Friday, March 18, 2011

Friday Haiku

Prongs of New Orleans,
Mutant Douchewank Jazz Fest,
Kelly’s thinking, “Prick!”

Hi. I have money.
Woo-hoo! I like guys with cash!!
Let me touch your ass.

— saulgoode42

Jurassic Park 4:
Revenge of The Asian Club
Hermaphrasaurus.

— Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche

Kelly pulls Prong’s tie.
Now loop it in ceiling fan
And hang that sum bitch

— Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt

Oooze left behind by
Low tide of humanity
Douchageddon looms

— Dude McCrudeshoes

Job at Home Depot
Won’t happen if they see this
On her facebook page

— Vin Douchal

With most makeup off,
we learn that Ace Frehley was
hotter than we thought.

— Mr. White

Mardi Gras douchebags
Laissez les bon temps rouler
Right over hotness

— fidouchiary responsibility

Sin. Debauchery.
Four Prong flies his flag. The flag
That will taint her pooch.

— The Reverend Chad Kroeger

Blinded by the prong,
Both his nuzzle of drunk blonde,
And stab to the eye

— Condouchious

# posted by douchebag1
7:09 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

Prongs multiplying,
like spreading of disease, and
her eye’s infected.

7:10 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

Four? Maybe fifteen.
Douchebags and adouchtrements
can’t stop spreading ill.

7:11 am March, 18 saulgoode42 said...

Hi. I have money.
Woo-hoo! I like guys with cash!!
Let me touch your ass.

7:11 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

Fuccen porcupine
needs one of those quills shoved up
ass, but he’d like it.

7:12 am March, 18 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

The prongs mutate to
back of head. Is new species
4-prong-a-saurus?

7:13 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

Members Only coat?
That club sucks. Members are all
of doubtful gender.

7:14 am March, 18 saulgoode42 said...

Four Prong knows no fear
His game is telling the truth
Guess where those beads go

7:14 am March, 18 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Jurassic Park 4:
Revenge of The Asian Club
Hermaphrasaurus.

7:16 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

Sorry Four Prong, but
you can’t get a do-over
with Douchie Awards.

7:16 am March, 18 Vin Douchal said...

She wakes hungover
Can’t tell yet if there’s regrets
Sees prongs, pukes green beer

7:17 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

Ugly choad with gimmick:
his spikes. Do hotts like that shit?
Their brains are vacant.

7:17 am March, 18 Mr. White said...

With most makeup off,
we learn that Ace Frehley was
hotter than we thought.

7:18 am March, 18 fidouchiary responsibility said...

Mardi Gras douchebags
Laissez les bon temps rouler
Right over hotness

7:18 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

Wheeze mucks syllables:
should say “Ugly choad’s gimmick”
but can’t count today.

7:19 am March, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Sin. Debauchery.
Four Prong flies his flag. The flag
That will taint her pooch.

7:19 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

Ugly choad’s gimmick:
his spikes. Do hotts like that shit?
Their brains are vacant.
.
(fixed)

7:19 am March, 18 saulgoode42 said...

That’s not a hot blonde
It’s the first bangable phone
Four Prong is loaded

7:19 am March, 18 fidouchiary responsibility said...

Parade of douche-taint
Rolls down Bourbon Street of dreams
Leaves hotness in wake

7:20 am March, 18 Mr. White said...

One prong is missing
Sadly, it went through hott’s ear
Lobotomy time.

7:20 am March, 18 Vin Douchal said...

Pronger ups his game
Nuzzles sweet hip’d floozy hott
Looks uncomfortable

7:20 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

Lots of beads…..she’s showed
her boobies so much that they’ve
nearly disappeared.

7:21 am March, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Four Prong Etouffe.
Cuisine going downhill. Kelli’s
Future holds regret.

7:21 am March, 18 fidouchiary responsibility said...

Did she earn those beads
By flashing sweet suckle-thigh
At that smarmy scrote?

7:21 am March, 18 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Kelly whispers “Come
home with me. I need you.” He’ll
be garden weasel.

7:21 am March, 18 Condouchious said...

Blinded by the prong,
Both his nuzzle of drunk blonde,
And stab to the eye

7:21 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

March Madness: anger
stems from knowing this douchewank
touches hott women.

7:22 am March, 18 Vin Douchal said...

The happy ending
Spins Prong around on dance floor
Chokes him out with tie

7:22 am March, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

We got ta go.
Jambalaya, Filet Four Prong.
Sorrow on Bayou.

7:24 am March, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

oops^
.
Emeril’s new dish.
Hermaphrodite Poo
With spiky douche sauce.

7:24 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

The doorman in back
wonders which idiot let
this asshole inside?

7:24 am March, 18 Condouchious said...

What’s that on her face?
Maybe fun Mardi Gras paint?
Or prong attack scar?

7:24 am March, 18 Vin Douchal said...

Can’t look away from
Her undies poking from shorts
She’s got a sweet pooch

7:26 am March, 18 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

That’s the last time I
will use hedgehog DNA
when spiking Prong’s drinks.

7:26 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

N’awlins, St. Paddy’s,
hair gel, Katrina create
poison…..as seen here.

7:27 am March, 18 Vin Douchal said...

Zombie in the back
Wants to eat this couple’s brains
Gonna go hungry

7:27 am March, 18 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Kelly pulls Prong’s tie.
Now loop it in ceiling fan
And hang that sum bitch

7:28 am March, 18 Mr. White said...

Math: I see six strands
of beads. If six equals this,
twelve equals blumpkin.

7:29 am March, 18 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

How on Earth is it
possible that Prong has more
beads than Kelly does?

7:29 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

Girl, you must be drunk
to flirt with this ugly schmuck.
What is wrong with you?

7:31 am March, 18 Vin Douchal said...

Prongs has fashion sense
Of the third grade recess crowd
And disco throwback

7:31 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

Listen up, Barbie:
Four Prong’s built like a Ken doll,
only pricks are up top.

7:32 am March, 18 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Chemistry: Her drink
was probably spiked with high
dose ketamine.

7:32 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

(Try that one again with 5-7-5 now…..)
.
Listen up, Barbie:
Four Prong’s built like a Ken doll,
only pricks up top.

7:33 am March, 18 Vin Douchal said...

Job at Home Depot
Won’t happen if they see this
On her facebook page

7:33 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

Must be Fag Tuesday:
everyone who likes men hit
this specific club.

7:34 am March, 18 Doucheywallnuts said...

Thought in Four Prong’s mind
“There’s March Madness in my pants”
While bleeth prays for death

7:35 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

I don’t know what’s up;
feelin’ like hatter today,
but what else is new?

7:36 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

I have two weeks left,
then back to day shift, so I’ll
start missing Haiku.
.
You guys will prob’ly
be glad for that change; perhaps
numbers will pick up.

7:39 am March, 18 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Wheezer always leads
off haiku Friday. Steal all
my ideas from him. Sad.

7:40 am March, 18 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Oooze left behind by
Low tide of humanity
Douchageddon looms

7:40 am March, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Kelly has great time.
It’s all fun and games until
She loses an eye.

7:40 am March, 18 Doucheywallnuts said...

New bleeth fashion trend
Wearing panties in public
Now, lose the douche please

7:40 am March, 18 Condouchious said...

She must want those beads,
This hedgehog isn’t sonic,
Just a mardi gras schmuck

7:43 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

Doc, I may lead off,
but I hope to set table
for heart of order.

7:43 am March, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Green panties at bar.
Kelly trolls for men. Llttle man
Leprauchan complex.

7:44 am March, 18 DarkSock said...

4-Prong wants 3-way
But two whites won’t make a Wong.
^That was a bad pun.

7:44 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

See what I did there?
A baseball analogy
during spring training…..

7:46 am March, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

^oops.
.
Kelly’s friends smell puke.
Where can it be? Don’t step on
it. Ewwww! It’s that thing.

7:46 am March, 18 DarkSock said...

Her eye of coitus beckons.
His brown eye of flattus honks.
Both eyes yearn yogurt.

7:46 am March, 18 Doucheywallnuts said...

“Parlez Vous douchebag”
He whispers in the bleeth’s ear
She cringes and farts

7:47 am March, 18 DarkSock said...

Like war plane decals
Each spike on his head brags of
A weenus he’s drained.

7:49 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

I want to see Prong
at new place on Bourbon Street:
French Drawn and Quartered

7:50 am March, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Kelly thinks he’s quaint.
In the way Canadians,
Enjoy college hoops.

7:55 am March, 18 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

This site could be called
4 Prong All The Time, Plus Some
Much material

7:56 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

Prong should plug gap in
Ring of Fire; if plates still slip…..
well, we tried to help.

7:57 am March, 18 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

4 Prong Wong wears white
He thinks his hair/clothes delight
Actually its blight

7:57 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

Franklyn’s “ceiling fan”
at seven-twenty-seven
deserves the front page.

7:58 am March, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Kelly liked his sense
Of humor. Until Four Prong
Said, “Pull my finger.”

8:00 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

Haiku 69?
Long way from days of hundreds;
I long for those times.

8:01 am March, 18 Chris in 'Baghdad said...

The prongs are multiple,
The tatt is rare,
The cash he must blow to photo with Hotts

8:02 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

Prong’s bad eyesight made
him take close look; he’s bummed. There’s
no Adam’s Apple.

8:02 am March, 18 DarkSock said...

Much later tonight
Prong will reek of puke and pee
Just like Bourbon Street

8:04 am March, 18 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Kind words there, Wheezer!
Appreciate the kudos
But all mocks are good!

8:06 am March, 18 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

He’s dressed white and orange
He wants to be traffic cone?
I’d run him over!

8:08 am March, 18 MC 900 Foot Douchebag said...

I think I’m normal
But this chick makes me want to
Sniff her panties now

8:10 am March, 18 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Kel’ has one taut bod!
That waist makes me want to, errr…
Lock myself in stall.

8:11 am March, 18 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Yes! Yes, 900
The pull of Kelly is strong.
I hope she pulls me!

8:13 am March, 18 MC 900 Foot Douchebag said...

Sniff her panties now
My new fetish does scare me
But I will work through

8:15 am March, 18 MC 900 Foot Douchebag said...

Things I would do are
very disturbing to me
yet I will do them

8:18 am March, 18 MC 900 Foot Douchebag said...

Body beats her face
That tummy is so slamming
But face a tad rough

8:20 am March, 18 DarkSock said...

We can almost see
Her camarillo brillo;
Scrub my pots and pants

8:22 am March, 18 Wheezer said...

MC, she looks fine
and has pleasant demeanor;
just drunk with a douche.

9:13 am March, 18 Et Tu Douche? said...

Four prong is so wrong
It’s Anal beads he covets
Carnivale never the same
.
Zappa song reference in haiku, Nice!!!

12:17 pm March, 18 pumptan said...

Speed Racer jacket
cock ring on finger poised, ready
face paint smear on crotch

2:40 pm March, 18 MC 900 Foot Douchebag said...

Wheezer… I agree, but the body is better. This would be a case where a guy would say, “Pretty face, but her body makes her even better.” I posit that it’s just a bad picture.

4:54 pm March, 18 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Something akin to
the Loch Ness Monster was seen
in the bayous: Prong.

5:00 pm March, 18 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Prong thinks Mardi Gras
is great time to wear shrimp head-
dress to honor his.

5:05 pm March, 18 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Prong changed his name to
Prawn, fled to the Bayou, and
zyydec’d a co-ed.

5:11 pm March, 18 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

French Quarter’s version
of Moulin Rouge is Prong’s red
shirt and windmill hair.

5:18 pm March, 18 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Lissome blondes with par-
ty beads fall prey to Prong’s spiked
drinks: Head Job Jizzies.

5:29 pm March, 18 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Prong made Mardi Gras
history when HE was crowned
she-male “Cajun Queen.”

5:44 pm March, 18 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Yanking his tie for
a tete-a-tete also works
for a tit-a-tit.

11:36 pm March, 18 Motorcycle Accessories said...

Its true the Revenge of The Asian Club.

12:36 am March, 19 soy bomb said...

Motorcycle Accessories:
.
Love ya, but not 5-7-5. Try again, foolio.
.
.
sb

11:02 pm March, 19 Steve L. said...

New Orleans has a
new disaster on its hands.
the dire plague of prongs.

Leave a Reply

What is 13 + 6 ?
Please leave these two fields as-is:
IMPORTANT! To be able to proceed, you need to solve the following simple math (so we know that you are a human) :-)