Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Ziggy the Sneery Mug Guy

It’s like, ironical, yo. Like on that show.

Make it in every pic and the ladies’ll giggle and dig the sunglasses and maybe Ziggy’ll finally get some of that mythical ass he’s read so much about. In books. And magazines.

Oh Linda. Your eyes betray your innocence and fear. Like a youngly born fawn stepping uponst the dewdropped dappled summer hillsenvolgen. I would lick your kneecaps.

# posted by douchebag1
1:18 pm April, 12 Wedgie said...

She looks a little embarrased, with good reason.

1:19 pm April, 12 Wedgie said...

Embarrasssed. There, now they average out to the correct spelling.

1:24 pm April, 12 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Ziggy needs.. a bra..ah..ahhhhh.
.
I liked her better when she played Artie Bucco’s wife Charmaine.

1:28 pm April, 12 Geoffrey said...

D on’t
H old
R etards
J ust
R run

1:28 pm April, 12 Geoffrey said...

R un

1:29 pm April, 12 The Dude said...

Oh man, Ziggy shouldn’t be used on guys like this. I named my cat Ziggy. I you ever met that cat, you’d know what I’m talkin’ about.

Can we call him Squiggy instead? He looks kinda like a fat version of Squiggy from Lenny & Squiggy in “Happy Days”.

1:38 pm April, 12 Mock Ring said...

Serious THO action on this douche. I know you guys are all about the bosoms here but I assume you prefer it on the hot chick. DB1, can we get more giant ass can pics up on here?!!! I’m talkin hard to ignore Tig Ol’ Bitties. These douche mamms are unacceptable!

1:42 pm April, 12 Bigphatnotadouche said...

Fear and loathing are seen in those sweet fawn eyes.
Get me a gun and I will end it for the douche.
He needs to swallow a bullet.

2:05 pm April, 12 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

What’s funny is that this guy does not emulate any of the standard douche characteristics regularly featured on this site. He’s obviously never seen the inside of a gym, no tatts, no fake tan, no body shaving. He’s a bad dresser. Yet he is such a slapable douche, he could win a weekly. Ironical.

2:06 pm April, 12 Geoffrey said...

Is that chest reveal?

2:54 pm April, 12 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Get your hands off my 16 year old Jennifer Connelly Ziggy. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qz9OJoy6Jzs&feature=related. She looks like my sweet 16 Tami the whore.

3:27 pm April, 12 Mock Ring said...

@RevChad, which one was Tami again? Nature bush or matronly arms? I have a hankerin’ for a rambling nonsensical story about boozin’ usein’ and abusin’. Make it happen my man. I know your fresh outta rehab, but I’m sure you have more hit in you. And if it could have a smidgeon of Seadoo I would be appreciative.

4:01 pm April, 12 Anonymous said...

someone should drop-kick that sack of shit

4:01 pm April, 12 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Hmmm, Ziggy has 40 A cups.
And she has…34 AAs.

4:33 pm April, 12 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

This dickbrain should be renamed “swirly”. As evidence I present his hair. And you know for a fact that his head has seen a considerable number of toilets.

4:37 pm April, 12 El Bastardo Magnifico said...

Is he wearing scrubs?

4:40 pm April, 12 soy bomb said...

Here’s a douche that I would have no problem mocking directly to his face, because I know that I could kick his flabby ass. Does this alpha male reaction make me a douche? Perhaps. Come on me bro, you jelly?
.
.
.
In my defense, at least I wear normal shirts, have yet to make a kissy face and have the decency to shoplift sunglasses from the men’s department.

4:41 pm April, 12 Greek-God-like bodies and masculine features said...

He likes cocck and so do I. He has boobs and so does she……kinda.

4:43 pm April, 12 Greek-God-like bodies and masculine features said...

soy bomb, I’ll come on you….without the jelly, bro!

4:50 pm April, 12 Mock Ring said...

GGLBmutha fuckin’MF! Where have you been?!!! I’ve missed you like the desert misses the rain. No worries, all the douches pictured recently, not hot. Not worth your time. Notta Ryan Phillipe lookalike in the whole bunch.

5:01 pm April, 12 Wedgie said...

Rev:
Check her out in “The Hot Spot”, complete with boob reveal and bonus points because young Jennifer was 20 and legal when she made this one.
You old perv, you.

5:02 pm April, 12 Wedgie said...

Dirty
Hole
Ring
Jr.

5:03 pm April, 12 Wedgie said...

Not to be confused with d.h.r..senior.
Who is much dirtier.

5:08 pm April, 12 Wedgie said...

On a completely unrelated note, I saw an interview with Carly Simon during which she dropped some hints about the subject of her famous song “You’re So Vain”. She has already given some hints, saying that the letters A & E are in the clue to the person’s identity. Most recently, she added the letter R to this group. Now, I’m not one to make accusations, but I couldn’t help but notice that all three of these letters are found in the name “Reverand”.
Just sayin’.

5:19 pm April, 12 Mock Ring said...

@Wedgie, our Reverand Chad is film screen legend Warren Beatty?! Well that explains a few things, except for the whole Canada angle. And his obsession with all things Morgan Fairchild.

5:22 pm April, 12 soy bomb said...

Wedgie, I am unashamed to admit that I own a DVD copy of “The Hot Spot.” Don Johnson killed it in that one. I also “killed” it to a prime-time Jennifer Connelly.

5:23 pm April, 12 soy bomb said...

I agree with Magnum Douche above. Had I a vote for the weekly, it would go to this embarrassing douche.

5:31 pm April, 12 Wheezer said...

I’d gladly pee in the horse Jennifer Connelly is riding here.
.
Even if I have to deal with DarkSock’s sloppy seconds.

6:21 pm April, 12 Deltus said...

Hey everyone, I haven’t completely abandoned HCwDB, it’s just I’ve started a new job and I’m hyper-busy right now. I’ll get HCwDB back into my normal routine soon.

6:34 pm April, 12 Mock Ring said...

Please do Deltus. I think if I referenced the term “Tier 2” noone would know what I was talking about except for you. Good luck with your new job, but please check in. Boobs galore as always and your inept er indepth analysis has been missed.

6:47 pm April, 12 MC 900 Foot Douchebag said...

Magnum Douche P.I. said…
What’s funny is that this guy does not emulate any of the standard douche characteristics regularly featured on this site. He’s obviously never seen the inside of a gym, no tatts, no fake tan, no body shaving. He’s a bad dresser. Yet he is such a slapable douche, he could win a weekly. Ironical.
.
.
Magnum… I used to work with a guy EXACTLY like this guy and I described him the same way you did this guy.

6:50 pm April, 12 jackzhang said...

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7:25 pm April, 12 DoucheyWallnuts said...

David Bowie said it better than I could…
.
“Ziggy really sang, screwed up eyes and screwed down hairdo
Like some cat from Japan, he could lick ’em by smiling
He could leave ’em to hang with his douche sunglasses
Came on so loaded man, well hung and snow white tan, with man boobs and a chest hair reveal…”

7:33 pm April, 12 creature said...

chubby tool who would leave my shoes bloody

7:42 pm April, 12 DarkSock said...

That Rosie O’Donnell really can pull some tail.

8:55 pm April, 12 ehcuodouche said...

She’s just ashamed that his moobs are bigger than hers.

9:51 pm April, 12 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

I’m experiencing cognitive dissonance when seeing a hairy chest with pointy moobs. I reckon she is too.

9:54 pm April, 12 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

That pointy orange thingy sticking out at the side of this picture?
Woof-woof.

9:59 pm April, 12 virility ex said...

These all are looking very amazing which can be one of the great for out side the pictures that can be performed one of the best to know about it.

4:26 am April, 13 Hermit said...

That Danica Patrick can sure pull some man boobs.

6:32 am April, 13 Anonymous said...

I wish I had a pair of Doc Marten’s steel toed boots. I’d like to kick some chiclets down his throat.

6:46 am April, 13 tomato said...

the job app failed to mention that taking drink orders would require linda to make nice with guys that had pointier thingies than she did. nice clothesline for her sunglasses though………………

8:51 am April, 13 CK said...

This guy totally looks like “Typical Chazz” from Funny or Die.

The skit is douche-funny and worth checking out.

But I think that this guy just looks like Chazz and is not actually him.

Here is a clip.. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kJVmpLGjIdE

8:57 am April, 13 Stop, Drop and Mock! said...

^I saw those awhile back and forgot to mention them here. Since I didn’t see a shout out to DB1 in the credits I was figuring he’d be pretty pissed about it and go on a Kanye West sized rant. Alas no such luck. But yeah, Chaz looks like this guy.

9:28 am April, 13 antwar said...

His name is Robert Paulson, his name is Robert Paulson. his hame is Robert Paulson……..

9:33 am April, 13 Boner said...

This guys tits have given me a boner.

3:19 pm April, 13 Banana Hammock said...

@ Anonymous 6:32
How bout some Industrial Docs, nice and broken in? They should work nicely as a dental appliance. Maybe she can borrow my socks, y’know; for that boob lift we are all wishing she had invested daddy’s money in…

4:24 pm April, 13 Robert Latchford said...

This guy looks like a poker player i’ve seen on the circuit who is a complete tosser Luke Schwartz is his handle!

8:44 pm April, 13 Stephanie said...

V-Neck mint green shirts don’t help you,one bit. Your girl should be wearing the glasses and the shirt.

11:49 am April, 14 summers eve said...

Wow i didnt think sloan could do worse than E but i stand corrected

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