Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Grampa Joel Wins
There are oldbags like Marvin, from yesterday, whom we mock for trying to douche it up like the kids.
And then there’s Grandpa Joel.
Who wins.
Because he’s still out there.
Hell, he’s still alive and lovin’ boobies. Have a full and complete nottadouche pass, Grampa Joel. Go in peace, and may your Metamuscil be fast acting.
This is funny and all. But I still hate Las Vegas.
Meanwhile, the brothabag behind them celebrates his first glass of Mr. White’s Special Lager.
I got a C-note says this won’t be the first time Vinnie “The Icepick” Travini got to whack Big Pussy.
Mammy Miami’s grampa Papa Palm Beach.
The winners of the crude bet erupted in cheers as Grampa Jones, without hesitation, clamped his gums down around the brown encrusted end of Darla’s year-old dried dessicated tampon.
After selling Snetsinger’s Jewellers Joel never returned to New York.
Arther passed away the next year, making Darla a very rich young woman. But she never ate noodles again.
He hasn’t been to temple in 500 sabbaths but I bet his bling is a Star of David and his cigars are wholesale. He buys his shorts by the gross.
Good for him. Even if it is his granddaughter.
Granda Joel (or Guiseppe) indeed does WIN.
He’s fooking beamingly happy, and is considering spitting out that Cancer Log, turning his head to the left, and gnawing some serious hottie nipple…
Then again, that could be his “personal assistant.” Damn…the things a girl has to do in this economy.
Great job!
Alan Arkin’s post-Oscar win celebration.
Grandpa Joe FTW! Enjoy your pass grandpa, you deserve it.
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I suspect that’s what my grandfather was doing in Florida in the early ’90’s. There were lots of ‘golf’ outings and other ‘errands’ that needed to be done without grandma.
You fuccen-a right he wins. That’s the guy that runs the sports book at the Sands. And she is just one of many job-related perks.
Old guys rule.
Grandpa Joel shook Sinatra’s hand, so he gets a lifetime nottadouche pass. He was in Vegas when the hotels were smaller but seemed bigger, tough guys were really tough, and douchebags were something that were thrown in the trash after finishing up with a ‘”professional girl” you met at the hotel bar.
I don’t care what you say. When Marvin gets his mack on with some hott, it’s amusing. When Grandpa Joel does it, you want to vomit. Joel, sweetie, your grandchildren consider that hott to be rather immature. It’s just… oh shit, excuse m… *runs to bathroom with finger to pursed lips*
[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Jay Louis, Eric Arnold. Eric Arnold said: @JayLouis This is genius. We all want to be Grampa Joel someday. http://bit.ly/fJBKBq […]
What a beautiful sight. Makes me want to cry. I can only hope to be chasing the hott when I reach that age.
Grandpa Joel made that quarter he pulled out of my ear into a necklace. Meh, I can’t mock this old guy. But if he started smokin hot chicks insteadbof smokin hot cigars he might live long enough to give me my quarter back.
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Man, I feel seriously Kroegered today. That one Tylenol PM really packed a punch. Watch out heavy machinery I’m coming to operate you!
Rehab…… Where all things Douche and Hott are bathed in the herp infested waters of the pool.
I think that’s MJ in the back and he’s got his dick in both of them. At once, son.
May I still be Douching it up in my ripe old days like this grand prehistoric fossil. This picture is a shining beacon of hope, even if it is tainted with douche.
Douche on Joel, douche on.
Grandpa Joel,,,,no GSR.
Nice rack on the hottie.
Immediately concluding his colonoscopy, Papa Joel snagged a Fuente second and someone to hold it for him during the indubitable incontinent doody.
Sam, Samuel “Sammy the Gaffe” Weinstein, told me I had a week to pay off my NFL account or Tonya “The Tranny” Bimbarelli would break my legs
YAY!!!!!!! When Grandpa Joel wins, we ALL win. Usually because we’re all on the “hard 6” when the point is eight and he’s rolling “Toity-Trees” like there’s no tomorrow
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@ Douchey Wallnuts I have a great personal Sinatra story if you’re interested.
IF by some weird small chance he really is getting that kind of tail at his age, I say: Good On Ya Mate! Granpa Joel FTW for the year, so far.
Now there’s a new douche category – the nottadouche / win category. So far, Granpa Joel is WAY i nthe lead.
most expensive first date….GP Joel pays by the roll of flesh
$5k easy
@creature:
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.Sure, she’s $5k a go, but he’s Terminal…and he’s hoping his bad ticker “checks out” whilst he’s in the saddle, stoked up on Viagra and Stoli…
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…come to think of it, that’s EXACTLY how I’m going out…
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(oink)
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They have a lot in common. They both have impressive tits.
Her cup has that Rx drug store symbol on it. And the only other female in the photo is the nurse on the left.
I think its a Joel’s umteenth wedding, and the big colored guy is the chuppa.
http://www.google.com/images?oe=utf-8&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&q=jewish+wedding+chuppah&um=1&ie=UTF-8&source=univ&ei=Lg8_TfqVGcHZgQeHs_D5CA&sa=X&oi=image_result_group&ct=title&resnum=3&ved=0CD4QsAQwAg&biw=1280&bih=851
He gets a GramPass.
Gramps FTW indeed. The best part is that the hotts think the old guys are “cute” when we all know that us males have the same filthy, disgusting, vagina-filled thoughts from the time it awakens in adolescence until the time they put us in the ground. That shit don’t go away, son.
Ok. I’ll stop with the son now.
Despite being the coolest geezer at the pool, he is still required by law to hike up his shorts over his belly button and sinch the drawstring tighter than a nun’s butthole.
I have to agree with Andy Capp’s name change to Guiseppe. This guy looks like an Angelo, Geno, or Silvio. I would know, I have 3 great uncles named Angelo, Geno, and Silvio. It’s best not to bring girl friends near them…there is generally some…unpleasantness.
Dickie V can sure pull some tail.
Wheeze:
“What has happened with underclassmen declaring for the NBA draft? It is absolutely wacky, baby!”
It’s Pat Morita. He took off the top half of his gi for the pic.
Anthont:
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I think Dickie V likes his boobies with a capital ‘BLBBBLBBLBLLLBBBBBBBLBLBLBBBBLBBBLBBBB.’
That of course should read “Anthony*” – I need a fuccen proofreader.
Hero status. Good call on the nottadouche.
“Back in my day we used to tie porch beef sandwiches around our necks and douse ourselves with Brill Creme and Vick’s vapo-rub to pull the hotts. That was the style back in my day. Come to think of it, I could go for a nice Ruben sandwich right about now. Where did that little bastard of a waiter go. Stupid shit brings nothing but drinks around, but no food. What kinda joint is this? I’ll tell ya. I used to be able to spend $5 and get a nice Ruben sandwich, a bottle of beer, and a hooker for a week! Now it gets me a condescending pat on the head. Yeesh, kids these days.”
She looks like she’s graced this site before and is sultry hott
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Grampa Joel or Joey is what is called a “Whale” He’s won and lost more money at the tables then she’s had hot meals. She thinks she’s playing him however he knows the “Game” and has been playing it I might add well since before she was born. Keep on playing Gramps and let her think she is “winning”.
What? Sorry, DB1, this is the one you had to pull out the Harold and Maude Preacher clip for.
Rehab. Where even saggy old man-boobs get to cop a feel.
.@ Douchey Lewis;
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“Unpleasantness” being code for said uncle cocking his head to one side, whistling low and saying to your GF “Hey, baby, great melons! They real?”
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Then the hand snakes towards said GF’s chestal region…just to check….
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…with hilarious results…
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Yeah, I had the same uncles…
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Nice to see a little bit of the “old Vegas” still exists.
Nice to know Rihanna goes old school when it comes to who represents her bid’ness.