Thursday, July 7, 2011

Envyus is Made Out of Plastic, Is Glad to Meet You

Plasticdouches posing as humans? Pretty sure Envyus was actually a villain from the old Doctor Who.

Both Katie and Vanessa are candy corn sunshine slappy slap drinks of sex salve carnal carnation butt bouquets, and so I salute their genetic ancestors with the ritual burning of fruitfly incense and awkward tree humping.

# posted by douchebag1
9:36 am July, 7 boone doggle said...

bewbs. time for lunch.

9:41 am July, 7 Chris in 'Baghdad said...

I like the subtle necklace bling…and the subtle tatts. The guy’s body looks like a newspaper put together by a blind person.

9:44 am July, 7 Et Tu Douche? said...

Magilla Gorilla has graced these pages before, actually several times. Nice jugs though.

9:48 am July, 7 Et Tu Douche? said...

He is one half of the The Greasepitz.

9:50 am July, 7 Nancy Dreuche said...

@Et Tu, I concur. I may be bad with names but I never forget a face. Especially when’s its attached to a greasy lamely tatted up body. This douche is a professional entertainer. I think he got more tatts though since the last time he was pictured here. His dancing career must really be taking off. Good for him!
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HOH for these two. Make it so.

9:51 am July, 7 Bigphatnotadouche said...

The Hotts are Hott.
The Douche is a Douche.
I just wanted to state the obvious for those watching at home.

9:51 am July, 7 Vin Douchal said...

This guy is so shitty. What an asshole. And these two gals look like the type that I would have absolutely nothing to talk about, which is the exact reason older guys like fucking prostitutes….. takes the headache out of it if you can toss a few bucks to nut
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BTW , The Pappa Squatter and Matt Musto threads were the funniest fuccen riffs we’ve had here this year.

9:52 am July, 7 Fatness said...

Nothing in the photo is natural.

9:53 am July, 7 Nancy Dreuche said...

His right pec tatt is detailed instructions on how to locate his cornhole in case of an emergency.

10:01 am July, 7 Hermit said...

The words Envyus’ right shoulder tattoo is the Preamble to the Constitution……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

10:01 am July, 7 Hermit said...

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….of Homoslavia.

10:02 am July, 7 Fatness said...

Gotta think that the funbags on blue are about like bouncing on a cheap Wal*Mart air bed.

10:03 am July, 7 DarkSock said...

“Pooper or plastic?”

10:10 am July, 7 Vin Douchal said...

Is this guy a douche?
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10:19 am July, 7 MrEvilBreakfast said...

I wonder how many roofies he managed to slip into their drinks to A) get them to pose in that picture and B) smile.

Though, there’s something off about Katie’s smile. Like she’s standing too close to a pit bull on heat with a spiked barb shoved up it’s ass.

Or that she realizes her drink just ain’t right….

Either way what a DOUCHE.

11:15 am July, 7 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

^Guitar Tube. Funny clown.
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Those girls are awesome. I would leave my family for the one on the right. What?

11:16 am July, 7 baleen said...

Donnie Osmond Douche

12:21 pm July, 7 army (ret) douche said...

i second ND’s Call to vote for the HOH. though it really was more of a demand… minor details

1:05 pm July, 7 tall guy said...

Are they twins? Well, der, the boobies are… But I meant are the hotts twins? Anyway, I quite like lefty, although she’d need delousing after standing so close to that upright newsagency. I think the call for HoH is a bit ambitious though. Also, quick vox-pop: is (buying and subsequently driving) a sports car douche? I mean, it looks to be a good investment in a throw a tarpaulin over it and wait for its value to appreciate-kinda way.

1:22 pm July, 7 The Dude said...

Nice boobules. Why climb those mountains? Because they’re bare.

1:24 pm July, 7 The Dude said...

Envyus might just be a nice guy who accidentally walked into a printing press.

1:43 pm July, 7 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

The best thing about this pic is that you can easily crop out Envyus and deposit the hotts into the spank bank. One of the best submission in a long time for hotts.

2:18 pm July, 7 I R A Darth Aggie said...

I hope the douche is the only artificial boob in that picture…you are so giving me The Eye, Tube Top Hott.

8:46 pm July, 7 Steve L. said...

“sex salve carnal carnation” FTFM (for the furious masturbation)

8:52 pm July, 7 Steve L. said...

and Envyus FT…

eh there are too many ways with which i want to badly maim this douchebag that a complete compilation of desired maiming methods won’t fit very well into a “for the” catchphrase.

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