Monday, January 10, 2011

Homeless Phil Collins Finishes Up His Set at the Worcester Dew Drop Inn

Hmm… maybe we should change the name to Zombie Phil Collins.

Juanita may have been impressed by the second set from Phil’s Bon Jovi tribute band, Slippery When Dry, performing nightly at the Worcester Dew Drop Inn. But Juanita still has to get up early for her final interview to become a flight attendant for Air Tran Miami.

So as much game as that paisley hat brings you, H.P.C., you’re still going back to the Motel 6 with only your tax lien paperwork to comfort you.

# posted by douchebag1
12:19 pm January, 10 creature said...

if Homeless Phil Collins were to bend over, I’m sure I will have found a good storage spot for my stickball wand….
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.
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& by stickball wand, I mean fence post

12:20 pm January, 10 creature said...

now Juanita there would merely get my mini merkin curling iron

12:23 pm January, 10 mr.reeve said...

Ssssshhhhhhh, Phil Colons does not want Juanita to figure out he’s a taint stain. Too late Phil. The secrets out.

12:27 pm January, 10 Wheezer said...

Homeless Phil Collins parties with Nicole Richie? Oh, that can’t be good.
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Son?

12:38 pm January, 10 Andy Capp said...

Homeless Phil is busy inserting his stash up Juan(ita)’s butt.
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No Rock Star Leniency for Old Rockerbags…
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1:00 pm January, 10 DoucheyWallnuts said...

I like the zombie designation. Also, what’s with the sideways picture of Juanita in the short dress? It’s upsetting my Vertigo, and by upsetting my Vertigo I mean it’s causing me to ejaculate. Finally, I think this guy looks more like Fagan from Oliver Twist, not to get too literary on yo’ ass….
http://www.henleyliteraryfestival.co.uk/programme/authors/ron-moody.jpg

1:02 pm January, 10 Deltus said...

Nothing says classy like a feather boa on a secretive aging pseudo-rockerbag. And by classy, I mean this makes me want to vomit a tasteful, spicy dinner all over a group of innocent, mewling kittens.
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Son.
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Okay, now I’ve jumped on the “Son” bandwagon, and I feel a little bit dirty because of it.
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But not as dirty as HPC’s crusty buttcrack.

1:10 pm January, 10 Captain Garanichode said...

As Big Black’s Uncle Jerry would say
“She’s a Dirty Girl.. a Dirty Girl…”

1:11 pm January, 10 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Tax lien on this dude? No social security number, no license, works for cash, no car, of parts unknown, dating a cheap PR transexual. He flies through life.
And by flies I mean that is what will eat his corpse on a hot summers day when the loan shark can’t find the bass, son.

1:13 pm January, 10 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Trotsky called. He wants his vote back, son.

1:21 pm January, 10 Sir Boo said...

Looks more like Tommy Lee.

1:23 pm January, 10 mr.reeve said...

Son!

1:31 pm January, 10 soy bomb said...

Looks more like a cracked-out Richie Sambora than anything. Or is that being redundant?

1:40 pm January, 10 Redouche-Reooze-Repsycho said...

Damn! I went to the wrong website again– this must be Craggy Aging Rocker Douchebags with Filipino Transvestites.com.
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“Juanita” my ass, son! Look at the bar-bruisin’ knuckles on “her” left hand. That’s no lady, Phil. Juan eata lotta cocck, but packs his own, too!

2:05 pm January, 10 Tom Choad said...

@Soy Bomb:
Please– Richie at least pulled real hotts.

2:12 pm January, 10 Et Tu Douche? said...

Damn!!, Armand Assante has seen better days, Son!!!!. Juanita does nothing for me

2:23 pm January, 10 joseph said...

cool

2:50 pm January, 10 Frank Mercurio said...

I’m the one who made him all cockeyed like that. I got shoved in too far.

3:05 pm January, 10 Blinded by the Shite said...

Goddamn that Phil Collins. Will he never die?

3:07 pm January, 10 Wedgie said...

Even money on Juanita still being alive the next day. Creepy Phil wannabe looks like a cereal killer to me. Props to Scrotato for the new urban slang.

3:43 pm January, 10 DarkSock said...

Hmm… maybe we should change the name from “Homeless Phil Collins” to “Actual Mick Mars”.
qaer

3:54 pm January, 10 Andy Capp said...

Holy Snitz, Dark Sock!
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Wuz trying to eat when I revisited this thread.
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You didn’t have a Living Dead Johnny Thunders photo, did you?! You had to drop the Mick Mars Bomb….
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Gotta clean my monitor, now….brilliant, cruel bastard, you…
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4:39 pm January, 10 Wedgie said...

Sock:

Was that photo of Michael Jackson taken before or after his death?

4:42 pm January, 10 Nancy Dreuche said...

@Frank, please write a book about your adventures, with Medusa’s okay of course.

Jacked up Phil Collins whose had 12 too many Tom Collins, which one of your eyes is the glass one? You went past douchebag and straight to lurky guy in the men’s bathroom.

I’m with the gang on this one. Juanita is definitely a Juan in transition. Juan on Juan Phil wants to play that game tonight, Juan on Juan I know…

4:47 pm January, 10 Andy Capp said...

Serious points for that lame Hall & Oates reference, Nancy.
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That kind of talk could make an old boozehound sweet on you…
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-b

7:43 pm January, 10 Stephanie said...

Dime a dozen N. Hollywood Bat Hat heroin dork.

8:10 pm January, 10 Tom Choad said...

@Darksock:
Ha ha! That’s great– I LOVED “Tales From the Crypt.”
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Wait– Mick Mars? You mean that’s NOT the Cryptkeeper?
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Homeless Phil Collins knows there’s something in the air tonight: the stench of AXE, 2-nonenal, and failure.

9:55 pm January, 10 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Son, you are scuzzy.
Broad, your photo-partner makes you just as. Scuzzy.

12:54 am January, 11 mahjong said...

I think it’s going to eat his body on a hot summer day, when the loan shark can not find the bass, Sun

4:54 am January, 11 Collaz B. Popped said...

Old Rockerbags are amongst the worst of the worst, I know bc I’m one of them. Well, kinda – at least I get paid and travel sometimes.

Juanita’s Kiss is on my fucking List, that’s for sure.

That girl can work a straight iron.

5:50 pm January, 11 Nike Air 2003 said...

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10:15 pm January, 11 nfl jersey said...

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12:34 am January, 12 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Everyone has to be somewhere. Retards, apparently, have to be on the internet.

1:56 am January, 12 Motorcycle Parts said...

Even if the money Juanita alive the next day. Creepy Phil seems to me cereal killer wannabe. Props scrotum slang new city.

8:17 am January, 12 Nancy Dreuche said...

@MP, Props scrotum slang new city to you too, son.

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