Thursday, July 28, 2011

Sergeant Pooper’s Douchey Hearts Club Land

The United Nations of Stupid Hand Gestures approves this message.

Carrie’s body may say yes, but her eyes say deep disappointment from her parents over her failed orthodontist assistant career.

# posted by douchebag1
11:20 am July, 28 Jeff said...

This chick’s got Bell’s Palsy. Hit. It. From. Behind.

11:27 am July, 28 Douche Springsteen said...

Something about her looks a bit off. Like Jude Law in A.I. Only not as sexy.

11:29 am July, 28 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

They all have a face for radio promotion, which is what I think they are doing poor small market fuckkers.

11:31 am July, 28 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

And breast cancer awareness week is no joke. Look at the tumor on her left nipple. Calling Dr. Sanjay. Dr. Oz, Dr. Phil?

11:38 am July, 28 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

fuck the what?

11:56 am July, 28 Medusa Oblongata said...

They can have her. No, really, they can have her.

11:58 am July, 28 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

You may think you hear Carrie’s body say “yes”, but her body actually says, “grmppt mrphligit erghgh.” Her eyes say, “please put me back in my wheelchair.”

12:31 pm July, 28 Wedgie said...

I recognize this photo. It’s in the dictionary under “pity fuck”.

12:32 pm July, 28 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Lifehouse has nothing on The Buttholes.

12:32 pm July, 28 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Only my dead grandpa should be allowed to wear a belt that’s above his navel.

12:52 pm July, 28 Mandouchian Candidate said...

Nothing about this photo is good except for the opportunity to throw out a “face for radio,” line. On a scale of 1-10, i give her about a 4* and she only gets the * because with half her face paralyzed, she probably throws out some pretty cool noises…
*
Take that out of my ath.

12:52 pm July, 28 DarkSock said...

This is the Homoslavian “Pretenders” tribute band. With lead singer Pissy Hinds.

1:15 pm July, 28 tall guy said...

Dude on right’s obviously “security” at this fine establishment. It’s moments like this I wish I could lol with the worst of them.

2:13 pm July, 28 Mr. Biggs said...

I’m just thinking Queen of Hearts from Alice in Wonderland, aka fag hag.

2:21 pm July, 28 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

@tall guy
.
Since when did a bowlling alley require security? Must be a very, very bad neighborhood in Des Moines.

2:22 pm July, 28 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Anyone else notice how her right boob looks like a kidney?

3:21 pm July, 28 DarkSock said...

Anyone else notice how her right boob looks like it took a dump?

3:24 pm July, 28 schlicht bindenburger said...

what a sausage party. she’s a blow up doll, i got her in my pantry right now!

4:44 pm July, 28 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

The look on her face says “Who keeps poking me in the ass with a needle? I’m gettin’ really sick of it!”

5:21 pm July, 28 Devil's Advocate said...

Just shove your groin into the nearest available space, Tony.

9:32 pm July, 28 Stephanie said...

She needs three guys to hold her up by their penises.

10:47 pm July, 28 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

That damn pinkeye is just rampant any more, just like in me elementary school days. I had no idea being a hottie on the way to Bleethdom with three muskyteers was a way to get a bad-staph infection just by looking bad-ass.

10:49 pm July, 28 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Er, uh, um, LOLITA called, and she wants all three pairs of her heart-shaped sunglasses back, quick, before Humbert Humbert realizes he’s being had.

6:07 am July, 29 Vin Douchal said...

Jumping in a little late here but rock’s been dead for a number of years as probably the last truly epic band to come out of that stable was Stone Temple Pilots. I defy anyone to name a groundbreaking rock outfit since the mid 80’s.

The last vestige of writing / playing with a well structured skill set is Outlaw Country / Americana. The Drive-By Truckers, Wilco and Cross Canadian Ragweed come to mind first. They rock with a decidedly southern flavor and don’t give a shit about the critics, selling out venues on a nightly basis.

I’ll agree with Mr S Head about the current music scene being all about manufactured sound and talent being secondary but just because you play and sing without modern technology “enhancing” your studio performance it doesn’t make you good. Lifehouse’a first hit , something about living in the moment, wasn’t all bad but a steady stream of audio narcolepsy since has rendered them useless

1:44 pm July, 29 joey-joe-joe said...

i need a ruling on this one: it appears to be a gathering for breast cancer something-or-other…. not deserving of a notta, mind you, but perhaps we salute the willingness of these, uh, ‘individuals’ to wear pink in an ongoing effort to ‘get with’ the local flunky radio dj that is obviously WAY hotter over the air than she is in real life. only thing left to complete the fantasy is to get drunk and try to let the mind fill in what the radio leaves out but becomes apparent when meeting the owner of said voice. and a boob is a boob, kidney-shaped or otherwise.

11:44 am August, 3 Scumdouche said...

Awwwwwww… matchin’ shades & a scissor gang mafia sign… I’m all a-twitter… & I DON’T EVER TWIT!!!

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