Monday, May 23, 2011
Thumbs McGee Voted; have you?
Well, unfortunately, Thumbs McGee from yesterday’s Sunday Suite did find a use for his thumb: mashing the “VOTE” button for this week’s DoucheBag O’ The Week.
If this simian simpleton can manage it, so can you.
Keep mashing that vote button, Thumbs; as long as you’re doing that you can’t apply rotation to the sugar plum(s).
Because allowing such a douche/hott coupling would be the equivalent of Osama Bin Laden pushing a warm corn dog into the butt of Lady Justice.
Not on our watch.
Not with our corn dog.
He’s pushing the button on his prostate, hence the face. “Vote early and often”, says Thumbs.
Thumbs looks like a mentally challenged weasel staring at a pair of headlights.
Thumbs’ favorite planet is “Your Anus”
Thumbs’ dog is named Dew Claw. They sniff each other’s asses
Thumb’s has a part time job checking prostates at the retirement home
Thumbs likes old school turn signals.
I’d vote the hott on the right early and often. Yes, baby, this is the butterfly ballot.
Thumb rotates his own wankel with his thumbs. Son.
Thumbs’ favorite baseball player is Q. McCracken. He likes the guys to hit triples.
Thumbs can run faster than a spooked toddler, just on his two thumbs.
^link fail…OK, forward to the 1 minute 07 second mark, then.
^ I get it.
.
Solitaire reads that Thumbs has a bum opposable penis. Skaramanga!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Where’s Hermit?
Thumbs wanders the Earth, desperately trying to steal chromosomes from humans to try to get his count up to normal.
Wasn’t this guy in Spy Kids?
They say what separates primates from lower animals is the opposable thumb. In this case, it’s also a developed frontal cortex. Sorry, Thumbs, one out of two ain’t bad.
Rev 12:43,
I was on my way to your place for my extended stay, but the Marxo-Facists at the border refused to let me enter with my Uzi, Conway Twitty cassettes and collection of alpaca urine.
I’m stuck here in the lower 48 until I can find a way to sneak through.
.
.
Keep that Eskimo bitch warmed up for me.
Sorry, Hermit: the U.S. Borders are well known for being impenetrable.
.
.
Wait, you’re trying to get out?
.
Am I in Canada?
.
You just jellied my mind, Brah.
finally – a Frank Zappa reference. Thank you for recognizing the USA’s most incredible composer.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JTD1QW3SM60&feature=related . If you don’t find God in this video get a PO Box and I’lla send you some learning materials. Son.
I noticed that quarter tone disclaimer a few threads back .