Thursday, April 14, 2011

Captain Lubing and Tracey Gnaw

Captain Lubing is obsessed with his own personal White Whale. Which is actually the strange alien disc hiding in his rayon shorts.

The tatt asks: “Why you?” Lubing? Because the world needs ditch diggers, too.

Tracey Gnaw was once a sweet, firm yet softly taught in a quarter bounce way. Now, after sailing with the Captain, she’s acquired arm scurvy.

Need to suck on more Bud Light Limes, there, Tracey.

# posted by douchebag1
1:22 pm April, 14 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I’d love to scalli her wag.

1:22 pm April, 14 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I’d love to arm her yard.

1:23 pm April, 14 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I’d love to pirate her Carribean.

1:23 pm April, 14 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I’d love to man her sails.

1:24 pm April, 14 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I’d love her to salty my dog.

1:24 pm April, 14 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I’d love to johnny her roger.

1:25 pm April, 14 DarkSock said...

I’d love to give her Rum Sodomy & the Lash

1:26 pm April, 14 DarkSock said...

I’d let her shiver me timbers

1:26 pm April, 14 DarkSock said...

I’d heave her ho

1:26 pm April, 14 DarkSock said...

I’d give a warning shot acrost her bow

1:27 pm April, 14 DarkSock said...

I’d swab her poop deck.

1:27 pm April, 14 Mr. White said...

I’d Darksock her speedboat.
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What?

1:27 pm April, 14 DarkSock said...

I’d Captain her Tenille.

1:30 pm April, 14 Fatness said...

I’d starboard her port.

1:30 pm April, 14 Douchble Helix said...

Did you hear about Tracey? What a shame, huh?

1:40 pm April, 14 Bighead Todd & the Douchsters said...

I’d sweathog her meat-body. BOOSH.

1:41 pm April, 14 Goldimocks said...

Kissy lips tatt ahoy!
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Those are the cutest brass knuckles ever Tracy. You’re sure taking this Kat Von D shit to the next level.

1:53 pm April, 14 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

Est. 1984 ? whoa, that’s an old looking 27. probably the ink poisoning.

And I’d like to fondle her doubloons

2:03 pm April, 14 Vin Douchal said...

I’d like to toss them over for ballast

2:03 pm April, 14 Vin Douchal said...

I’d like to erase their tatts with a belt sander

2:04 pm April, 14 Vin Douchal said...

I’d like to flush them out of the bilge

2:16 pm April, 14 jonezy said...

wow. sorry to break the puns, but holy shit she is Hott.
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I’d “Ho!” her land as I was docking my warship

2:19 pm April, 14 jonezy said...

Anyone link to this yet?
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I foresee a Friday thoughts post with that one

2:31 pm April, 14 Baron Von Goolo said...

The shame of his inkless nipples is too much for him to bear.

2:31 pm April, 14 Baron Von Goolo said...

I’d fill her ballast with invasive species.

2:38 pm April, 14 Vin Douchal said...

Bruins v Habs starts tonight. Epic rivalry for the ages. But please don’t mention last year’s humiliating 7 game choke to Philly after leading 3-0. We’re over it …
.

2:44 pm April, 14 Fatness said...

Tracey may have softly taught me just about anything but it would take a taut teacher to bounce a quarter off of. Just sayin’.

2:57 pm April, 14 creature said...

I’d shave the barnacles off her hull

2:58 pm April, 14 creature said...

it appears as if sailors scrawled on this pair like the walls of the head…or maybe the brig
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I’d crest her transom

2:58 pm April, 14 creature said...

i’d breach her stern

3:07 pm April, 14 Fatness said...

She can unfurl my jib.

3:20 pm April, 14 Wedgie said...

Wow, you guys look great! No, seriously.

3:25 pm April, 14 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

@Vin
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Pregame fight video?
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@Jonesy
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Good tag.

3:36 pm April, 14 Stinky Pete said...

I’d fuck the shit out of her…uh…Matey.

3:46 pm April, 14 soy bomb said...

It looks like he has one of those helpful “cut here” dashes (- – – – – – -) around his throat. Has anyone seen my machete?

3:59 pm April, 14 Douchble Helix said...

I’d keelhaul her aft.

4:22 pm April, 14 Et Tu Douche? said...

@Vin

I used to have seasons in the old Garden back in the 80’s when Neely, Markwart, Bourque, Millaaah, Byers, Lemeiin et al were doing there thang. Man I miss those days when hockey was hockey. One of the best B’s v Hab’s tilts was when Nilan was skating off the ice suckered punched the Rat and a bench clearing brawl ensued that spilled out into the hall way. One Canadian tried to come over the B’s bench to be met by none then coach and all time Bruin great The Tazmanian Devil. Terry in street close looked like he could still lick some ass. The best part of the whole thing was Nevin Markwart tracking down the ultimate douchebag Claude Lemiuex and pummeling him away from the main fray. The pictures afterwards was priceless and Fred Cusick RULED!!! …….
B v Habs, old school
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GO B’s!!!!!!!!!!, Son!!!
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Oh and I rusty her scupper

4:25 pm April, 14 Et Tu Douche? said...

Correction that would be Kick some ass not lick, regarding Taz

7:08 pm April, 14 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Have any of you seen Jackass 3D? These two look like they were shot out of the Poocano…..
.

8:12 pm April, 14 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Taken together I think their tatts give a pictorial representation of all the “Chuckie” movies. Or the Spanish Inquisition. Kinda hard to tell.

8:13 pm April, 14 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Oh and for all the submariners out there: I’d let her Kursk my Scorpion.
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What? Too late?

8:30 pm April, 14 Medusa Oblongata said...

Est. 1984: Big Douchebag is watching you.

8:35 pm April, 14 Medusa Oblongata said...

@ Jonezy 2:19–Holy crap, i wept salty fuccen tears of hilarity. “Bronado”. Whoever made that deserves an all-you can eat BBQ, followed by an enthusiastic handjob.

10:22 pm April, 14 One for the Choad said...

Pity. Tracey has a lovely face and bod, but the tat sleeve, plus the pelvic tat, is auto-Bleeth. As I tell my kids, you made a bad choice.

10:54 pm April, 14 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Tracey Gnaw is enough to make any man chew his dentures to shreds, and her douchepal Cap’n Lubing is evidence that some will eat them, if skin tatts are any indication.

12:16 am April, 15 Guid is Good said...

Mary Ann has sure bleethed up since getting back from that 3 hour cruise.

5:52 am April, 15 MoeDouche said...

What a shame. Such a pretty girl…You see folks. This is why taking shots of tequila at one in the morning NEVER leads to good decisions an hour later.

10:19 am April, 15 DarkSock said...

M.O. really knows how to motivate a guy…I have never had BBQ followed by an enthusiastic handjob; I just get too tired after all that pork to move my hand that fast.

11:40 am April, 15 Banana Hammock said...

I’d de-barnacle her bilge’s

11:41 am April, 15 Banana Hammock said...

i’d be the chowder in her clam…

11:44 am April, 15 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

I’d flood her torpedo tubes.

12:10 pm April, 15 Stephanie said...

The modern day Gilligan’s Island…Skipper wears the strap on.

9:16 am April, 17 Frank said...

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