Friday, June 17, 2011

Friday Haiku

The Bald Peen Hammer
Hangs tough; can’t see Todd’s merkin
Forgotten on scalp…

Hey baby. You all
Kinds of hot. Want to feel my
Big scoliosis.

– The Reverend Chad Kroeger

Making kissylips
Won’t disguise reality
Male pattern baldness

– ehcuodouche

DNA mixed with
Gnat , baboon and buzzard genes
Produced his hairpiece

– Vin Douchal

Hi, I’m a salesman
at the Des Moines Hot Topic
I can’t afford you.

– Mandouchian Candidate

Hairline receding
Trent vowed “Screw Hair Club for Men”
Sports squirrel instead.

– Mr. Scrotato Head

On a quick set break
Fluffer and his assistant
Discuss his techniques.

– Wedgie

# posted by Bagnonymous
7:03 am June, 17 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Hey baby. You all
Kinds of hot. Want to feel my
Big scoliosis.

7:04 am June, 17 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

So, I got nuthin’
For this bald, goggled douchebag.
And his tepid hott.

7:05 am June, 17 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Always in stealth mode.
The Curveback Razorhead stalks
His prey with his wang.

7:08 am June, 17 Colossus of Choads said...

Doucheapithecus,
with symbiant head slug,
God’s cruel mistake.

7:10 am June, 17 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Armed with his orange
Wings. The Angel of Douche comes
In for a landing.

7:10 am June, 17 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Vin Diesel chills out
After Fast Five movie wrap.
Needs fast rap to skull.

7:11 am June, 17 Mandouchian Candidate said...

Bald guy grinds on hot.
She knows Her zipper open;
repels bugs, not choads.

7:11 am June, 17 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

She had not see him
Yet when green ferns began to
Grow from top of head.

7:12 am June, 17 ehcuodouche said...

Making kissylips
Won’t disguise reality
Male pattern baldness

7:13 am June, 17 Al Paccah said...

Kimmy cant escape
The Last of the Choad-hicans
He’ll poke her hontas

7:13 am June, 17 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

My name is Two Dogs.
How bout I buy us some drinks
At my casino.

7:13 am June, 17 Mandouchian Candidate said...

Hunchback of Vegas
Stupid male pattern baldness
Fauxhawk retarded.




dollarmenunaires

7:14 am June, 17 ehcuodouche said...

Posture challenged bag
Can’t quite call it a mohawk
More like a sundial

7:15 am June, 17 saulgoode42 said...

The Choad Warrior
Takes a break from running gas
To ruin some ass

7:15 am June, 17 Mandouchian Candidate said...

8 dollar haircut
65 dollar hooker
90 dollar rash

7:17 am June, 17 Vin Douchal said...

DNA mixed with
Gnat , baboon and buzzard genes
Produced his hairpiece

7:17 am June, 17 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

The smile hides the truth.
The warm hidden truth that she
Just shat in her pants.

7:19 am June, 17 Mandouchian Candidate said...

chicks fucking dig me
cuz my hairline is higher
than your low standards

7:19 am June, 17 Vin Douchal said...

This pose with bald dope
Her parents very happy
Lost inheritence

7:19 am June, 17 saulgoode42 said...

Peg’s bra, lace & jeans
Are probably more suited
For “Poorly Dressed” site

7:20 am June, 17 Vin Douchal said...

Are people laughing
And pointing behind his back
No doubt about it

7:23 am June, 17 Mandouchian Candidate said...

Hi, I’m a salesman
at the Des Moines Hot Topic
I cannot afford you.

7:24 am June, 17 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Botanist Blondie’s
Always searching for new species.
Finds the ten-toed sloth.

7:25 am June, 17 Cool Hand Douche said...

A rare sighting, class:
hip humping mating rite of
Homo Foreheadus

7:28 am June, 17 Mandouchian Candidate said...

Blonde in lacy top,
something is wrong with her ass
It’s not in my mouth.

7:29 am June, 17 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

New Chili Pepper,
Plea, out on day parole with
Sister. Has no clue.

7:31 am June, 17 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Hip crotch Sally
Enjoys public banging from side.
MonkeyBoy. Says Groooooooooo.

7:33 am June, 17 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Hairline receding
Trent vowed “Screw Hair Club for Men”
Sports squirrel instead.

7:34 am June, 17 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Lisa Loopner’s dad
shows the strain of his disease.
So blonde holds him up.

7:34 am June, 17 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Reconstructed face
Gives another chance. Want to
See my big Weiner.

7:35 am June, 17 The Fourth Horseman of the Douchepocalypse said...

Neanderthal head
Hunched over hott. Tries to form words:
“Me like the boobies!”

7:36 am June, 17 Cool Hand Douche said...

Mandible Mowgli
Unzips Suzy Crotchrot’s shorts
Discovers testes.

7:37 am June, 17 Claude Douchenbagger said...

The last merkhegan
Tests pale face woman by sniff
Then passes mustard

7:38 am June, 17 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

life prospects fading
Trent sags under weight of fail
Ponders groin shave, tatts

7:40 am June, 17 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Ingrid just can’t leave.
Her love is of a rare kind.
It’s Stockholm Syndrome.

7:40 am June, 17 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Its not a forehead
Not even a five head. Pfft!
Make way for Ten-Head

7:42 am June, 17 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Scoliosis Wins!
Can’t go wrong with med humor.
Nice one there, Rev’run!

7:47 am June, 17 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

She’s pretty all right.
But hanging with this guy. Her
Breath smells like bad cock.

7:51 am June, 17 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Hating comb over
Trent opts for hip, younger look
Fuzzy Red Skidmark

7:54 am June, 17 Cool Hand Douche said...

Suzy shows classic
Sign of third-stage syphilis
Massive Hip chancre

7:57 am June, 17 Et Tu Douche? said...

At a loss for words
Cabana pool baggery
Wrist band faux hawk fail

8:04 am June, 17 Mandouchian Candidate said...

I imagine her mouth,
much like her lace covered breasts
have seen many cocks.

8:05 am June, 17 Mandouchian Candidate said...

Shiver me timbers
That chick has a hemmorhoid
the size of brad pitt.

8:06 am June, 17 Mandouchian Candidate said...

Shiver me timbers
That chick has a hemmorhoid
that works at BK.

8:11 am June, 17 boone doggle said...

bicycle, scooter
a red tailed squirrel photobomb
aw, why squirrel hate me?

8:13 am June, 17 Wedgie said...

On a quick set break
Fluffer and his assistant
Discuss his techniques.

8:16 am June, 17 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Shelly hits the pool
Sporting Plinky’s Mom’s lace thong
And bonus fetus!

8:19 am June, 17 DarkSock said...

Pouting Ben Affleck
Casino Heist movie set:
“MuleDeer Games – Part 2”

8:20 am June, 17 DarkSock said...

This Mohawk Moron
Violates personal space
What a dumb hobby

8:32 am June, 17 DarkSock said...

I’d watch Medusa
Donkey-Punch his empty skull,
Tongue-punch her fart box

8:39 am June, 17 Banana Hammock said...

Mid aged Yum prep’d to maul
Toilet slime Todd’s only inquire
“Why did she get the pink bracelet?”

8:39 am June, 17 DarkSock said...

Meanwhile, yet another substantive news story being willfully ignored by the Lame Stream Media:
.
NEWS IN BRIEF
Report: Typical City Bus Contains No Fewer Than Four Erections At Any Given Time

    JUNE 17, 2011 | ISSUE 47•24
    .
    WASHINGTON—A report from the U.S. Department of Transportation confirmed Thursday that at any one time, the average American city bus is occupied by at least four fully erect penises. “This persistent level of physical arousal remains a mystery, as we have found no link between these erections and either the attractiveness of fellow passengers or the intensity of vehicle vibrations,” the report read in part, also noting that when one of the four engorged penises goes flaccid, another immediately hardens, as if to take its place. “Four is just a minimum, of course. During rush-hour traffic, there may be as many as 21 stiffened members on a single bus, while off-peak erection counts often hover around five or even six.” The report’s statistics do not include bus drivers, who are believed to remain constantly erect throughout their shifts.

8:58 am June, 17 Mandouchian Candidate said...

he smells of taint stains
she smells of ball sweat and jizz
tornado of sleaze

8:59 am June, 17 Mandouchian Candidate said...

Is that sam’rai scrote?
Hairline further back each day,
long thread in the works?

9:03 am June, 17 Nancy Dreuche said...

^I needs to ride the bus!

9:08 am June, 17 Nancy Dreuche said...

Sorry,
.
.
I needs to ride the
Bus, based on DarkSocks latest
News story Daa-yum

9:17 am June, 17 Troy Tempest said...

Scoliosis Sam
thinks he is samurai scrote
but he is just poo

10:45 am June, 17 Anonymous said...

Hair puff sings Pink Floyd:
“There’s no pain, I’m receding”
Comfortably Dumb

*

I feel sorry for
His hair. It’s not receding,
it’s running away!

11:58 am June, 17 Mr. Biggs said...

Can we now agree?
Pool cabana backdrops are
An addoucherement.

9:07 pm June, 22 JC said...

I know this guy and he is cool as hell. One of the top five Djs in Vegas. Not a douche for sure!!!

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