Thursday, January 27, 2011

Smoot Still Says “Grooooo.”

Smoot.

2009 HCwDB of the Year Winner.

Still out there.

Still fauxed.

Still hangin’ with Vegas Bleethy Hotties and a pumped up bro.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. Many douches come and go when turning scrotal while hitting on the hotties.

Only the legends persist. With undying dedication of taintface.

# posted by douchebag1
7:05 am January, 27 Collaz B. Popped said...

Check out the S. American – Asian/Meximelt Hottie on the far left…its hard to see her bc Fish’s arm is almost blocking everyone out of the shot.
Fwaps.

7:06 am January, 27 Deltus said...

I imagine there was a time, when he was a toddler for instance, when Smoot wasn’t at all douchey. At that point, he was 100% human.
.
Then the infection took hold, and he went through various ratios of humanity vs. doucheitude. 90:10, 80:20, 70:30, etc.
.
Eventually, the humanity was completely gone, and we have the Smoot that we see now. 100% doucheness. Not a trace of humanity in sight. Absolutely pure. And a small part of the casual observer has to admire that, just for the purity. In much the same way one can admire how Hitler turned Germany’s economy around so quickly.

7:10 am January, 27 Collaz B. Popped said...

I thought Smoot was Fishslap – my bad.
There can be only one.

7:20 am January, 27 Crottenham said...

Snoot will go down in the annals of douchedom, as one of the greatest of all time!

Here’s to snoot, hail to the King!

My theory as to why you see him with so many different hotties, is that once the bleeths see his little, iddy, biddy wee-wee from all the injectables used to pump himself up, they move on to more fertile pastures…..just sayin.

7:21 am January, 27 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

In much the same way that derivates were good investments when the housing market was in bubble.

7:21 am January, 27 Crottenham said...

Btw, you think he cracks a smile when one of his bleeths is giving him a hummer?

7:22 am January, 27 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

In much the same that Arnold was a good governor.

7:23 am January, 27 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

In much the same way that Sarah Jessica
Parker is a cover girl.

7:30 am January, 27 Medusa Oblongata said...

In much the same way that Al Gore is an environmentalist.

7:32 am January, 27 Wedgie said...

^And invented the internet, don’t forget.

7:35 am January, 27 Wedgie said...

“Hey bro, what are you working today”
“Arms” .

7:37 am January, 27 Mr. White said...

When there is an open-air cabana-type set up in a picture, the probability of extreme douchosity is p = 1. FACT.

7:37 am January, 27 Mr. White said...

Oh, I screwed up the game. Sorry.
.
In much the same way that Darksock is a master yachtsman.

7:59 am January, 27 Anthony LaBaglia said...

In much the same way that MTV is Music Television.

8:00 am January, 27 Mr. White said...

In much the same way one can admire DB1 for introducing Snooki to the world.

8:22 am January, 27 Medusa Oblongata said...

In much the same way that Stackhouse is a poet laureate

8:23 am January, 27 Fatness said...

In much the same way the Bloodhound Gang unintentionally described the scene above:
.
“Yeah I’m hung like planet Pluto hard to see with the naked eye,
But if I crashed into Uranus I would stick it where the sun don’t shine,
Cause I’m kind of like Han Solo always stroking my own wookie,
I’m the root of all that’s evil yeah but you can call me Smootie.”

8:25 am January, 27 Medusa Oblongata said...

In much the same way Donkey Douche is a chivalrous gentleman.

8:26 am January, 27 Medusa Oblongata said...

In much the same way PBR is a fine, quality pilsner.

9:01 am January, 27 creature said...

those guys are lumpy

9:04 am January, 27 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

In much the same way a catapult is a good way of smuggling marijuana across national borders.

9:05 am January, 27 Medusa Oblongata said...

In much the same way as one could respect Michael Vick’s dog training abilities.

9:06 am January, 27 Frank Mercurio said...

In much the same way as I could be seen as a skilled proctologist.

9:07 am January, 27 Medusa Oblongata said...

Gross, Frank. You’re a proctologist, all right, but I’m the one with the skill.

9:12 am January, 27 One for the Choad said...

In much the same way Julia Roberts deserved the Oscar over Ellen Burstyn.

9:25 am January, 27 Et Tu Douche? said...

In much the same way that Jethro Tull won for best Hard Rock/Heavy Metal act beating out Metallica.

9:27 am January, 27 Et Tu Douche? said...

In much the same way Prinze & Four Prong are heterosexual

9:27 am January, 27 Captain Garanichode said...

just made a mess on pink bleeth

9:33 am January, 27 Et Tu Douche? said...

In much the same way Sarah Palin is a viable candidate in 2012

9:37 am January, 27 DarkSock said...

In much the same way Bush got the “Mission Accomplished” in taking out those weapons of mass destruction Sodom PooStain had laying around.

9:38 am January, 27 DarkSock said...

In much the same way that Michael Bay was the ideal choice of director for “The King’s Speech”.

9:39 am January, 27 DarkSock said...

In much the same way that Smoot owns a shirt.

9:39 am January, 27 DarkSock said...

In much the same way fists hurtle, Son.

9:39 am January, 27 Vin Douchal said...

In much the same way I haven’t been on the cover of Guitar Player magazine yet

9:40 am January, 27 Turtle Boy said...

In much the same way that amphibious reptiles make the best pets.

9:41 am January, 27 DarkSock said...

In much the same way that Pfah still checks in on us.

9:41 am January, 27 DarkSock said...

In much the same way that BCS always provided interesting links to fascinating web sites.

9:42 am January, 27 DarkSock said...

In much the same way that I want to be AssPear LaPlante’s bicycle seat.

9:42 am January, 27 Anthony LaBaglia said...

In much the same way that I can tie my penis in three knots

9:44 am January, 27 Anthony LaBaglia said...

In much the same way as Revolting Cocks paid homage to Olivia Newton-John with their cover of “Physical.”

9:44 am January, 27 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

In much the same way Kevin Kostner invented a machine to clean up oil spills.

9:45 am January, 27 Vin Douchal said...

In much the same way as blood on the tissue after wiping your ass isn’t necessarily a bad thing

9:46 am January, 27 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

In much the same way as bitching about the price of gas when you drive a Hummer.

9:48 am January, 27 DarkSock said...

In much the same way that Snooki has mantasies about railing Regis Philben with Frank Mecurio.

9:48 am January, 27 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

In much the same way as tickling a uvula with one’s size 13 foot.

9:49 am January, 27 DarkSock said...

In the same way that Snooki’s haircut will blow up like Jennifer Aniston hair cut craze of 1973.

9:49 am January, 27 Anthony LaBaglia said...

In much the same way that Flyteeth is an excellent fuccen babysitter.

9:50 am January, 27 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

In much the same way Elena Kagan is qualified to be a Supreme Court justice.

9:51 am January, 27 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

In much the same as NASCAR is the most popular spectator sport.

9:51 am January, 27 Vin Douchal said...

In much the same way as Monique Alexander getting all tatted up diminshes her skills

9:51 am January, 27 I R A Darth Aggie said...

How come I have this idea that if someone stuck either porch beef brodouchous bag, they’d fly off?

9:51 am January, 27 DarkSock said...

In the same way that former senator Rick Santorum is honored to have a sexual by-product named after him.

9:52 am January, 27 DarkSock said...

In the same way that “2 Girls 1 Cup” is an excellent first date movie.

9:52 am January, 27 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

In much the same way as the cast of Jersey Shore are now ambassadors to Italy.

9:53 am January, 27 DarkSock said...

In the same way that Plinky’s Mom supports the USDA Food Pyramid by being the same shape.

9:53 am January, 27 Vin Douchal said...

In much the same way as my last link to Monique Alexander didn’t work

9:53 am January, 27 DarkSock said...

In the same way that we avoid beating a gag into the ground, Son.

9:53 am January, 27 Vin Douchal said...

In much the same way as jizzing on your dog isn’t cheating

9:55 am January, 27 Et Tu Douche? said...

In much the same way that Goldman Sachs, JP Morgan et al. have learned from their mistakes and changed their ways.

9:55 am January, 27 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

In much the same way Mel Gibson celebrates Hanukkah.

9:58 am January, 27 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

In the same way Barbara Boxer will be the keynote speaker at the next national NRA meeting.

9:59 am January, 27 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

In much the same way as Jack the Ripper was a skilled OBGYN.

9:59 am January, 27 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

In much the same way Bill Clinton didn’t inhale when he “smoked” a joint.

10:01 am January, 27 Wheezer said...

In much the same way that Smoot is not trying to win the 2011 Thallbag Award.

10:01 am January, 27 Wheezer said...

In much the Samurai Scrote is part of our daily lives.
.
.
.
.
.
Who?

10:01 am January, 27 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

In as much the same way as Baywatch was a documentary about water safety.

10:02 am January, 27 Wheezer said...

way*
.
.
.
.
.
In much the same way I am a quality fuccen proofreader.

10:03 am January, 27 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

In as much the same way as OJ dedicated his life to finding the real killer.

10:13 am January, 27 Condouchious said...

In much the same way Snooki is an author.

10:14 am January, 27 Condouchious said...

In much the same way AIDs is an effective weight loss method.

10:50 am January, 27 Greek-God-like bodies and masculine features said...

In much the same way I eat pussy.

10:50 am January, 27 Greek-God-like bodies and masculine features said...

In much the same way I avoid watching boys change in the locker room.

10:52 am January, 27 Obama said...

In much the same way how I know what I am doing.

10:53 am January, 27 Olberdouche said...

In much the same way I have job security.

10:54 am January, 27 Dick Cheney said...

In much the same way people like me.

10:56 am January, 27 Dan Quayle said...

In much the same way eye speal.

10:57 am January, 27 Hulk Hogan said...

In much the same way my bulge impresses people.

10:57 am January, 27 Deltus said...

*looks at the thing of beauty the “In much the same way…” thing has become, tears well up*
.
It’s so fuccen beautiful… there’s just… no words.

10:59 am January, 27 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

In much the same way as wearing Tap-out gear and playing Streetfighter makes me UFC Champion.

11:10 am January, 27 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

In much the same way Snooki has a new spin off reality show tentatively named CowPig Slam. It’s True! I saw it on TMZ. Son.

11:12 am January, 27 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

@Deltus
I knew that one could roll.

11:15 am January, 27 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

In much the same way I am happy about being sober at 2pm. I forgot how awful the world really is.

11:48 am January, 27 Wheezer said...

In much the same way Smoot speaks standard English.
.
Dude. Son.

11:51 am January, 27 Medusa Oblongata said...

Deltus, today you are a golden ray of sushine.
.
In much the same way DarkSock feels about Ambien.

11:59 am January, 27 FoghornLeghorn said...

In much the same way that Rahm Emanuel resided in Chicago the year before the mayoral election.
.
.
Local flavor. Sorry.

12:12 pm January, 27 Et Tu Douche? said...

This is just too much fun,
.
In much the same way John Laregeman is currently on the Atkins diet.

12:14 pm January, 27 Et Tu Douche? said...

In much the same way Facebook DOESN’T mine your personal data and make tons of money doing so.

12:17 pm January, 27 Et Tu Douche? said...

In much the same way I’m really busy right now

12:26 pm January, 27 Stephanie said...

In much of the same way that stackhouse actually writes a blog. I think someone else taps the keyboard.

12:28 pm January, 27 Stephanie said...

In much of the same way Barney Fife can protect Mayberry.

12:44 pm January, 27 Medusa Oblongata said...

@ Foghorn–are you from the fine state of Killinois?

12:53 pm January, 27 George Bush said...

In much the same way my flight suit cod piece reflects what a giant tool I have in my pants, Son.

1:34 pm January, 27 Barney Frank said...

In much the same way I can help you keep your house.

1:43 pm January, 27 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

In much the same way Ed Hardy is a clothing designer.

1:55 pm January, 27 mr.reeve said...

In much the same way Charlie Sheen takes sobriety seriously.
Can you imagine being him for one night? It would probably kill me.

2:09 pm January, 27 Fatness said...

In much the same way DarkSock grades horses.

2:54 pm January, 27 creature said...

those guys are swole

2:54 pm January, 27 creature said...

son

2:55 pm January, 27 creature said...

daughter

2:55 pm January, 27 creature said...

100 bitches!

3:06 pm January, 27 mr.reeve said...

101….son!

3:31 pm January, 27 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Wow, Smoot really must be stacking those anabolic agents…He’s gotten bigger and his bitch tits are more pronounced. Abondanza!

4:05 pm January, 27 Nancy Dreuche said...

In much the same way Denis Leary is NOT going to use this bit in his next act.

6:27 pm January, 27 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

In much the same way Nancy Dreuche did not have a bukkake party with the Hardy Boys and Friends and Villians.

6:28 pm January, 27 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

In much the same way that I am no longer sober. That 12 hours was a fucking bitch.

6:31 pm January, 27 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

In much the same way as Britney Spears movie won the Academy Award for best future washed up multi-millionaire hosebag.

;
;
;
;
Little known fact, I invented the word Hosebag in 1978.

6:53 pm January, 27 Nancy Dreuche said...

@The Rev, hey wait, who told you that?! The Hardy Boys are gay Rev. But your right about the And Friends and Villians. Paaaaaartay!
I’m charting your sobriety on my wall. You know like parents measure their kids heights. You’re right above the light socket right now.

9:40 pm January, 27 massengill said...

In much the same way that Al Green loved hot grits.

9:49 pm January, 27 Sir David Douchenborough said...

In much of the same way Joran van der Sloot should be consulted for relationship advice.

Too soon?

5:31 am January, 28 FoghornLeghorn said...

@Medusa–I am a born and raised Illinois boy. After roaming the world, I’m back. And by roaming the world, I mean roaming Baltimore.
.
I’ve pick up that you’re a resident, too.

8:32 am January, 28 Medusa Oblongata said...

@ Foghorn–indeed. 20 years in DuPage County (Home of Donkey Douche!), 16 more years in Chicago proper and now I’m in Champaign. You?

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