Thursday, March 17, 2011

Some Days You Just Gotta Pin a Dress to your Tighty Whities

And try to talk the Ubergnaw Southern Sue into taking a ride on what Tad calls his “Own Private General Lee.”

# posted by douchebag1
7:19 am March, 17 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

It’s a rare case of the douche who is paid to pose. That doesn’t make it any less wretch inducing. This cloud has silver lining though: If Sue is paying for photographic evidence of her low self esteem and desperation, I bet a dollar I could get her drunk and blow me in the men’s room.

7:20 am March, 17 The Minister Scott Stapp said...

Mr. Beckham? Mr. Beckham? Please return your penis to the men’s department. Mrs. Posh has found your vagina.

7:20 am March, 17 Mr. White said...

They’ll be the most popular couple on the next season of “16 and Pregnant.”

7:25 am March, 17 DarkSock said...

In spite of years of therapy, Wayne was only able to partially suppress his cross-dressing urges.

7:44 am March, 17 Bag A said...

Sue, I’d like to introduce you to ‘Boss Hogg’!

7:46 am March, 17 The Minister Scott Stapp said...

Just got an email from Reverend Chad. He will be back from wife imposed exile for Haiku if he’s not too drunk. He’s cooking whiskey-braised everything for his St.Patrick’s Day bash. Get drunk and shit green. Son.

7:49 am March, 17 I R A Darth Aggie said...

Male stripper == autodouche? or is there a performance art exemption?

7:51 am March, 17 Noble Pils said...

@Bag A 7:44–It looks like the dude in the tablecloth-inspired shirt is already introducing his “Boss Hog” to the douche’s man “Cooter”

7:53 am March, 17 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Tad was never good at none of that there book learnin’ or nuthin’ so it didn’t surprise anybody at Jimbo’s Fatback BBQ Palace when he bedazzled one of the tablecloths directly to his uniform, God bless his heart, because he couldn’t read the directions.

8:00 am March, 17 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

It really doesn’t get disturbing at Jimbo’s Fatback BBQ Palace until he starts prancing around and singing this.

8:02 am March, 17 Deltus said...

@Darth: I think there’s a line with male strippers. A certain amount of douchedom comes with the job, that can’t be avoided. But there’s a line you can cross where even any professional exemption is thereafter nulled.
.
Ubergnaw Southern Sue is whom jean shorts are made for. Unless you have legs and an ass like that, you are NOT allowed to wear them.

8:13 am March, 17 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Ubergnaw Sue’s jean shorts are a little bit high waisted. That’s “little bit” in the same sense that Stephen Tyler is looking a “little bit” more like a male lesbian every day.
.
What gives? Shorts like that should be 3 inches from waist to leg opening. Max. It should be the law. I think there’s a freshman 15 hiding behind a stretch panel.

8:14 am March, 17 Wheezer said...

I’d like to set sail on the U.S.S. Li’l Brunette Firmboobies! Wow, what a cutie pie! I’ll bet she’s about 5’1″ in her clogs…..mmmmm…..

8:20 am March, 17 Christopher Walken said...

What…kind of Wood …doesn’t……..float?

8:21 am March, 17 Robert Wagner said...

Why that would be Natalie Wood.

8:44 am March, 17 Bigphatnotadouche said...

she is so innocent…
he is so douche…
Did they exchange skirts?

8:46 am March, 17 Et Tu Douche? said...

I have no idea what’s going on here so I’m gonna say fuck it. It’s tourney time let the upsets begin.

9:04 am March, 17 Wheezer said...

@Et Tu Douche?, 8:46 a.m. –
.
It’s the best time of year: March Madness is underway, spring training is in session, and hell, it’s almost springtime! And that means hotties will be wearing less and less…..

9:43 am March, 17 Earth said...

Strawberry Shortcake called, she wants her dress back. Earth to douchebag, you’re wearing underoos and half of a dress. Is this how you envisioned this career in “entertainment” going?
@McCrudeshoes, I’ll take that bet and pay you with the one I steal from this tool’s G-string.

9:53 am March, 17 Bagitty Douche! said...

isn’t it eric bana?! oO
if not i would like to call him eric banana instead!

11:26 am March, 17 Et Tu Douche? said...

@ Whezzer,
Amen brother!!!

1:34 pm March, 17 Stephanie said...

Super Hero Orange Dress,only saves maidens that are badly dressed.

2:19 pm March, 17 The Big LeBagski said...

HALL OF HOTT?!?!?!

2:36 pm March, 17 Mr. Biggs said...

Wow. I never thought I’d see a faux-kilt as an addouchrement.

6:17 pm March, 17 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Those frilly square dance skirts, and the people who wear them, have fallen to a new level of tacky.

6:18 pm March, 17 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

The winner of the party “male slave auction” could hardly wait to dress up her catch in the petticoat he deserved.

6:23 pm March, 17 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Southern Gay Pride celebrates the bullfighting season with the appropriate
a) toreador
b) picador
c) matador
d) flora-dora
attire.

6:25 pm March, 17 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Southern Belles…can’t live with ’em, can’t live without ’em.

6:28 pm March, 17 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Ruffles and Flourishes, the dance version.

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