star

8:47 pm October, 12 tall guy said...

This joker is pissing me off. What is it with him? Fuck, what a douche.

9:40 pm October, 12 Steve L. said...

some philosophers get whipped around by a piece of ass (such as and especially Raphael Enthoven). but some philosophers, like Max Smell, gets to whip multiple pieces of ass around.
.
what does this all mean?
.
well, Raphael Enthoven is a douchebag, no doubt. but Max Smell REALLY needs to be electrocuted. the smell of charred douche will surely smell better than Max Smell.

9:42 pm October, 12 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Holymarymotherofrainbowbowlingballs, I thought I was lookin’ at a lineup in the gutter for a moment. Amazon hott on the far right is THE decent broad in the batch. Hard to believe a Bleeth can be classy but she pulls it off.
Max Smell likely has the requisite three holes in the ball, er, uh, head.
Wait. Little head.

6:00 am October, 13 Wedgie said...

Milfy milf to his right (our left) is in the other pic; she should have left the sunglasses on. Now the memory is ruined. Nice move, bubbles.

11:42 am October, 13 mojowrkn said...

Max was happy with his AVN awards VIP package. He had to charge up his discovery card but man look at this pic.

Far left=Tranny!

2:46 pm October, 13 Blinded by the Shite said...

There’re those boobs again; pity about the gut though Max!

4:13 pm October, 14 pumpkinlover said...

Shouldn’t there be at least TWO hairy legs in this pic???

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