Thursday, February 24, 2011

Where’s Waldouche?: Smuggy Lips Edition

Somewhere in this lineup of Southern Bottle Blondes whose legs all need a triple pooch, I’ve carefully hidden a Smuggy Lips.

Oh sure, you thought he was innocuous at first.

But this story won’t end well.

# posted by douchebag1
1:50 pm February, 24 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

These are not the lips I have been looking for. I’d do the three non-blondes with a shovel and a parakeet.

1:52 pm February, 24 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Seriously, just drop your daughter and her friends off at the mall and then leave. No one like a helicopter dad.

1:54 pm February, 24 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

WTF is it with chicks stickin’ all sorts of things between their boobs that aren’t penile related? Cell phones? Cigarette packs? Bras? Seriously, this is an epidemic that needs to stop. There is a shortage of perfect breasts in this world and it would be a pity to damage any of them.

1:56 pm February, 24 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

On closer inspection, Lippy McGerbilcoock is in for three unpleasant surprises a few hours later. He was unaware that the producers of Le Cage Au Folles were sticklers for authenticity and that he was roofied by insatiable cockwielders.

1:58 pm February, 24 Foxy Mocksy said...

I love me the smokes in the cleavage. Breast cancer stick anyone?
.
Smuggy lips, you’re old. Too old for the smuggy lips move.

1:59 pm February, 24 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

These lips were made for rimming and thats just what they do. At four in the morning these dudes are going to shit all over you.

2:01 pm February, 24 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Lefty Blonde looks hot, but minus 6 points for the Marlboro Stuff!! What’s up with that? I smell an invention – The Ciggy Bra by Whamo – so you don’t sweat on the cigs and you lower their profile while maintaining your curves!?

2:02 pm February, 24 Wedgie said...

I don’t know, Rev, I kinda think the dude with the smokes stuffed between his tits is cute.

2:06 pm February, 24 Vin Douchal said...

Left Bleeth gets more reptilian with each shot.

2:11 pm February, 24 soy bomb said...

I love how chicks spend hours to get all dolled up: the hair, the makeup, the sexy dress, the perfume, the shoes, choosing between a thong or nothing, etc. only to jam something ‘tarded down their tops, nullifying it all. As the esteemed Bunsun mentioned above, if it’s not penis related, it’s as useless as that drunk-assed douche in this post.

2:14 pm February, 24 Vin Douchal said...

Excuse me, …ahem.. is this thing on? , test test…thank you
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Girls In Yoga Pants.com
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Goodbye afternoon

2:18 pm February, 24 jonezy said...

^^ YogaPants, as expected, blocked by work. that’s too bad

2:19 pm February, 24 jonezy said...

so if middle chick has the phone set to vibrate, I think that would technically count as a motorboating when it rings

2:45 pm February, 24 Et Tu Douche? said...

Waldouche Oldbag you fail and by fail I mean let it go. These girls tolerate you you because you pick up the bar tab. It’s time to move on Son!!, older girls can be just as fun, Hott and more likely to carry on a reasonably normal conversation.

2:59 pm February, 24 Vin Douchal said...

In Case You’re Wondering Who That FREAK Is In The New Old Navy Commercials Dept:
.
Melissa Molinaro
.

3:02 pm February, 24 Et Tu Douche? said...

Speaking of Yoga Pants, check out title character in “Forgetting Sarah Marshall” in the downward dog position it’s a quick shot and might be a body double but it’s a good shot none the less. If Not there’s always Mila Kunis to droll over in that movie.

3:11 pm February, 24 smackdouche said...

I can actually smell the cigarette smoke, tequila and nacho cheese doritos.

3:11 pm February, 24 Douchble Helix said...

I pretty sure he fucks all 3 of ’em, then steals her smokes.

3:26 pm February, 24 Rev. Chad by remote said...

@Wedgie

I’d do him too and find out she was a dude on Montel. There is something about their foreheads that leads my boner downwards. Boss.

4:07 pm February, 24 Hermit said...

There are few things as sexy as a pack of Marlboro 100’s singing an irresistible siren song from a woman’s heaving cleavage.
But a man can be driven to near-madness by a crack pipe peeking provocatively over the waistband of a pair of turquoise sweatpants.

4:28 pm February, 24 Vin Douchal said...

But a man can be driven to near-madness by a woman that can suck start a Peterbuilt

4:29 pm February, 24 Vin Douchal said...

… But a man can be driven to near-madness by a woman with a homemade labial circumcision

4:30 pm February, 24 Vin Douchal said...

… But a man can be driven to near-madness by a woman with a yoga suit made of severed lemur penii
.
.
see how I worked that in, eh?

4:31 pm February, 24 DoucheyWallnuts said...

The caption for this photo could be, “Three Dogs Night.”

Also, nothing says “classy broad” like wedging a pack of smokes in your cleavage.

The one on the right keeps up the streak of at least one tranny per week showing up in pictures on the site. I think it was on the cover of Bukkakke Illustrated this week, as well.

4:42 pm February, 24 Hermit said...

…but a man can be driven to near-madness by a moistened, pulsating beaver fired at close range.

4:56 pm February, 24 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

@Wedgie

Only a dude would spend so much time on a head of receding hair like that and use her well muscled shoulders to shove a pack of smokes in her shirt. Now Vin’s picture is not a dude.

5:03 pm February, 24 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

@ Et Tu, Kristen Bell is the real deal as far as bod goes. Probably would not need a body double to pull it off.
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http://images2.fanpop.com/image/photos/10900000/cute-cute-butt-kristen-bell-10918967-667-950.jpg
.
Still, my wood belongs to Mila.

7:29 pm February, 24 ehcuodouche said...

There are three chicks and four foreheads in that picture.

7:35 pm February, 24 MC 900 Foot Douchebag said...

Nothing says classy like a pack of smokes stuffed in your tits. Fuck my life.

7:38 pm February, 24 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

That blonde on the left is one smokin’ hot chick.
That blonde in the middle has ring tones that would vibrate a taut condom off a hard prick.
That blonde on the right is Daddy’s Little Girl, as the “won’t end well” photo verifies.

8:45 pm February, 24 Douchey Lewis and the News said...

@Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche nice Princess Bride quote.
.
I’d go through the fire swamp to be that cell phone.

1:36 am February, 25 appointment setting said...

Seriously, this is an epidemic that needs to cease. There is a shortage of perfect breasts in this world & it would be a pity to damage any of them.

5:56 am February, 25 Daggerbagger' said...

I’d smoke her boobs regardless of the health risk. Boobarettes, Ciggaboobs

7:02 am February, 25 I R A Darth Aggie said...

Is that an iPhone in your cleavage, or are you happy to see me? oh, it is an iPhone. Curse you, Steve Jobs!

8:07 am February, 25 THEONETRUEDOUCHE said...

Nothing I love more when i nuzzle the cleave of a hottie that the smell of a stale Marlboro hard pack, delish!!!

11:48 am February, 25 Wheezer said...

Is it me or does Ms. Marlboobie have kind of a Marg Helgenberger vibe?
.
‘Cuz I sorta like Marg Helgenberger – now, if “Blondie” would do something different with that hairstyle of hers, she’d look a whole lot hotter.

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