Friday, June 24, 2011
Friday Haiku
Technicolor vag
And Loony Toons torso man
Put the “ink” in “stink”
– DS
Pregnancy ruins
gunt tatt for dopey bleeth chick.
Scribbles doesn’t care.
– Troy Tempest
Rising from her taint
Like a Phoenix from Ashes
The ashes are crabs
– jonezy
Plastic gears and rings
Tattoo needle attachment
Hasbro Spirograph
– Vin Douchal
Newspaper boy has
Religion and Comics. Sports
Results go to page taint.
– The Reverend Chad Krœger
Her vajayjay looks
Like it just self tossed its own
Salad. Now that’s art!
– Nancy Dreuche
The key to her heart,
I hope I never find it.
Let Ink Floyd have her
Yesteryear Flashback!
These two ‘Silly Putty’ mounds
Take prints from comics.
.
.
.(Now who gets this?)
Turtleneck Tatt Douche
Has one thing in common with
the virgin mary
Moses O..Moses!
Pharoah has forsaken ye.
Tattoed Yul besmirks
Could you imagine
explaining this to your kids?
Wait, must be sterile.
Chrome Dome Tat Sleeve Dude
I’m all party in tne front.
Magna Carta rear.
Gary Guttenberg.
Man of ink develops ” Lee
Press On Skin For Men”
Money shot tattoo
Full body art circus clown
Medussa just puked
What a Christian Douche
Even the Virgin Mary
is wearing Bling
Oh mighty God Ra
Why hast thee cast me out with
Papyrus Rash.
Dr. Evil’s plan:
Take over world with gross out
Make everyone sick!
Seriously though
How would you explain these tatts
to a five year old?
Pregnancy ruins
gunt tatt for dopey bleeth chick.
Scribbles doesn’t care.
Ahoy. Captain Kirk!
That Romulan dude with Red
Matter’s at it again.
Rising from her taint
Like a Phoenix from Ashes
The ashes are crabs
Shit covered morons
wait to get to the front of
unemployment line.
Douche has named his breasts
Lorenzo and Occorso.
Begs Titty-Twister.
That Kelli Pickler
Sure has gone downhill. What the
Hell is a Lobster?
Key shaped locket
The key is to be a douche
Unlocks vag tat heart
I spent more money
on all these sweet ass tattoos
than i make yearly.
She voted for bush
He is a head in the polls
Poly-ticks is right
Where she touches him
Her Flora blooms. That there’s some
mean bacteria!
Agent Orange is
High level operative.
Holds Al Capone’s map.
Plastic gears and rings
Tattoo needle attachment
Hasbro Spirograph
For my next act. The
Virgin will appear to birth
Jesus while I fart.
Tat Showcase Showdown
How much did all those tats cost?
Spay and Neuter them
^spirograph
Wait, I’ve seen this one:
American Gothic-meets
Tatted-up weirdos
Intense stare at lense
Is it ink caused confidence?
No, constipation
@Franklin D.D.
.
Those were good times before the shit got sent from China and newspapers were made with oil based ink.
Dearest Mom & Dad,
She’s not quite circus-worthy
But can I keep her?
Her tattoo ends at
Writing on her labia
“Toxic Area”
Mine eyes have seen the
Gory of these horrible
Tattoos. Ink-stained hell.
Mark tests his concept
At beach. Sadly, no one buys
his Retch-A-Sketch tool
Mister John Cusuck
researches role as tatt bag
don’t Say Anything
Newspaper boy has
Religion and Comics. Sports
Results go to page taint.
@ Rev CK
We’re Old Shits, Son.
Ed Hardy party
Salad in her pants. He
Only likes his tossed.
I am not her dad
But HOLY CHRIST that’s FUCKED UP
Imma kill that punk!
Many years later
Mini Me gets growth spurt. But
can’t cure bad sex rash.
Lane Meyer gone bad.
Paper boy wants two dollars.
Lane will pay with sex.
In our near future.
Zoo visitors look down on
The Last Choad Standing
They make me weep that
This is first sober morning
In years. Time to drink.
Her vajayjay looks
Like it just self tossed its own
Salad. Now that’s art!
Walking Magic Eye
Pic No one has ever Seen it
Staring Causes Puke
Damn Rev got in a tossed salad joke before me. Guess you got to get up pretty early in the morning to win around here.
You think this looks bad?
Imagine these two ‘Bags at
Eighty! Induce Heave!!
Brendan Fraser just
Refused script for. The Mummy:
Regurgitation.
His Chest Hides Schooner
Mary is Just Distraction
Fight though Nausea
Spent All On Tattoos
Now Must Ask Mom For Advance
On My Allowance
Telly Savalas
Fails Dirty Dozen spinoff:
“Filthy Dirty Duo”
Staggering are the
Odds that I just sharted and it
Looks just like his chest.
.
AAAMMMEEEENNNN
Mister Clean will clean
Your house till everything is
Shining. Or you barf….
The powers that be
brought these two rejects together
sparing all others
text below vag-tatt
Lasciate ogne speranza
voi ch’intrate
fuckin eight syllables in line 2- idiot!
Props to The Dark Sock,
Hark! He peed in a horse once,
And now runs Haiku.
.
– management
Self- disqualification. Posted Haiku is a Noku. 5-7-6
@Rev 8:16a, change it to “Scores go to page taint” and you’re golden again.
I’m wearing dark socks
So my feet won’t see these tatts
Need to cleanse palette
I’d rather see the horse
Dark Sock peed in than these two
Tragic tattoo-ines!
these human cavas
cry for new category
bad life choices hall
her O B moonlights
as Disney animator
Blondie sports ‘cunttoon’
‘Cunttoon’ is my new
Favorite word of them all
Now what do I say?
.
.
Ha ha ha ha ha
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Ha ha ha ha…ha
‘Tainttoo’ works also
My girlnecologist says
“Back to work, you fuck!”
They work as butt swabs
In proctologist’s office;
Tonetta’s doctor…
no coincidence
these two met at carnival
tunnel of loathe
Rubbing together
Or bumping uglies, these two
Create douche-i-tude
DSFTW
she, “I’m on the rag”
he, “let’s do it anyway”
result, rorschach test
heart vag looks like
monkeys red ass
stoopid tats, rooster vomit
Yikes Stephanie, its 5-7-5, not 4-4-7. Stick to telling us who has the best weed and non-sequiters.
Good God DB1
Are you too lazy to run
Haiku Friday now?
Neither of us will
Ever hold a job that pays
Ten dollars an hour
the face of Black Death
in European Dark Ages.
a frightening sight.
Total fuccen gold,
all these haiku! Maybe I
shouldn’t work Fridays.
Head tats incomplete
stolen by viral coochie
Gotta buy some more
Chick’s tattoos ain’t tats.
It’s fungus, grown in forest
no man returns from