Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Caption This

“Jerome hacked and wheezed in great heaving spasms in hopes that his feigned choking episode would again result in his blonde friend attempting the “Hind Lick” maneuver.”

Alllllright. That sucked. Perhaps: “...and with one final swat of Cindy’s palm, the plastic baby head shot out of Tyrone’s colon with an audible *pop* and plinked directly into the middle of the punch bowl in front of the cabana. Red team wins again!

Sorry. Final attempt: “Cursing her ill-advised attempt at amateur colonoscopies, Tina pummeled Drew’s backside in a futile attempt to get her VHS camcorder back out.

There.  I have set the bar.  On the floor, perhaps, but still…Bring Forth The Mock, dear friends, as always – in the “comments” section.

# posted by Bagnonymous
1:11 pm May, 24 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

“Thank you Sir, may I have another.”

1:11 pm May, 24 Vin Douchal said...

They said he had a butt like a horse so Darksock ………

1:12 pm May, 24 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

“How can you have any pudding if you don’t find your crack?”

1:13 pm May, 24 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Jerome misunderstood the goings on at a three way.

1:14 pm May, 24 Vin Douchal said...

Jerome took one last draw from his gasper and stuck it between Katie’s exposed toes … it was time to receive the strap-on to pay off his bet, dry of course

1:14 pm May, 24 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Hold on as long as you can. You’ll feel some cramps and then you’ll be all cleaned out.

1:14 pm May, 24 Mr. Belvadouche said...

while the inadvertent shocker may have been forced from a mandatory cig hold, Tyrel knew that this gesture may be misconstrued

1:15 pm May, 24 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

First, we must apply the lotion.

1:18 pm May, 24 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

“Help a Brotha Out Day” at Mistress Nicole’s Foot Worship and Prostate Exam Clinic.

1:19 pm May, 24 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Would you like that enema shaken or stirred?

1:19 pm May, 24 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

Brotha-bag Darnell bowed down to the great god Vaginitis in silent prayer as he hoped the $1500 he blew on the cabana with bottle service would pay off with at least a hummer from a hott.

1:19 pm May, 24 DoucheyWallnuts said...

“After three years in prison, when Tyson was propositioned by the bleeth to have sex, he was momentarily confused and resorted to his old ways.”

1:20 pm May, 24 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Multiracial Cabana Twister.

1:21 pm May, 24 Mr. Belvadouche said...

Tyrel knew the discount cabana pass he bought from his cousin seemed too good to be true

1:21 pm May, 24 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I hope the Bloods don’t find out about this!

1:23 pm May, 24 Mr. Belvadouche said...

While normal bags only “run with the goose”, Tyrel has decided to step it up a notch and “ram with the goose”

1:25 pm May, 24 Vin Douchal said...

BTW did any of you puck fans see Tim Thomas make that un-fucking-believable save last night on that giant cheap shot douchebag, Steve Downie?
.
Amazing. Go B’s
.

1:26 pm May, 24 Troy Tempest said...

Darryl knew the only way to save her was to perform mouth to mouth resuscitation of her ankle.

Now, your infusion of surrealism for your viewing pleasure:

1:27 pm May, 24 Organic Alpaca Nutrition said...

This year the Alpaca and Llama Breeders Association’s annual convention was held in beautiful Las Vegas. There were daily demonstrations and seminars throughout this educational and fun-filled week.
.
The libations were flowing, and the inhibitions were few, as the guests became aquainted with one another.
Here, Carla prepares to demonstrate the techniques used in artificial insemination on Leon, always a good sport, and kind enough to play the role of a panting, frothed- up bitch alpaca in estrus.

1:35 pm May, 24 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Brokeback Cabana

1:39 pm May, 24 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Jerome would later say, “I thought she asked me if I wanted an 18 inch long jelly *donut*”

1:57 pm May, 24 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Darrell immediately dropped to the floor as Sarah rushed to pound his backside. And thus another strutting rendition of “I own your Azzzz” came screeching to a terrible halt as the gold jebus bling flung up off his chest, straight down his wide-open mouth and lodged crossways in his windpipe like some hook in a Perch on one of the Great Lakes.

2:14 pm May, 24 Choad The Douche Sprocket said...

The Dothraki blood line having been compromised by centuries of inbreeding, Prince Butfuciskon’s feeble command to “dothralat anni m’orvikoon” (ride his horse with a whip) was heard by his headless mistresses as: Treat me like the slave pony that I am.

2:14 pm May, 24 Troy Tempest said...

They had just come from the reception for this wedding:
http://tackyweddings.files.wordpress.com/2010/04/caption0429_1.jpg?w=445&h=331

2:37 pm May, 24 creature said...

“I like it slow at first”

2:38 pm May, 24 creature said...

Deentreme was eager to start as Shestrapla positioned herself

2:39 pm May, 24 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Greg knew he had to give it his all as he reached the final round of the AXE Cabana Series of Douchebaggery. His mediocre showing in the Bling Toss followed by his crushing defeat in the final round of the brohawk sculpture phase left him with only a slim hope of attaining the title. He knew he would have to winThe Irving Thallbag Lifetime Achievement Award Winners Micturation Human Colostomy Bag competition to achieve his dream. Greg is shown here preparing by having Mandy tenderizing his ass with a jar of olives before inserting the fire hose.

2:39 pm May, 24 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

@Vin
.
Yes I did. Gotta be Bruins-Canucks in this run of epic series.

2:43 pm May, 24 Medusa Oblongata said...

At the Playpen auditions for the next Laundry Gimp and Mop Bitch.

2:51 pm May, 24 creature said...

“does the white girl hafta watch?”

2:52 pm May, 24 creature said...

he was buns up kneeling…

3:01 pm May, 24 Troy Tempest said...

Janet said “Dwayne – you have to take your pants off if you want me to peg your stupid ass.”

3:04 pm May, 24 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

“How else am I gonna put a cap in yo ass?”

3:06 pm May, 24 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

@ Medusa
.
I’m imagined A LOT more leather and ball gags for the auditions. Are you and Mr. White going “soft” these days?

3:11 pm May, 24 I R A Darth Aggie said...

Sadly, Jerome lost the bet, and was getting into position to receive two strapons: on in front, and one in back. Jerome was hoping that some KY would be available.
.
Jerome would be sorely disappointed…

3:14 pm May, 24 Et Tu Douche? said...

Surprised no has mentioned this yet but boobies facing Jerome are quite succulent & firm.
.
@Vin
When Thomas is on he can be next to impossible to score on. Go B’s and I concur with the Rev B’s v Nuk’s would be a great series

3:28 pm May, 24 dbBen said...

“11 Years of wretched, degrading pornography proved to be far too much of a build-up for ‘The Event'”.

if you press your nose into the couch in the cabana, you can smell the ocean, typically at low tide.

7:28 pm May, 24 Medusa Oblongata said...

Is that a peace sign on her tit or a pretzel?

7:47 pm May, 24 Guid is Good said...

Since Jerome started working in gay porn he was increasingly bringing work home with him.

8:21 pm May, 24 Maxim Kovalenko said...

The fortune teller looked up from her cards and proclaimed: ” I see pegging in your future.”

8:40 pm May, 24 Baron Von Goolo said...

“Red Team wins again.”
BWA-HA-HA-HA-HAAAAA!!!!!

4:26 am May, 26 Collaz B.Popped said...

What a brother gotta come to?

Pathetic.

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