Wednesday, January 26, 2011

When Puds Fly

Prinze still can’t believe he didn’t win the Weekly.

He blames the Funk.

No, really. That’s what he calls it when he explains it to the doctor.

Jessica offers Female Groin Shave reveal. Which, due to the gender bias and double standards of the douchadox, is perfectly acceptable and celebratory.

# posted by douchebag1
11:46 am January, 26 Wedgie said...

Female GSR is a time-tested winner, and should be required of all Albanians.

11:47 am January, 26 Wedgie said...

And those are the gayest jeans I have ever seen. And I’m from Southern California, which is the gay jeans capital of the world. And Russia.

11:56 am January, 26 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

There is so much wrong with this picture, but what I want to know more than anything is… Where is Jessica’s neck? Seriously. It looks like an eight grader photoshopped a random head onto her body and didn’t get it quite right.
.
Did she donate several vertebra to science?
.
Was she a mole in a real life version of whack-a-mole?
.
Was she decapitated in a freak lumberjacking accident and head her head re-attached?

12:08 pm January, 26 DarkSock said...

I’ll take her female groin shave reveal, and urge her to the next level, which is of course the upper clitoral hood Emmenological reveal (UCHER).

12:11 pm January, 26 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

jeans + http://www.mybedazzler.com = awesomeness!

12:13 pm January, 26 Nancy Dreuche said...

I’m with McCrudeshoes. This is a perfect example of Butterfaceneck. Prinze has boobs and abs. How is that possible? Unless he’s a she.

12:14 pm January, 26 mr.reeve said...

^I just launched my lunch all over my computer screen.

12:19 pm January, 26 mr.reeve said...

After this picture I am convinced that Prinze used to be a chick. Look at the nose job and how the boobs or pecks perk to a cone. The testosterone has not completed its job yet. As for yellow bottom, FGSR is always celebrated in my pants. GGGRRROOOOWWWWWWW

12:21 pm January, 26 Wheezer said...

Jessica may also be offering a butterface.

12:24 pm January, 26 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

C’mon everybody knows what a female GSR is really called…it’s a B.E.A.V.E.R. Do I have to spell it out for you?
.
Bravely
Exhibiting
A
Vaginal
Erection
Reveal
.
Knowledge is power.

12:24 pm January, 26 mr.reeve said...

This also washes away Douchey Wallnut’s Bosnian refugee picture from earlier.

12:25 pm January, 26 THEONETRUEDOUCHE said...

Prinze is a bra, three estrogen shots and tuck away from becoming Prinzess the tranny douche

12:28 pm January, 26 Taint Nuthin But A G-Thang said...

OH, DB1, MAKE IT STOP! THE BURNING SENSATION WHEN I PEE! MAKE IT STOP!

12:30 pm January, 26 mr.reeve said...

Prinze, the Jackson family called and they want their nose back.
.
.
SON

12:41 pm January, 26 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

More maths:
.
Prinze = 3 sticks of gum + the Nov. issue of O Magazine in the county lockup

1:03 pm January, 26 DarkSock said...

@ McCrudeShoes:
.
Nah, the photographer just caught her chicken-necking in the midst of a “Oh No You Dih’nt”.

1:06 pm January, 26 Wedgie said...

All you “butterface” whiners are forgetting what doggie-style was invented for. And Prinze has apparently forgotten what barbells were invented for. Get some……..biceps, pussy. Your girlfriend is about to pass you up in the arms race. Douche.

1:09 pm January, 26 mr.reeve said...

This whole delay on the comments blows. My 12:14 comment was for DS. SON

1:13 pm January, 26 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

@DarkSock

As in, “Oh no you didn’t just borrow my favorite jeans and bedazzle the pockets?”

1:14 pm January, 26 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

That’s no Jessica, that’s Appletinia. They had a great f*ck scene in “Nurple Rain”.

1:30 pm January, 26 Sir Boo said...

What’s up with the goggle sunglasses.

1:30 pm January, 26 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

My favorite song from “Nurple Rain” is Darling Snooki.
.
With apologies to the real Prince, which everyone knows is Prince Namor of Atlantis.
.
Darling Snooki
.
I knew a scank name Snooki
I guess you could say she was a bleeth queen
I met her in a night club bathroom
Matching colors with a tangerine
She said would you do me from behind
You can use your fist, you can’t hurt Snooki’s Vagine!
.
She pointed to her blackhole
I just couldn’t protect my eyes
She had so many diseases
There were crab cages on her thighs
She said dip your cockk in some turpentine
The lights blew out
When Snooki spread her vagine
.
Her asshole started spinning
Or maybe it was my brain
I don’t remember what she did to me
But my boner will never be the same
Aaaaieee! My shirt say’s “No Fear”
But its wet from my tears
Yeah she show you no mercy
But she’ll sho ‘nuf, sho ‘nuf
Show you her vagine!
Yeah Snooki
.
[Extended vomiting and weeping solo]
.
Woke up the next morning
Snooki wasn’t there
Fridge was empty all I found was her shart stained underwear
They smelled just like Axe and Boones Farm wine
That chick’s got one skanky gine!
.
Come back Snooki come back
I think I left my laptop in your ‘gine! Gine! Gine! Gine!
.
[Extended vomiting and weeping outro ]

1:38 pm January, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Purple Pain.

1:39 pm January, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Little Red Douchette.

1:49 pm January, 26 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

It’s like she was dipped in Nair.

2:15 pm January, 26 douche bagel said...

i’m convinced that everything he is wearing belongs to her

2:23 pm January, 26 Collaz B. Popped said...

His sunglasses are instantly worthy of mock – he’s showing a minimum of 6 true signs of Douchebaggery.

Inexplicable fashion selections only true Bags are capable of.

FGSR is the shit, but Prinze’s is showing so much worse.

2:23 pm January, 26 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

His abs start just below his adams apple.

2:44 pm January, 26 Medusa Oblongata said...

She’s manlier than he is. And that is an insult to both of them.

3:08 pm January, 26 Deltus said...

Damn you, Dude! I hadn’t even noticed the lack of neck thing until you pointed it out. Now it’s all I can see.

3:38 pm January, 26 I R A Darth Aggie said...

FTW: Fly means cast the pud off the nearest tall building and see if he can fly.

4:43 pm January, 26 DoucheyWallnuts said...

When man tits fly….

5:33 pm January, 26 Mr. Biggs said...

That’s a different lady, innit? See I told you he was banging last week’s second cousin!

12:31 pm January, 27 Stephanie said...

Does his fricken head always slosh to the side like that?

12:57 pm January, 27 Zowie said...

What sells it is the angle at which the douche’s head is cocked…

8:48 pm January, 27 Lil' Fartknocker said...

How does a 12 year old earn enough money to purchase such a snazzy tattoo?

10:32 pm January, 27 DR.FUNK said...

@Lil Fartknocker:

Prinze is toasting through his parents’ Nogales-based pharmaceutical fortune in Vegas pool party comfort.

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