Saturday, February 5, 2011

Your Saturday Higgs Boson Lobehead

Someday, physicists will finally detect the long sought and near mythical Higgs Boson particle.

Where will they find it? In this guy’s lobe.

Yup. Physics humor.

I blame last night’s experiment with orange juice, gummi bears and Mad Dog 20/20.

# posted by douchebag1
12:48 pm February, 5 Douchble Helix said...

The Dog is only 13% now. That’s fucked up.

12:51 pm February, 5 creature said...

if left unchecked, trash builds up on bar tops

12:51 pm February, 5 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Higgs Boson? After attacking us with Night Oranger and new Sister Christian we have to view Hubcap Ear and Skank Arm on a Saturday. Well fuck off I don’t like the Higg’s. I’ll raise you two gluons and three quarks. I need a drink, two doobs, a shot of Smirnoff, and my Xanax. These two have major self-importance issues. ICK! I think Nancy would do them. Go Packers!

1:26 pm February, 5 KingBadger said...

Yes but is she really a hot chick? Implants, tatt, probably fake-blonde. Ho or no?

2:47 pm February, 5 DarkSock said...

I’d like to put a spin on her scalar bosons with my photon gun…OK, not really….If she drank a penis collider it would only shake loose Valtrex™ particles, son.

2:50 pm February, 5 DarkSock said...

What? The Packers are in the play-offs? Ha!!! Go Brett!!!

2:52 pm February, 5 DarkSock said...

Socially hobbled by the gaped anus of his vestigal twin brother implanted in his left earlobe, Jake was forced to settle for a lower caliber of girlfriend.

2:54 pm February, 5 DarkSock said...

Later that even, in a messy bedroom accident, Jake and Tina learned that her skinny ankles were smaller in circumference than his lobe rings by a couple of centimeters.

2:54 pm February, 5 DarkSock said...

Lance was eventually able to work himself up to a sweet pair of 22″ rims.

2:57 pm February, 5 creature said...

just as a reminder, Tina had Jed’s earlobes enlarged to her pre surgery boson cup size…son

3:00 pm February, 5 Nancy Dreuche said...

@The Rev I would not touch thes two with a ten foot pole. Well maybe I’d try to throw a pole through this dumbass’ ear just to show off my excellent hand eye coordination but nothing more. I’m sure my alter-hypersexed ego troll me would have a go though. And then she would follow it up by downing two McFlurries and entire apple pie.
.
This is a classic case of “Look at me, I’m different! Validate me.” Yeah guy you can stretch your body parts out and you’re different, just like all the other morons who have the same piercings. I can’t wait to see
people like this when they’re sixty and their earlobes are at their waist.
.
The chick sort of looks like a white Ru Paul.

3:00 pm February, 5 Medusa Oblongata said...

So what’s the theme night at this bar? Poo?

3:01 pm February, 5 creature said...

I believe Tina has a scull tattooed around her gaping vortex…she fondly refers to it as ‘Boson’s Abyss’

3:51 pm February, 5 Stephanie said...

He used to use those rings as his cockk rings but they are far too small.

The Packers are going to win,you know,and win by a touchdown.

3:56 pm February, 5 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Hey DB1. You should try Milkduds, 7-up, and Strawberry Hill Boone’s Farm.

5:16 pm February, 5 Wedgie said...

A slice of a.b.s. sewer line pipe used as jewelry….who knew? Recycle, reuse, renew.
And something in here smells like poo.

5:19 pm February, 5 Wheezer said...

Instead of the Grimley ‘do, Higgs should be combing it forward. He might be able to fool her for a couple of months longer, at least.
.
Or not.

5:26 pm February, 5 Hermit said...

Don’t confuse the Large Hadron Collider with the lesser known, but far more insidious, Large Hard-on Collider. Believed to be located in a dank, moist tunnel somewhere deep in the mountains of Homoslavia,® the Large Hard-on Collider is experimental and still under construction. If successful, it will be capable of sending out world-wide electronic impulses which will cause spontaneous, involuntary penis to penis sword fighting among male members of society. According to one noted Nuclear Physicist, “The potential number of hard-on collisions may be unprecedented, the likes of which have yet to be seen outside a dressing room of an Off-Broadway Musical.”

5:35 pm February, 5 DarkSock said...

^This was foreseen by obscure gay physicist Albert PeenStein.

5:41 pm February, 5 creature said...

@ Hermit
also known as Plinky’s mom’s womb

6:29 pm February, 5 Nancy Dreuche said...

@Hermit, well done again. Reminded me of someone’s (Can’t remember whose, but it definitely wasn’t Denis Leary’s, because it was original) story about Motorcycle Parts beaming directly into our brains.

@DarkSock, hahahaha, nice. I love reading all the straight answers which is all the other ones and then reading yours. You’ve toned down the equine butt peeing in here, I was starting to get worried. Its good to see your spreading the good word elsewhere.

6:29 pm February, 5 DarkSock said...

^So I horse-pee-bomb this weird world war 2 website about the Third Reich that for all the pretense seems to be nibbling around the edges of Nazi-sympathizing; they’ve asked me back three times now.

6:37 pm February, 5 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Her chihuahua jumps hoops through that douchebag’s earlobe rings.

7:09 pm February, 5 Wedgie said...

Shouldn’t that be “Higgs Bosom Particle”?

8:57 pm February, 5 Baron Von Goolo said...

DB1, it’s time to start merchandising.
I know I’d buy a “I peed in a horse once” coffee mug.

9:23 pm February, 5 Fatness said...

Whoop-Di-Douche…I thought she *was* the chihuahua.

9:25 pm February, 5 creature said...

^make mine a flask!

9:40 pm February, 5 tall guy said...

Lord I cannot stand those type of piercings. Nancy D is spot-on with her deconstruction. “Eww, look at me…look at how edgy I am!” What a big stupid.

11:41 pm February, 5 Mr. Biggs said...

DEAR GOD MAKE THE LOBE MONSTROSITIES STOP!!! MAKE THEM STOP!!!

Seriously. This was kinda interesting in the mid-90s, in an “I’m rebelling against the system but don’t care about other people at all so I’ll just make myself as ridiculous as possible to I can dismiss the sheeple” way.

But then the masses took hold of this as something dangerous. And rather than this being the culture of a few outcasts, it became a ridiculous contest of who could get a bigger lobe ring than the next. I bet this guy’s a Nickelbag fan.

F LOBE RINGS.

11:43 pm February, 5 Mr. Biggs said...

And DB1, I must say that Higgs Boson things works. It’s such a machine-tool-perfect shiny ring, containing such a vacuum within, getting sucked in by the further vacuum inside douche’s head, it could very well nestle a Higgs Boson within.

5:33 am February, 6 Hermit said...

This guy’s ear apparel would impress me, only if they contained perpetually rotating, brightly-colored ball bearings within their radii, the right side moving in a clockwise fashion, the left counter-clockwise.
.
.
I still wouldn’t approve of his haircut.

6:58 am February, 6 Horace Dangleballs said...

“My God! It’s full of stars!”

10:16 am February, 6 DarkSock said...

“I peed in a horse once” bedpan? Sold!

10:43 am February, 6 Troy Tempest said...

fake rack, stupid tatts, dyed hair, mascara applied with a shovel, eeewwwwwww! Her cooter has cooties. I wouldn’t pee in her horse with someone else’s dick.

11:17 am February, 6 anon said...

next stop in his ears: manhole covers.

12:22 pm February, 6 DarkSock said...

Even congress is getting in on the act.

12:48 pm February, 6 DoucheyWallnuts said...

She is heinous…
.
Of all the looks that will go horribly wrong once aging seriously sets in, the big earlobe hole surely is the worst. Tatts can be covered or even removed, bad hair can be lost or changed, clothing burned or given to Goodouche Will, but a big earlobe hole is like Herpes and luggage, you can never get rid of it.

4:10 pm February, 6 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Big Earlobe Holes are right out of Africa and the San Francisco gay scene, a strange enough collaboration before doucehbags took up doin’ ’em.
I’m all for idiots putting holes in their heads, as it proves they already have more holes than Swiss head cheese. I can just hear the air whistling through the airheads as I type.

4:11 pm February, 6 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

I once met Higgs Bosun on a Navy ship, years ago.
“Nuff said.

4:20 pm February, 6 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Higgs here burns with a dirty red flame on a gelled blonde wick,and not that clean blue gas ideal the Gas Companies like to advertise; which leads me to conclude he’s more likely a dirtbag. Huggin’ a tatted pinko scumbag. Hey, I describe what I see, not what I know is or is not inside their hearts.

6:30 pm February, 6 anon said...

holy fuck, when did howdy doody get a piece of 1 and 1/4 inch pipe put in his earlobe?

4:25 am February, 7 Collaz B. Popped said...

Earlobe cockk ring,,,,,,cool.

10:45 am February, 7 Captain Garanichode said...

Atleast he’s wearing his cock ring correctly… She’s HAWTT!

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