Friday, January 7, 2011

Friday Haiku

Water Pistol Pete,
Discount DJ in Des Moines,
mocks God’s boobie pride.

Wannabe DJ,
Grabs pistol to rob a bank,
A sperm bank that is

— Condouchious

Abomination
Offensive in the Lord’s sight:
Birds drop from the sky.

— Jeff Reed Towel Dispenser

DJ Hep-C Screen:
“Death to King Douchuous IV!”
God save her tatas

— Blinded by the Shite

Blue/white striped boobies
look like shiny wax fruit; I’ll
bet they jiggle less.

— Wheezer

Asian boob gal says:
“See my chest, see my chest, please!”
DJ Scene, not heard

— saulgoode42

Vanilla Ice Scrote –
Squirt Gun does not compensate
for your small package

— dknutty

Vanilla Lice sneers
Displaying the twin horrors:
Chest shave/treasure trail.

— Redouche-Reooze-Repsycho

# posted by douchebag1
7:09 am January, 7 Wheezer said...

DJ Scene’s squirt gun
bigger than other “weapon”
and doesn’t shoot blanks

7:15 am January, 7 Wheezer said...

Don McMillan douche
gave up comedy, Bud ads
to mack boobie hotts

7:18 am January, 7 Wheezer said...

Hott likes Betty Brant bob,
but instead of Spider-Man,
she lands Cockk Goblin

7:18 am January, 7 Condouchious said...

Wannabe DJ,
Grabs pistol to rob a bank,
A sperm bank that is

7:18 am January, 7 Jeff Reed Towel Dispenser said...

Abomination
Offensive in the Lord’s sight:
Birds drop from the sky.

7:18 am January, 7 Blinded by the Shite said...

DJ Hep-C Screen:
“Death to King Douchuous IV!”
God save her tatas

7:22 am January, 7 Wheezer said...

Tiny water gun
not enough to cool the burn
of Heat Miser Scrote

7:23 am January, 7 Chris in 'Baghdad said...

Douchespike contemplates suicide,
But weapon as impotent as his ween,
Clueless boobies keep on perkin’

7:25 am January, 7 Wheezer said...

My seven-eighteen
haiku was a cheap way to
post lovely Ms. Banks.
.
Where are you hatters?
Holiday hangovers should
not stall Friday mock!

7:27 am January, 7 Chris in 'Baghdad said...

@ Wheez…

It’s almost 8 on Friday night here in Afghanistan, so this hatter has it goin’ on…

7:27 am January, 7 saulgoode42 said...

Upper Lip Sniffer
Used his head for a swiffer
Unsustainable

7:30 am January, 7 Colossus of Choads said...

Douche it up here boss?
“Yeah go ahead douche it up,
give back my shades though.”

7:31 am January, 7 Blinded by the Shite said...

Wheezer leads the mock
Of number one douche in Maine,
The rest drool at boobs.

7:31 am January, 7 saulgoode42 said...

Asian boob gal says:
“See my chest, see my chest, please!”
DJ Scene, not heard

7:32 am January, 7 Condouchious said...

Douche laughs at small gun,
“I want to squirt you with this!”
Hott hangs head in shame

7:34 am January, 7 Medusa Oblongata said...

Wheezer is on fire
I leap from NyQuil coma
to share the burden

7:36 am January, 7 Medusa Oblongata said...

James Bond wannabe
agent double-o zero
says “Shaken, I’m turd.”

7:37 am January, 7 Blinded by the Shite said...

[img]http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lemwyuUxit1qaglc3o1_500.gif[/img]
http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lemwyuUxit1qaglc3o1_500.gif

7:37 am January, 7 Wheezer said...

Choad Anti-Cobra;
can this disease meet a cure?
“The strong smell of poo.”

7:39 am January, 7 Medusa Oblongata said...

In Italian
“Pistolino” also means
“small penis”. Nice gun!

7:39 am January, 7 dknutty said...

Vanilla Ice Scrote –
Squirt Gun does not compensate
for your small package

7:41 am January, 7 Medusa Oblongata said...

And so here we are
all this is the DJ Scene?
Ugh. Scene ya later!

7:43 am January, 7 Redouche-Reooze-Repsycho said...

Vanilla Lice sneers
Displaying the twin horrors:
Chest shave/treasure trail.

7:43 am January, 7 Wheezer said...

Blue/white striped boobies
look like shiny wax fruit; I’ll
bet they jiggle less.

7:44 am January, 7 Medusa Oblongata said...

DJ Scene makes plans
to fill the squirt gun with pee
drinks all night on tap!

7:45 am January, 7 Medusa Oblongata said...

Your gun is no match
for the fierce power of Frank
Bob hottie knows that

7:45 am January, 7 Redouche-Reooze-Repsycho said...

Pale, freckled failure!
Spikes should not go on his head–
They should go in it.

7:46 am January, 7 Condouchious said...

Douche found bigger gun,
With squirting that doesn’t burn,
Still can’t spray on hott

7:47 am January, 7 Wheezer said...

Good to see hatters
finally waking up! Bring
it, elder child cockks!

7:48 am January, 7 Redouche-Reooze-Repsycho said...

This pud needs beating–
Do I refer to my own
Or the tool pictured?

7:50 am January, 7 THEONETRUEDOUCHE said...

Max Headroom poser
Hot hides her shame with huge specs
Toy gun gangster pud

7:57 am January, 7 Wheezer said...

“Children of the Scorn”:
I knew ‘Isaac’ was a chick!
Malachai takes charge.

7:58 am January, 7 Medusa Oblongata said...

It’s the Slim Jim guy!
wait, he was saying “Eat Me?”
I heard “Shoot Me.” Ooops!

8:20 am January, 7 Wedgie said...

What she had in mind
When she said “I’m a squirter”
Was not this, stupid.

8:23 am January, 7 Wedgie said...

Douche fills his pee gun
Now looks for his next victim
Where is Darksocckk’s horse?

8:39 am January, 7 DarkSock said...

Awww man; stupid work.
Late to the Haikus again.
I will now resign.

8:40 am January, 7 DarkSock said...

Douche presses his luck;
Tests to see if she objects
To pulsed squirts on boobs.

8:42 am January, 7 DarkSock said...

Double – Oh – Sloven
License to feel…or be filled
She’s Pussy Galore.

8:44 am January, 7 DarkSock said...

He thinks he’s James Bond
More like another celeb:
He’s Vanilla Ass

9:09 am January, 7 Merle Baggard said...

Are those boobs real?

9:14 am January, 7 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Finger on trigger
will lead to accidental
discharge. Whoops, too late.

9:16 am January, 7 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

I’ll bet that he’s used to
taking shots to the face. Gay
porn fluffing pays well?

9:17 am January, 7 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

If douche would hold gun
to his ear, I’ll bet that she
still gets money shot.

9:18 am January, 7 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Woke up way too late
for this morning’s haiku fun.
Classes start next week.

9:20 am January, 7 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Striped bikini top
emulates his ribs: Unique
way of standing out.

9:29 am January, 7 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Even a clean-cut
douchebag is compelled to pack
oompa-loompa heat.

9:35 am January, 7 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Real boobies deserve
more than douche with a fake gun
for target practice.

9:54 am January, 7 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Spitzer in his douche
days gives plenty to pause for
reflection: Her boobs.

10:11 am January, 7 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Overwhelmed by all
the parallel stripes, hair, ribs,
knuckles, he cocks gun.

10:16 am January, 7 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Seeing the mark of
the drooped douche on her left boob,
he quickly cocks gun.

10:17 am January, 7 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Cocking a squirt-gun
is the boy-toy way of deal-
ing with her Big Guns.

10:25 am January, 7 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Big Bang Theory ex-
plains why her forehead bangs need
his foreskin-squirtgun.

10:28 am January, 7 Tom Choad said...

“DJ” for “douche juice”
He fills his squirt gun with it:
Grey Goose and Red Bull.

10:31 am January, 7 Tom Choad said...

She fills me with lust.
I want to gnaw her srtipes off
And blast his spikes off.

10:31 am January, 7 Tom Choad said...

Dammit– “stripes”!

10:38 am January, 7 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

His spiked hair makes for
great foot rub when he gives her
head during hold-up.

10:46 am January, 7 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Using squirtgun in-
stead of hot-water-bag is
novel way to douche.

10:59 am January, 7 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

She makes better use
of blue and white stripes than Old
Chap* in his dong-thong.

(regulars know about Old Chap)

11:10 am January, 7 DarkSock said...

Son of a gun, Son
Yo, I shoot to thrill, Son
Hey Yo, Get Some, Son

11:16 am January, 7 FoghornLeghorn said...

Despite the gun pose,
they are not Bonnie and Clyde.
Stripes is still hot, though.

11:23 am January, 7 Redouche-Reooze-Repsycho said...

I like the light blue
And white stripes like flag of Greece.
He’s just fag of grease.

11:25 am January, 7 Redouche-Reooze-Repsycho said...

Behind the Bleethy
Glasses, she puts the “ho” in
“Horizontal stripes.”

9:07 pm January, 7 Hardouche Wankstain said...

Smoke my pole you nas-
ty Big Boobe’d hot fuck piece
Towel for my seed

9:31 pm January, 7 Hardouche Wankstain said...

Twin Bobs Jackie O
Why do you stay with thin douche
Get Brett Weir I said

11:23 pm January, 7 Motorcycle Parts said...

The douchebag order is forced to compress heat Oompa-Loompa.

1:43 am January, 8 Scroteophobic said...

Is it just me or does the girl look a tiny bit like one of Dicy’s old avatars? Noooooooo! Come back from the choad side!

4:46 am January, 11 Car Parts said...

It is almost 8 Friday night here in Afghanistan, so has hatter It Goin ‘On …

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