Wednesday, October 6, 2010

The Dripster

Because hair like that is an abstract conceptual prank that rewrites history on some achronological mythical level.

Like realizing that Bob Dylan’s entire career was actually played by Sacha Baron Cohen on the Capricorn One sound stage.

Poor, poor Molly. She hasn’t heard of Bob Dylan or seen Capricorn One. But she did see Borat.

# posted by douchebag1
9:28 am October, 6 DarkSock said...

“Is that a dead squid on your bald spot or are you happy to see me?”

9:29 am October, 6 DarkSock said...

He’s Four-prong, before he started main-lining Viagra into his scalp.

9:30 am October, 6 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

Does her tattoo say “I’m nasty” ? Yeah, I think I’d take a pass on hittin that, douchebag. Drink up those Fosters.

9:31 am October, 6 Et Tu Douche? said...

My dream of one day holding Molly in my arm and making romance explosion on her stomach just went south as di my penis as I realized she probably has had way too many based on the I am nasty tat on said stomach. Also the part in her hairdo is atrocious as is the pud in his semi catatonic state.

9:32 am October, 6 collosus of choads said...

strewth!

9:32 am October, 6 DarkSock said...

Molly only dates guys with crenulated foreheads.**
asdfff
.
.
.
**On their real heads.

9:38 am October, 6 Mr. White said...

I think her tat says, “Close enough.”

9:38 am October, 6 Mr. White said...

I think her tat says, “Pee here.”

9:39 am October, 6 Mr. White said...

I think her tat says, “Don’t step.”

And don’t tell me I’m posting too fast, SLAPWHOAR SERVER.

9:41 am October, 6 DarkSock said...

I think her tat says, “I Am Nasty.”
.
Duly noted.

9:43 am October, 6 DarkSock said...

Cracking a Foster’s to celebrate hot-gluing mattresses onto their ceiling, Molly and TurdThong Ted then limbered up in preparation for a round of indoor trampoline sex.

9:52 am October, 6 Vin Douchal said...

These two maggot infested fecal remains are tipping the Disgusto-Meter into the red

9:59 am October, 6 Crucial Head said...

Fosters: It’s Australian for Queer.

10:05 am October, 6 Crucial Head said...

The set of the upcoming hit: Ali Baba and the Forty Queefs.

10:07 am October, 6 DarkSock said...

Mark would eventually have to dye his hair deep red before his “Maker’s Mark” nickname stuck.

10:08 am October, 6 Crucial Head said...

I now have a boner… brb.

10:14 am October, 6 massengill said...

If these two are Aussies, they’re definitely bogan.

10:14 am October, 6 Wedgie said...

The lyrics to “Blowin’ In The Wind” will never sound quite the same after seeing this.

10:17 am October, 6 massengill said...

I think the top part says “Ian” or possibly “Jan.” The bottom half does say “nasty” though. The belly chain says “A2M.”

10:17 am October, 6 Captain Scrote Sparrow said...

Her tattoo says “96 PSI”, belly button bling air valve is for easy access………

10:27 am October, 6 JvS said...

She goes by the moniker of Chloe Mafia and she’s available for hire…

http://www.newsoftheworld.co.uk/showbiz/xfactor/979460/Chloe-Mafia-hooker-video-proof-X-Factor-girl-charges-for-sex.html

10:33 am October, 6 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Her tatt looks like it says “I R skanky”. At least it does to me.

10:33 am October, 6 Mr. White said...

Based on JvS’s link, I now think her tat says, “Place money here.”

10:34 am October, 6 Mr. White said...

Or, “Simon, if your forehead is pressed here, you have to put me on X Factor.”
.
I know it doesn’t look that long, but I have it on good authority that most of it is hidden by spooge.

10:35 am October, 6 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Damn you to hell DarkSock! I had a mattress on the ceiling joke all lined up (stoopid fuccken work interfering with my fun goddamn it!) but it is all for naught. Shit, back to the drawing board…

10:36 am October, 6 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Maybe her tatt says “Collect change from slot and have a nice day”?

10:37 am October, 6 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

They look like brothers. Really, really ugly brothers.

10:37 am October, 6 system of douche said...

After submerging his head neck deep in Chloe’s twat, the Dripster slicked down and popped a couple of cold Fosters to celebrate the acheivement.

10:38 am October, 6 I R A Darth Aggie said...

Poor Molly, indeed. She looks vaguely familiar. Has she graced the pages of this fine website?

10:39 am October, 6 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

How did they get the disco ball to stick on the mattress? Oh wait, never mind.

10:42 am October, 6 system of douche said...

By the miracle of modern photography, we are able to observe a liquid bomb seconds before it’s impact and subsequent explosion.

10:43 am October, 6 system of douche said...

@10:37. It’s “achievement”, fuckkstick.

10:51 am October, 6 Dex said...

I haven’t seen trash that repulsive since working a job collecting the garbage from the health center at Arizona State. Fun fact, the building also housed a secret storage room where they kept the severed heads of all those beheaded immigrants Jan Brewer was talking about.

10:53 am October, 6 Charles Ulysses Farley said...

If this ass rabbit can afford the £250/hour that this walking STD clinic charges, I’ll eat rancid badger meat out of Plinky’s mom’s queef factory.

10:54 am October, 6 Eliza Douchecoo said...

She does have a nice stomach though, I try to find the goodness in people. Especially 18 year old sluts.

11:08 am October, 6 jonezy said...

Everyone knows Capricorn One was OJs best performance until Police Squad. I guess his performance of not fitting that hand into the glove is probably his best performance actually.

11:14 am October, 6 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Ian Pasty? If that’s Ian then yes, yes he is.

11:18 am October, 6 Medusa Oblongata said...

DarkSock 10:07 FTW

11:20 am October, 6 Medusa Oblongata said...

Good thing “Nasty” is tattooed above her pussy. That’s the 21st century version of a Mr. Yuk sticker.

11:33 am October, 6 Medusa Oblongata said...

Not only is she nasty, she’s cheap. How much did that tattoo cost, exactly? I wish like hell I had a reaction-cam at the shop to capture these dolts’ faces when they tell me what they want and I tell them how much. They’re wearing 200 dollar sneakers and they think anything over 100 dollars is an absurd price to pay for something that will be embedded in their flesh for the rest of their stinking, pathetic lives. I promise you, she went in, hoping for curly filigree lettering, with diamonds on it and a sexy pair of juicy red lips. Dude told her it was gonna be 350. She made a face like this and then said, “What can I get for about 90 dollars?” Dumb slag. When that runny slit dries up and is oozing cheese into your Depends while you rot in a bed in the nursing home, the orderly in charge of cleaning your bed sores is gonna look at that tattoo and say, “No shit, Granny.”

11:49 am October, 6 Redouche-Reooze-Repsycho said...

@ Eliza Douchecoo, 10:54,

I try to put my goodness in people like 18-year-old sluts!
.
.
.
.
But I fail to.

11:50 am October, 6 Redouche-Reooze-Repsycho said...

He looks catatonic. I think she roofied him.
.
Also, his eyebrows are abbreviated. Dude, get help!

11:50 am October, 6 Mr. Biggs said...

LOL. Yeah, figuring out what inspired him to make this “bang drip” would take a masters thesis ethnography.

Medusa, hate to say it, but I’ll take her. I’d teach her a proper ethnography of American counter-culture.

12:04 pm October, 6 tall guy said...

Oh, they’re drinking Fosters. Stupidity levels just raised dramatically.

12:30 pm October, 6 skrag2112 said...

Looking at these two, I now know what Dylan meant by “Idiot Wind”.

12:39 pm October, 6 Nancy Dreuche said...

That little guy dangling off of her neck has got the right idea, after hanging with these two. Next time hang yourself from the mini-discoball, mini-dude.

12:43 pm October, 6 Boner said...

Corky’s mind is blank again. That empty headed stare and stupid do it yourself haircut gives away his barely 34 IQ

12:48 pm October, 6 Borat said...

They look like gypsies. Get away gypsy

12:55 pm October, 6 dark-drums said...

gel prong and yocal hot

12:56 pm October, 6 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Molly doesn’t know Foster’s is Australian for Beer or that her boyfriend is an example of douche.

2:03 pm October, 6 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Also his glazed look is due to the hair products that have run down his forehead and seeped into his ocular cavities.

12:49 am October, 7 Steve L. said...

@ JvS 10:27 AM,
Britain has exceeded expectations with that bimbo there.

12:54 am October, 7 Steve L. said...

then again it’s Yorkshire. if there’s anywhere in Britain that’s angling for the highly coveted title of “Capital of the Craziest Sluts in Britain”, Yorkshire would be right up there.
.
and that is what little i know about Britain.

4:21 am October, 7 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

As a person with hog-farming interests (and some investments) I much prefer the Yorkshire sows crossbred with the Spotted boars, and vice versa.

I’ve yet to see a head coat coloring like that of the douchebag, who at first thought I deemed might have been mocking such piggling out in his own mind.

Because it does occur to me that at times we are mocking the original mockers.

Such mocky-mock is disturbing. Highly so.

11:25 am October, 10 douche larue said...

Fosters..Australian for Douche

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