Monday, May 9, 2011

Pop Quiz: Jimmy Pud’s Douchetributes

Pop Quiz time, kids.

Which of the following is the douchiest of all the douchetributes on Jimmy Pud:

A. Fake rolex watch

B. 80s sunglasses on a necklace

C. Flannel undies poke in a poolside environment

D. Stupid red gourami fish fauxhawk

E. The fact Mandy’s oh so soft and tender boobage has somehow, due purely to Chaos Theory presumably, wound up pressing into Jimmy Pud’s chest scribble tatt.

Answer now!

# posted by douchebag1
11:41 am May, 9 Medusa Oblongata said...

F. Can of either Icehouse beer, or Diet Soda. I can’t tell, but either way he loses.

11:53 am May, 9 dbBen said...

Fake Rolex. Although the gold that rubs off on the steering wheel of the Neon makes for a cool effect yo.
.
My one solace: Mandy appears to be doing a hover hand.

11:54 am May, 9 Douche Springsteen said...

He looks just like a kid I used to work with when I was in high school and had a job at an ice cream place. Every time a can of whipped cream emptied out he would run in the back room and huff the remnants of nitrous in there for the 20 second high. I wouldn’t be surprised if this was him.
@ Medusa
I believe that is a can of Coors Light, it has the “extra wide” opening which is to make sure the shitty beer can exit the can faster. That is a big selling point for them. It works really well on the hillbilly side of my family.

12:02 pm May, 9 Vin Douchal said...

G. Glory hole space advertising

12:03 pm May, 9 Vin Douchal said...

H. Fat chick in back is his actually girlfriend

12:06 pm May, 9 tall guy said...

Amoozin’ but confoozin’! But It’s way too early here and I haven’t had a second coffee. He’s the type I almost feel sorry for. Take a look at the insecurity on his face. Pty he’s passed the point of no return. Pity for him that is.

12:10 pm May, 9 Stephanie said...

Stupid red gourami fish fauxhawk is tiresome.

12:20 pm May, 9 The Dude said...

For moi, it’s gotta be the red fwip on his head. I’d seriously consider a notta pass it not or that blemish.

12:21 pm May, 9 The Dude said...

f’s ^

12:28 pm May, 9 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Red fauxhawk. Makes me wonder if his other woodpecker is equally flashy.
Both ought to migrate to a far north Canadian woods and disappear for the season.

12:39 pm May, 9 Douchey Lewis and the News said...

@ Medusa…I believe that is a Coors Light can he’s holding. For those pool side guests with a more refined palate.
.
.
The Northern Red Headed Peckerwood is often viewed in it’s poolside habitat.

12:41 pm May, 9 ColorMeDouche said...

Her forehead is so big you could fit rosie o donald in there.

12:44 pm May, 9 Troy Tempest said...

F. His dimwitted grin of self-satisfied entitlement.

12:48 pm May, 9 Claude Douchenbagger said...

All of the above.

12:54 pm May, 9 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

K. If you squint your left eye half way and focus on her, he turns into Will Smith.
.
OK. That’s was stupid. But if you look at her teeth and six head she really does look like that Jada Pinkett and that throws my day right off. Bartender!

1:32 pm May, 9 Et Tu Douche? said...

It’s a trick question, it’s F. The ridiculous frontal tat’s

1:36 pm May, 9 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

F. For all the things we can’t see. Like his ’93 Ford Taurus with the crushed left headlight and the gray body putty still on the back quarter panels that he drove to the party to meet Mandy after finishing his shift at Red Robin where he empties the grease traps and dreams of one day telling his boss to “shove his stupid job up his ass” so that he can leave and play and write songs with his band full time because one day they’ll get gigs better than the one they have in the Shoney’s parking lot in Intercourse PA on Friday nights. And after they make it big, he’ll shwow them all. Yaeh, he’ll show them
.
G. Run on sentences. They totally rule!

1:58 pm May, 9 memphis doucheworkers local 421 said...

The correct answer is D; stupid red gourami fish fauxhawk.

2:21 pm May, 9 creature said...

I wanna store my iphone in Mandy’s trikini….& by iphone I mean my ‘linguisa’ app

4:01 pm May, 9 Nancy Dreuche said...

Fauhawk and Faulex. A douchley combination. I’d watch back to back episodes of the old Pink Panther cartoon on this chick’s 5-head.

5:13 pm May, 9 Oucheday Agbay said...

He’s at 90% douche. To fully complete the process, he’s got to adopt some sort of sneer or kissy face.

5:57 pm May, 9 Mr. Biggs said...

D. Gourami red fish fauxhawk.

Also together with poolside undie poke, chest tatt and sunglasses he gets triple douche score tic-tac-toe combo. Good on ya mate!

8:06 pm May, 9 DarkSock said...

M. Dessicated Baboon Labia Necklace. Which is also the name of his shitty hipster band that got a small paragraph and 7-star rating in a 2009 issue of Spin Magazine (Motto: “If It Fails To Rock, We’ll Suckle It’s Peen!”).

8:56 pm May, 9 Steve L. said...

Jane Largewoman at the back disapproves.
.
sorry.

9:00 pm May, 9 Steve L. said...

no. i’m… really… deeply…
sorry.

9:03 pm May, 9 Steve L. said...

oh and i choose C because i’m totally uncreative today.

10:27 pm May, 9 The Dude said...

D. de D.

Dee d’Dee!

Done.

10:32 pm May, 9 The Dude said...

oh and thank god for Nancy Dreuche @4.01pm

Faurever shall Faulex be the brand!

2:41 am May, 10 Kamagra said...

I have not had a second coffee. He is the type I almost feel sorry for. Take a look at the uncertainty over his face. Pty he passed the point of no return.

4:54 am May, 10 Collaz B. Popped said...

Monthly?

This guy has got it all goin’ on yo…

I can assure you He’s a “drummer” – that cannot keep time/a steady beat whatsofuckingever.

4:55 am May, 10 Collaz B. Popped said...

C. Because Flannel underwear showing under poolside garment is as bad as a popped collar.

7:02 am May, 10 I R A Darth Aggie said...

F. All of the above.

1:20 pm May, 10 Douchble Helix said...

I don’t deny the evidence. And yet, I wanna give him a pass. He looks like every kid today. He’s smiling properly with his bangin’ gf. They’re at a pool where he’s supposed to be dressed more or less like that. JFC, maybe I’m losing my mind, but I give this kid the benefit of the doubt.

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