Tuesday, February 1, 2011

The Sharkbag is Ready for His Closeup

An eagle eyed reader writes in having caught 2010’s HCwDB of the Year finalist and recent entrant into our hallowed Hall of Scrote, The Sharkbag, making his television douchal debut on some taintfung spreading show called “Bad Girl’s Club.”

I don’t know what this show is.

And yet, somehow, I do. For it is pudly.

EDIT: Note that The Sharkbag, of course, Runs with the Goose at all times. And by Runs with the Goose, I mean exhausts his trust fund at a rate his family accountant frowns upon.

# posted by douchebag1
1:44 pm February, 1 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Sharkbag has to much sneer to mack on a chinless mongoloid whale like that. Or maybe she needs some bugs wiped off or he might just roll with the tards.

1:46 pm February, 1 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

And where the fuck are her handlers? Mongoloids should not be out drinking alone. Not that there is anything wrong with that.

1:49 pm February, 1 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

“Oxygen Network”?? Yeah, I’d blame that shit on an Eagle Eyed Reader too. 😉

2:09 pm February, 1 soy bomb said...

***SPOILER ALERT***
.
The episode ends with The Sharkbag getting torn limb-from-limb by a pack of feral wolverines.
.
or so I hope.

2:10 pm February, 1 Wedgie said...

She doesn’t look impressed. Sharky is slipping.

2:20 pm February, 1 Captain Garanichode said...

The Not-So-Great White and his not-so-impressed vixen in an epic air guitar battle to the end…

2:28 pm February, 1 Captain Garanichode said...

Is she playing Air Harmonica or a phallic suggestion via Highball?

2:36 pm February, 1 Geoffrey said...

Doesn’t have anything to do with this pic but thought you would ‘enjoy’ it

3:00 pm February, 1 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

@Geoffrey

That was lowdown. How can I eat supper now Bra? Son

3:42 pm February, 1 Douchey Lewis and the News said...

^ What was Zyzz’s catch phrase again? Was it “cum in me, bro” or “cum on me, bro” bro

4:13 pm February, 1 soy bomb said...

@Geoffrey: Thank you very little.
.
I still can’t get over the fact that those Zyzz-gobblers had the audacity to call us “phaggots” while they openly admitted to viewing images and movies such as the ones in Geoffrey’s link.
.
@Douchey Lewis: Both phrases are equally apropos, though I think there are regional disputes over their usage. Kinda like when to use “soda” or “pop” over here in the states.

4:38 pm February, 1 creature said...

gee boss, I thought by ‘runs with the goose’ you meant he leaves a trail of excrement wherever he alights

4:38 pm February, 1 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

This is how I imagine Sharkbag at the club.
.

4:44 pm February, 1 creature said...

@ Geoffrey
just as I thought JiZyzz-bag is a lifelong narcissistic Lebo sac-o-crap from downunder

4:51 pm February, 1 creature said...

Sharkbag, on the other hand, is merely a pile of spent condoms wrapped in sausage casing with a trail of gelled pubic hair upon it

4:59 pm February, 1 Douchey Lewis and the News said...

@ soy bomb…ahh ok well since we’re in
“pop” country I’ll go with “cum in me, bro”.
.
.
Did that sound kinda gay? Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

5:08 pm February, 1 Deltus said...

I thought it was “cum on me, bro”. Zyzz likes it for the protein for his skin.

5:37 pm February, 1 Nancy Dreuche said...

@everybody, its “Come at me bro, come at me hard”. I’m not gonna look at the link. Its been a long day and I’m still overgayed from having to look at the one bro on a shamromantic date.
.
Sharkbag on the Oxygen Network? “An eagle eyed viewer” nicknamed DB1 spotted it. Good tag DB1. I don’t watch the Oxygen network because I find air offensive. Also the basement doesn’t get that good of reception.
.
Sharkbag, I see you’re trying to copy Stackhouse in the ugly chick department. What happened to Renee? She was the only thing that made you a contender for the crown besides you hawk, sneer and BOSS tattoo. This is harder than usual for me to watch. Next thing you know you’ll be pictured with 4th Tiers. 4th TIERS Sharkbag! I’m taking my “Don’t blame me I voted for Sharkbag” bumpersticker off my car and replacing it with a “Honk if you’re horny.” A sad day indeed.

6:42 pm February, 1 Mr. Biggs said...

Well it’s a bit refreshing that it’s on the Oxygen network. You know, the one that caters to an all-female audience. Kinda funny that their audience is so homebound that they see guys like Sharkbag as ‘bad boys.’

8:33 pm February, 1 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Apparently Sharkbag exhausts the gel sections of the hair products aisles of local stores. Only possible explanation for this is he must be a Michigan State Spartans alum or fan gone douche.
Now, if he dyed it green…..

8:54 pm February, 1 DarkSock said...

Vince made the best of a bad economy by renting his skull out as a labia/taint crease cleaning brush for husky girls.

9:39 pm February, 1 Troy Tempest said...

lots of men give their penis a name.
.
sharky named his “Burt”.
.
not for any good reason. He just thought it was a good name for his dick.
.
“Yep – Burt’s ready to crush some whobag’s pussay!”
.
I need another drink.

10:29 pm February, 1 Medusa Oblongata said...

Fuck the Snowpocalypse. I got told not to come to work today. I agreed with myself that it would be a productive day, I would not fap to bukakke porn, I would get shit done and keep the walk shoveled. Now here it is midnight and there’s about an inch of snow on the ground. I shoulda fapped myself into a coma and then prank-called the Ex Mr. Oblongata, pretending to be a mail-order Thai ladyboy who’s going to steal his car. I’m gonna use Sharkbag to scrape my windshield. That is all. Son.

12:03 am February, 2 The Dude said...

Years ago, I named my dick ‘Lucky’. Ya know like “wanna get Lucky?”

I hate my life. Well, not really but today it hurts because of sharkbag. It’s all his fault.

Now, I will continue to not understand Twitter.

3:57 am February, 2 Motorcycle Accessories said...

Still I can not overcome the fact that these Zyzz-turkeys had the audacity to call “phaggots” as they have openly admitted that the display of images and movies such as those associated Geoffrey.

6:27 am February, 2 Steve L. said...

how many accountants are “family accountants”?
that has to be the single saddest form of accountancy in the world. period.

6:46 am February, 2 Greek-God-like bodies and masculine features said...

My dear Jebus, Zyzz is gayier then I am. nd that’s pretty damn gay.
Have I mentioned lately that I like cockk and boys? Probably

7:04 am February, 2 Vin Douchal said...

Sharkbag’s unique “look” has him earning his SAG card as a paid extra in Godsmack’s remake of the 1960’s Leslie Gore smash hit “Sunshine, Lollipops and Rainbows”
.

.
.
Try to go through the rest of the day without that tune rattling around in your head

10:55 am February, 2 I R A Darth Aggie said...

exhausts his trust fund at a rate his family accountant frowns upon
.
Charlie Sheen? is that you?

6:02 pm February, 2 Lil' Fartknocker said...

Dude on right…2nd row from camera…the original bleach blonde poobag.

6:03 pm February, 2 Lil' Fartknocker said...

^^In the video, I mean^^

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