Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Retro HCwDB: With Bonus Kids Edition

Say what you will about the past, but one thing’s for certain. It’s remarkably dated.

EDIT: Reader SD points out that the pic is via the Awkward Family Photos blog.

# posted by douchebag1
11:15 am January, 5 Redouche-Reooze-Repsycho said...

Is that Zuckerberg on the left?

11:16 am January, 5 Redouche-Reooze-Repsycho said...

Great to see the tight, red Zyzz-shorts resurfacce on this site. Now we’ll have his minions DDoS-ing the site again and calling us all jelly-mirin’ hatterz.

11:29 am January, 5 Wheezer said...

Wow, that is a sweet mullet!

11:34 am January, 5 Baron Von Goolo said...

I see two kids, Vicki from The Love Boat and a female bodybuilder. This is the toughest “Where’s the douchebag?” ever!

11:36 am January, 5 DoucheyWallnuts said...

That is vintage Jerz, baby…The cradle of douchebag civilization. Doucheopotamia….

11:43 am January, 5 Mr. Biggs said...

… and then he was a she. Jeebus.

11:46 am January, 5 Nancy Dreuche said...

@RRR, egads you’re right! The original Zyzz shorts! And apparently if you wear those shorts you are required by law to have the gayest hair ever.
Note to ZYZZ and friends: I just mocked your leader jellybrahs. I await your comeatmeence with much mirrin and no homo.

11:47 am January, 5 Condouchious said...

Douchebag or pre-op tranny?

11:50 am January, 5 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Proof of Jon Bon Jovi’s lost years as a gay porn actor.

12:02 pm January, 5 tall guy said...

That’s the thing about history. There’s just so much of it.

12:02 pm January, 5 Charles Nelson Douchely said...

Just think, in 25 years, Ed Hardy shirted dickweeds will look just as foolish.

12:03 pm January, 5 Captain Garanichode said...

Quick! someone kill that zombie raccoon before it eats his brain and causes a wife-beater muffin-top BBR…
.
crap.. too late

12:05 pm January, 5 Captain Garanichode said...

almost makes modern douchebags look normal?

12:09 pm January, 5 wonderdouche twin said...

Kicking it by the “K” car, stylin’ and profilin’, I got a twenty saying there are Jenson Tri-axials popped up on the rear deck!

12:23 pm January, 5 Wedgie said...

Stop ripping off pictures of my youth.
Signed,
Denis Leary

12:50 pm January, 5 Medusa Oblongata said...

Dear God, what is that on the right? The little girl on the left knows to try and escape. Let her go, Gingerpuff!!

12:55 pm January, 5 Baron Von Goolo said...

“Okay, so, I was thinking about, like, a big Tribble eating Loni Anderson’s scalp. Can you do that?”
.
“What are ‘Things a barber should say “no” to’?”
.
“Correct, for $400.00.”

1:01 pm January, 5 Vin Douchal said...

The eighties sucked.
.
The Mustang came out as a hatchback, pop music took a decidely sucky turn, TVs were only 25″ screens, dudes wore spandex even if they weren’t preening shitty rock musicians on MTV , the Chrysler “K car” was the industry standard, porn money shots happened when the man pulled out and squirted on a gal’s leg, hi-fidelity was considered cassettes w/ Dolby noise reduction, John Henry Bonham died, John Lennon was mudered and worst of all the mortgage rate on my first home was 14.5 %.
.
Douchebags still commanded a presence, apparently. Fuck you, eighties

1:17 pm January, 5 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

I would re-caption this pic as “Pedobear: The Awkward Teenage Years”.

1:38 pm January, 5 mr.reeve said...

There is only one man who can pull off the Adam Curry look. That would be Adam Curry.
As for the plumb smuggling shorts and navel reveal, my eyes! Mmmmyyyyyy eeeeeyyyyyeeeeessssss!!!!!!

1:59 pm January, 5 DarkSock said...

That’s legendary transsexual film performer Debra Wanger.
.
.
Or so I’m told.

2:00 pm January, 5 DarkSock said...

Cindi learned a hard lesson about mixing her insulin shots up with the horse testosterone syringes.

2:01 pm January, 5 Redouche-Reooze-Repsycho said...

I think the proper term for that hairdo is a “sperm-mullet.”

2:12 pm January, 5 massengill said...

This guy got really into “Over the Top” and started working out and he won the young girl there in an arm wrestling match.

2:25 pm January, 5 mr.reeve said...

“when I turn my hat around, it’s like a switch going on. And I love that feeling. I feel like a machine. Kinda like a truck.”

2:59 pm January, 5 Et Tu Douche? said...

Ugggh!!!!, the Mullet just won’t go away.

3:25 pm January, 5 DarkSock said...

The mullet is dead; long live the mullet!

3:28 pm January, 5 Et Tu Douche? said...

Unfortunately in a disturbing close proximity to my neck of the woods this look is still in vogue.

3:55 pm January, 5 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

When “Annie” went douche, she did the whole enchilada.

3:56 pm January, 5 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Southern Indiana hasn’t changed much. Never will.

4:01 pm January, 5 Blind Squirrel said...

C’mon kids, let’s take this picture, so your big brother and his hussy can go to the Skid Row concert.

4:33 pm January, 5 Horace Dangleballs said...

Wow. I didn’t know the East German female Olympic wrestling team gave out K-cars to its members. A Trabant, no… but you’d think those commies would have sprung for a Volvo import.

5:41 pm January, 5 HeresJohnny said...

Spandex, tanktops and 400 cubic feet of Aquanet…. The 80’s seem like a distant memory.

6:05 pm January, 5 SD said...

I know you would want the same from them, so we should give a nod to the source of that photo (on the web at least). It was last year’s “Hot Tub Time Machine 80’s Contest Champ: The Situation” at Awkward Family Photos. The guy with the hair even offered his humorous commentary and a pic of himself today — I think he is a recovering DB.

http://awkwardfamilyphotos.com/category/photos/awkward-hall-of-fame/page/2/

6:31 pm January, 5 creature said...

Dood, Reo Speedwagon, like, totally stole my hairstyle!

7:00 pm January, 5 Medusa Oblongata said...

I lived in a Chrysler K car for 2 weeks once. No lie. Those were good times.

7:38 pm January, 5 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Sweet fucking Jebus! My brother had a K-Car that I used when my RX-7 was busted, which was most of the time, piece of rotary shit. Good times. Fucked a few chicks in it. But I can’t comment on this picture other than that I loved the 80’s and this picture is just wrong. Funny but wrong.

1:12 am January, 6 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Dude. The chick in the red shorts is FLAT.
.
I’d still fuck her.

2:45 am January, 6 Canada Pharmacy said...

My God, what is not? The little girl left trying to flee. Let her go, Gingerpuff!

7:57 am January, 6 skrag2112 said...

80s hair metal bag or shemale? Saw more than one of these types in my high school parking lot.

8:14 am January, 6 Tom Choad said...

MOTORIN’….
.
.
What’s your price for flight?
.
.
.
Why won’t the ’80s stay dead? Can’t we all agree to pretend this never happened?

8:20 am January, 6 Nancy Dreuche said...

^Agreed.

9:52 am January, 6 Wheezer said...

Since the photo is blurry in the wrong places, I just need to know one thing: Is that a Drunken State t-shirt? “Cheer, cheer for ol’ DSU” and all, but I miss those halcyon days when the trendoids wore this kind of crap along with their B.U.M. Equipment and Z. Cavaricci sweatshirts.
.
Or not.

11:24 am January, 6 Deltus said...

I wonder what this guy’s hair looks like today.
.
Then again, no, no I don’t. Cause he probably went onto something just as tragic when the trends shifted. And so on and so forth.

11:26 am January, 6 Lard Glug said...

I’m both disgusted and aroused by him

Signed, confused…..

11:27 am January, 6 Troy Tempest said...

Summertime in Delaware, 1986

11:31 am January, 6 Stephanie said...

Guess what year? It’s 1982. Judging from the penis shorts,and crappy car.
I’ll bet that guy doesn’t have any of that hair left and he weighs in at 280 pounds. I still see a lot of people with the same clothes and styles.

10:28 pm January, 6 Motorcycle Parts said...

I laughed at their leader jellybrahs. I hope your Myrrhina comeatmeence with many non-gay.

4:02 pm January, 7 SD said...

To those curious about our hair metal protagonist…. here he is today….

http://www.davidbarrytattoos.com/

As I said above, he has a sense of humor about this pic and offers some background in the AFP comments.

4:46 pm January, 7 Nancy Dreuche said...

@Motorcycle Parts, that’s why you’re the king MP. Canadian Pharmacy who?

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