Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Old Man Moe

Old Man Moe could just be an aging sessions rocker. However, Perfect Suckle Chomp Salina stepped from the pages of a hormonal teenager’s most fervered fantasies, and while I should be celebrating the inspirations of her potential persperations, I find my poetic linguistic coitus interruptus.

For the question tasks me: Ski Mask Dude. What’s up?

About to rob the place?

Or just facially cold?

# posted by douchebag1
1:36 pm July, 13 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

My kind of strip club always includes balaclava wearing terrorists drinking girly drinks, satin suited rockers, and sizzling spanish bodies.
.
ROFLMAOLOLZIMHO

1:37 pm July, 13 Anonymous said...

Pic is too wierd……..I got nothin’

1:38 pm July, 13 tall guy said...

Despite (or perhaps in spite of) Salina being almost as orange as a glass of Tang, she’s rocking my morning! Big ole gal=tops! Notta for Old Man Moe, and if anyone’s wondering how ski mask dude got past security he’s, “like, wearing a yellow wrist band!!!!”

1:40 pm July, 13 tall guy said...

“…but he’s not wearing socks!!!!!!”

1:44 pm July, 13 Anonymous said...

SALINA FOR HALL OF HOTT.
MY PENIS THINKS SO TOO.

1:51 pm July, 13 Mandouchian Candidate said...

Yup. Whole lot of weird going on. Carry on.

1:53 pm July, 13 Mandouchian Candidate said...

She is pretty tasty, though, and I think lazy eyed strippers are underrated as a commodity.

1:55 pm July, 13 Vin Douchal said...

Moe looks like a Salvador Dali characature of Jimmy Page
.
Salina has a most spoogable tummy
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Black mask in back is covering up a head wound gauze wrapping, well let’s hope so anyway

1:57 pm July, 13 Hermit said...

Meanwhile, Rev Chad and Buffalo Beast discuss the escalating price of weed in the background.

1:57 pm July, 13 Hermit said...

Or, is that Lenny the Box?

2:00 pm July, 13 Wedgie said...

I always knew the Al Qaeda guys could party. Later, she will be stoned for not wearing a burkha.

2:22 pm July, 13 jonezy said...

hover hand!
.
I think that they may be related in so much as he typically pays for sex and she typically gets payment for sex.
.
Ninja Ned in a fourth samurai removed from Samurai Scrotundea

2:25 pm July, 13 Mad Douchigan said...

Just to clear up… “Ski Mask Dude” is actually wearing a “Skin suit” for burn victims. He has the same black suit all the way to his wrists and the yellow tag is clearly a hospital tag, which he is required to wear for the entire duration of his burn care.

Now if someone will please tell me where this picture was taken I would love to go there and go “blblblblbblblblblblbllb” in Salina’s belly button!!!

2:25 pm July, 13 Troy Tempest said...

Not a ski mask – Moslem female?

2:28 pm July, 13 Troy Tempest said...

Her belly button whistles, too. It whistles “Games Without Frontiers” by Peter Gabriel. Then it farts. But when it farts it smells like kitten farts made of lavender and vanilla. Her belly button is also her second vajaja. Remember – you don’t know life ’til you fuck it in the guts.

2:29 pm July, 13 BigBag said...

Colin Ferrell has really let himself go. And that is the worst ninja ever, letting himself get photographed.

2:36 pm July, 13 Troy Tempest said...

@Bigbag:
.
tinyurl.com
.
use it.

3:20 pm July, 13 memphis doucheworkers local 421 said...

Hall of Hott, provided the stench of Chechnyan mafia bachelor party can be erased.

3:54 pm July, 13 Nancy Dreuche said...

If you look out that window it is clear…they are inside the Matrix. And ski mask dude is with me. I think its more humane than making him wear the paper bag. Well in his case, two paper bags.
.
And yeah this chick for HOH over those last two skanks I nominated. What was I thinking with those last two? Anyway, if this girl can hang and not bat an eyelash in this bizarro world she’s got my stamp of approval.

4:18 pm July, 13 Medusa Oblongata said...

Een Soviet Russia, girl strips you.

5:35 pm July, 13 Mr. White said...

Ron Jeremy’s slovenly first cousin sure can pull some tail.
.
lolcats

6:03 pm July, 13 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Een Soviet Canada, sometimes you give her the Lenny, sometimes she gives you the Box. I’m going to roll one hundred fat ones for the four day high school reunion beginning tomorrow eve with world renowned bands such as: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KCfEAzeLP-w.
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Cause that’s the way I roll.
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Defaulters

6:12 pm July, 13 creature said...

that dude is from Chiapas…
…Capt CunnytDingus
.
.
.
.
Commander Chingaderus

6:21 pm July, 13 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

And from Georgia. Sons. I hate this band really. But wtf.
.

6:23 pm July, 13 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Well fuck Collective Soul anyway. How about?
.

6:30 pm July, 13 creature said...

love me some Panamanian Wanna Hump Hump bars
.
vulva

6:33 pm July, 13 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

And tomorrow’s headliner:
.

.
Every evening is being covertly headlined by 80’s rockers, Reverend Chad and the Hellseeker Stonerbuds. Myself on drums and draft tap.
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Alumni

6:56 pm July, 13 shawk said...

That’s his wife. He’s 22 and does not expect to see 24.

7:14 pm July, 13 Adolf Skroatler von Baggenstein said...

Just got back from Costa Rica, tried to find a cure for my A.D.D…. good God, look at this chick, she’s fine as…. what the hell is that guy doing with a mask on his… See I told you money makes you handsome, that’s why my wife fuuu….. What was I doing again???

Hasta,
ASvB

7:33 pm July, 13 Steve L. said...

for once, i approve of robbing the damn place.

8:50 pm July, 13 idfma said...

Hey Tall Guy,

I love you man, but point of clarification: she is not orange, she is what’s known as ‘latina’ on this side of the Pacific. And she is fucking awesome.

1:15 am July, 14 Colossus of Choads said...

HALL OF HOTT!!!!!!
OOOooo mamma.

2:55 am July, 14 injoi said...

She looks like olivia munn….

4:58 am July, 14 DoucheyWallnuts said...

He’s the drummer for the tribute band, “The Moody Boobs.” Or maybe she is…

5:39 am July, 14 DouchYouWannaDance said...

I’m tryin’ to figure out…

That looks like he’s sitting in a church pew. Am I wrong?

I want to know in what situation do you find a sexy babe in a black bikini in church??? And where is this church so I can join?

6:06 am July, 14 Douchble Helix said...

2:28 pm July, 13 Troy Tempest said…
Hey, TT – I got the Warhol reference.
.
@ND – First, Barely Legal What’s Her Name isn’t good enough. Then my dream girls from Crotch Johnson *are* good enough. Now, this admittedly fine thing knocks out the only two women who ever *really* loved me out of your HoH voting.
.
Why?… Why? Why? Why?

6:24 am July, 14 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Wow I was stoned last night. This beautiful doe-eyed latina with the burn victim and Dali inspired Page is one of the hottest pieces on here in a while. All curvy like and shit. Probably dirty like a manged chupacabra too.
.
Federales

7:49 am July, 14 Douche Springsteen said...

Take a look at that face, kids. That’s the longing look of regret that says “I knew I should’ve stayed in school instead of dropping out to hit the road to play bass with Taint Fung.” Sure, seemed like a good idea at the time but 15 years later not even a radiant beauty like Salina can you snap you out of a funk like that. For what it’s worth, I also nominate her for Hall of Hott. And by nominate her for Hall of Hott I mean “invite her to sit on my face for a few days”.

8:16 am July, 14 DarkSock said...

That is some USDA Prime Porch Beef right there, buddy.
.
The chick is hott also.

8:39 am July, 14 I R A Darth Aggie said...

He might be an old musician, or just an old bag, but speaking as an older dude myself: rock on!

8:41 am July, 14 I R A Darth Aggie said...

I see a nomination for Hall of Hott. I second (or third). And by that, I mean rode hard, and left sweaty and worn out

9:30 am July, 14 Nancy Dreuche said...

@DH, sorry but its not that hard to hang in Vegas with a choad, bottle service and your bikini bestie. I changed my nom because this new chick get points for looking good in some pretty shady surroundings. I hate to say it, but it really is all about location, location, location.
.
And why do you care how I vote anyways? I don’t have any pull around here. Heck, I’m not even in the Hall of Mock. I blame my boobless avatar and the fact I’m just into men. It truly is a bikini’ed bisexual woman’s world here on the interwebs.

10:07 am July, 14 DarkSock said...

^Tru Dat
.
.
.
lol

10:34 am July, 14 tall guy said...

@idfma, you know I realised my mistake moments after hitting the submit button. Agreed, she’s far from orange. We, on this side of that great sewerage outlet known as the Pacific Ocean, have similarly hued South East Asian exotic hotts to ogle and fondle (for a price…) It’s early. It’s Friday. I need more coffee.

11:05 am July, 14 idfma said...

Tall Guy,
If that’s the only mistake you made yesterday, you’re waaaay ahead of me. Now I have to ask–how much is the price for fondle–please include airfare.

1:35 pm July, 14 Troy Tempest said...

Douchble Helix said…

2:28 pm July, 13 Troy Tempest said…
Hey, TT – I got the Warhol reference.
———————————————–

thanks for noticing!

1:36 pm July, 14 THEONETRUEDOUCHE said...

I wish I could go to the strip club, but if someone took a picture and then it was posted on a webstie and then my wife saw it- I can’t go

Dude, just wear my terrorist hallowwen costume. No one will know you and chicks dig it.

2:24 pm July, 14 Stephanie said...

Moe is famous for trying to drum In A Gadda Da Vida,so he can play more state fairs.

6:34 pm July, 14 Douchble Helix said...

@ND – Why do I care?
.
Well, I guess that’s just a part of who I am. A caring, sensitive person, who thinks that what is on other people’s minds *is* important, dammit!
.
btw, just for clarification, it’s just your avatar that’s boobless, right?

7:33 pm July, 14 Nancy Dreuche said...

@DH, I’m gonna steal a line from our own Stephanie and say yeah I looked down my shirt and I found boobs there.

7:49 pm July, 14 Douchble Helix said...

@ND – What about about all that heartfelt stuff I shared?

8:00 pm July, 14 Nancy Dreuche said...

@DH, send me a peen pic and I’ll get back to you about that other stuff.

8:12 pm July, 14 Douchble Helix said...

@ND – ROWR!!

8:55 pm July, 14 Nancy Dreuche said...

@DH, what is that an acronym for?

11:25 pm July, 14 Douchble Helix said...

I had a hunch about that question being asked. It’s not.
It’s the (tiger-like?) growling sound Bob Hope used to make in his movies when Elke Summers said something suggestive. Howard Stern and the boys picked up on it some years back. Pre-internets.
.
I had a pic taken of my junk a few years ago, just before cell phones had cameras.
While I never thought I’d be writing about this on a nationally recognized blog…. For some reason a lipstick lesbian needed such a photo. Her first choice for model, one of my buddies, declined. I need to mention that we were in our local bar, which among the many personalities it had each day, it was most famously a lesbian place.
Anyways, she settled on asking me, and a minute or two later we’re in the men’s restroom, and she’s posing Jr. for his close-up. I suppose some days are better than others in the cock photo biz, and from a photogenic standpoint, I had a good day.
End of story, sadly. No “Big Penthouse Finish” (which I generally require when I’m told such a story. Even if it’s total BS, I insist the guy at least wrap the story up with, “Then I banged the shit out of her.”). And I never saw the pic anywhere.
Text or e-mail?

8:52 am July, 15 Nancy Dreuche said...

US Postal Service. And make sure its in sepia tone. I’ve kinda got a collage thing going and I like to keep the color scheme consistent.

9:58 am July, 15 Douchble Helix said...

DB1 has your address?

11:34 am July, 15 Nancy Dreuche said...

Dear god, I hope not.

3:43 pm July, 15 Douchble Helix said...

By the way, without the mustache, Old Man Moe looks just a local character named Drunk Jesus. aka Chief Drinking Beer. aka John The Painter.
Well, wearing something other than the pleather suit, too.

11:03 pm July, 15 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Who’s looking at him, all right already?
She’s Hall of Hott materiele.
Oui oui.

3:09 am July, 17 Christina Carabini said...

We just need to learn how to go into that memory store and take what we need according to a specific moment or situation.. .Which are the goals of the technique you teach practice?.If I think on a specific goal it will be how to make the students to go in and out of the floor with ease.

9:09 pm July, 17 Panama foundation said...

We just need to learn how to go into that memory store and take what we need according to a specific moment or situation.. .Which are the goals of the technique you teach practice?.If I think on a specific goal it will be how to make the students to go in and out of the floor with ease.

6:22 pm July, 21 notadouche said...

I must have her.

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