Thursday, May 26, 2011

HCwDB After Hours: Floral Pear

Enjoy the visual bouquet set before you.

I hope you like daisies; due to this being a family-oriented site I was unable to show you her tulips.



sorry…

EDIT: From my walkabout, your humble narrator checks in, but alas I must replace ‘Sock’s pic with a slightly more work friendly Pear for those hunters reading at work. For those seeking the original Floral Pear, Pear Away. My sherpa is angry with me. I must repent by self-flaggelating with yak hooves and bamboo….

# posted by Bagnonymous
7:03 pm May, 26 MC 900 Foot Douchebag said...

Tulips are my FAVORITE!!!!

7:29 pm May, 26 Sergeant Scrote Stain said...

‘Sock, you have a one track mind.

.

And I sincerely appreciate it.

.

One man. One Dream. The Pursuit of Pee, Pears and Horses. Darksock.

.

Consistency is an admirable quality. At least, that’s what Ted Bundy said.

8:08 pm May, 26 Douchble Helix said...

Chief, maybe you’d better take a look at some of them other pears, starting with I Can’t Believe She’s Not Buttered, which was like, yesterday.
.
Oddly though, I don’t recall any complaints from the peanut gallery.

8:14 pm May, 26 Sergeant Scrote Stain said...

Douchble Helix, don’t ruin this for me.

8:30 pm May, 26 Douchble Helix said...

You are sooo right, SSS.

8:40 pm May, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Wow! That was a late one. Mr. Sock is a testicle to his position, a man among means. A powerplay fighting machine. A lover of tulip and those are some nice tulips. Thank you for posing Nancy Dreuche. You should be able two get some dates with those flaps. Yowsa!
.
On a serious note, has anyone ever enjoyed the game of indoor campfire. The kind of celebration you have when everybody is just asleep and you start collecting all the old newspapers with the bullshit stories the Man keeps throwing at you for $5.95 a week. Then you figure, who needs the fucking drums anymore, anyway, they burn. Then you sit your dog outside while everyone is asleep and get it really stoned. It takes a lot for a 110 pound lean old pussycat golden with a bad hip to get stoned these doys.And you get out your old pill bottles. Is there any use trying to beat the addiction or has big pharma destroyed your life. Might as well get that last buzz on. Toke on another stogey. Drink another six beers and get it done with. I never thought of that either.
.
I’d like to tickle that girls daisies the same way Hermit likes to pluck the Black Eyed Susans every day at around 2:55 when school gets out in the afternoon on sunshiny days at Mother St. Xavier’s School for Dirty Legal Bitches. I’d like to fold her little petal the way Dark Sock likes a muddie springtime field and the smell of Mint Juleps as he prepares himself for thoroughbred micturation we shall not speak of. I’d like to ram her pistles with my man spear the way Medusa and Mr. White and Dr. Bunsen and Creature have their dirty talk about tattoos and dungeons and shit and piss and other Europeeing inyourendos.
.
Now I am really stoned. So Obama tells the Isreali’s that shit. Really.
.

.
I was wondering if anyone else thinks that DB1 and Dark Sock are the same person. Or, if all you are one person and I am a prisoner in my office with the rare escape of a laugh, a joke, a hillybulloo if you know what I’s saying. Chinese girls are a total gas man. Like a tornado in my pants. Too soon? Or am I all the characters in the escape, nay, this broadway performance we put on at a momments notice. A Comedy of Errors: If I may? A soupcon of satire at a winsome base level. Comeraderie od Courvosiers. I don’t know what the fuck I’m talking about but I may go watch Tv if the fire stays out. Son.
.
That fucking Stevie Nicks was one hot slut back in the 70’s, man. She was a clonazepam addict too. Five times my dose for half the time I was on it. She was in-patient for a year. Bad shit man. But the weed is a wonder at fighting that demon. So is the booze. I have a new rehab plan to have two for every one addiction you had to take your mind off of it. Wow! I just realized that I was really addicted to a few things. I’ll drink to that, Son.
.

.

8:44 pm May, 26 Douchble Helix said...

Do we need to an intervention or something? I mean, do we just sit back and watch whatever it is?
.
I’m cool either way. I just like to bring the issues up. Sometimes that’s the hardest part.

8:51 pm May, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

HHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAahaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! I like FFFFFFFFLLLLLLLLAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPS!!!!!!!
.
Well we might have seen one half of a flap DS/DB???

9:05 pm May, 26 creature said...

shingles are a helluvan ailment

9:29 pm May, 26 Nancy Dreuche said...

Thanks for the kudos Rev, but it wasn’t me.
@Douchble Helix um yeah, the man is on his own planet. Is this what a midlife crises is like in words? Good to know.

9:42 pm May, 26 Vin Douchal said...

Yeah. I send a lot of pears in to Db1 that get posted and I try to keep it PG13-y.
.
Doesn’t mean I’m not on< websites where the barking starfish is staring you down and you can smell the lingering methane surrounded by meaty muffins o' pear ….
.

.
@ the good Rev
.
RE: I was wondering if anyone else thinks that DB1 and Dark Sock are the same person
.
I was thinking that too for awhile. Kind of like Db1 is the guy working the Hollywood angle trying to find the broad audience so he keeps it tight and clever but not over the line….. and Darksock as his twisted alter ego, able to let fly under the different moniker.

But the amount of work the Sockster’s been putting in this week combined with the 75 million websites with ” I peed in a horse once” makes me think Darksock is a consortium of 3, maybe more people riffing while a terribly haggard typist puts it all on the record forever in the interwebs.
.
Or not

9:44 pm May, 26 creature said...

^he’s a savant

9:45 pm May, 26 creature said...

DSock that is…DB1 is just the boss…guy with a few good ideas!

9:47 pm May, 26 Ted Brogan said...

Game over. I’m out. Anything else will be disappointing.

9:50 pm May, 26 Ted Brogan said...

As awesome as this post is, it’s sort of bittersweet.

9:51 pm May, 26 Ted Brogan said...

How does one follow up to it?

9:53 pm May, 26 soy bomb said...

I always thought DarkSock was Marilyn Manson.

10:47 pm May, 26 Darksock said...

One pear over the line, sweet Jeebus;
One pear over the line…

.
It’s a fair cop…

10:54 pm May, 26 army (ret) douche said...

looks like no xmas bonus for you this year, DS

12:21 am May, 27 Steve L. said...

y’know for late night HCwDB viewers always having a pear at the top of the page ain’t a bad thing at all.
just saying.

12:31 am May, 27 Edith Anne Tarbox of Dripping Springs Tx said...

my bentley plum
my mercedes pear
i’m lookin for a freak momma
to take me there.

maybe darksock, lil wayne and db1 are all the same person?

4:40 am May, 27 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Reverend Chad’s post must be enshrined in the HOF immediately.
.
DB1 is all of us, all of us is DB1.

5:27 am May, 27 Collaz B. Popped said...

Douchey, absolutely.

I also thought thought that was Nancy Dreuche showing us her pear,,,my bad.

Mind boggling pear posts this week.

5:59 am May, 27 I R A Darth Aggie said...

Daisy: $0.50
Paint: $20.00
Two Pear in one post: Priceless.

8:51 am May, 27 mr.reeve said...

Both pears work. And by work I mean boner……….

10:07 am May, 27 jonezy said...

yea, but if DB1 is DarkSock, then who the fuck is FLYTEETH?
.
Chew on that TARMAL!

2:55 pm May, 27 The Dude said...

Can DB1 turn the pool water into wine at Rehab in Vegas? Why bother

Can DB1 shield the full NSFW pear from the eyes of working stiffs across this great land? Sorta

Can DB1 recover from his long overdue sabbatical? Only the faithful will know. Only the douchesciples are privy.

Compared to the true titans of this wonderful site, I’m a summer intern volunteering for Craft Services, so I don’t know shit, but I wouldn’t anyway, on account of I am stoned. Reverend.

Hoho’s anyone?

Leave a Reply

What is 2 + 14 ?
Please leave these two fields as-is:
IMPORTANT! To be able to proceed, you need to solve the following simple math (so we know that you are a human) :-)