Wednesday, July 20, 2011

The Broctopus Strikes!

Observe the Broctopus in its native habitat — Overpriced Airport Bar #423.

The Broctopus knows that impressing Melinda with its six pack abs can take place at any moment. If the PH balance is right, and you lower the Axe Bodyspray ratio to a suboptimal 1.5 parts per quanta.

# posted by douchebag1
7:07 am July, 20 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Reminds me of 15 years ago when the paper mills went on strike. We tried to hoard as much tissue as we could.
Inevitably we ran out and while some took to old newspaper or leaves, I took the high road of crust and fall off. And when it fell off it looked like this..
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She has come from the ethereal land of eternal bleeth, Xanaxadu.
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Preacher Cocckswains

7:27 am July, 20 wgas said...

Best of luck to both of them.

7:28 am July, 20 DarkSock said...

Male Erectile Dysfunction: Now in convenient Push-Button Form!

7:29 am July, 20 Et Tu Douche? said...

Wow!!!, how sad and pathetic.
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.
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Cow Tippers

7:29 am July, 20 DarkSock said...

“TEE HEE HEE! You’re right! I CAN feel the gerbil still kicking!!!”

7:40 am July, 20 hermit android thumbs said...

Napkin shirt?

8:08 am July, 20 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Ever watch those nature specials on the Discovery Channel? You know the kind. Exotic birds strutting around, flashing colorful plumage, and singing in the effort to attract a mate?
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Point is: Broctopus can’t help himself. There is tiny snippet of DNA hiding deep inside his lizard-brain telling him he must put on a colorful display in order to procreate. He is nature’s fool, and I pity him.

8:19 am July, 20 I R A Darth Aggie said...

Let me guess, when threatened with a righteous mocking, he squirts ink and makes a hasty getaway?

8:43 am July, 20 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

Prior to the picture, Broctopus whispers “squat down, so they can’t tell I’m only 4′ 11”

9:00 am July, 20 wgas said...

I believe those boots she is wearing are of the “Do Me” variety. Do you think Broctopus will be able set aside a little time from showing off his abs to take her shoes up on their offer.

9:03 am July, 20 wgas said...

“If the shoe fits, fuck it.”-Broctopus

10:00 am July, 20 baleen said...

The dude on the right looks like his forearm was beaten with a tire iron, and I’m cool with that.

10:09 am July, 20 Too Little, Too Late said...

I didn’t know Duckface had crossed the gender barrier. Woo! I’m impressed. The gelled hair doesnt make you look taller, just way too Jersey Shore. Overly Metrosexual?!?

10:11 am July, 20 Hermit said...

Melinda indicates the high water mark for Broctopus’ veneral warts.

11:51 am July, 20 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Both are in serious need of a good CUNCHing. That’s right baby, I’m bringing it back!

12:50 pm July, 20 Troy Tempest said...

And his brain is RIGHT THERE!

3:27 pm July, 20 Steve L. said...

Melinda looks 10x bleethier than Julie.
but i’d probably still do her.

3:33 pm July, 20 Steve L. said...

$10 says that everyone in an airport bar is a CEO who is flying to deliver a “keynote address” at Harvard. and Melinda had met 50 such “CEOs” already.
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but somehow i don’t sympathize her that much.

8:42 pm July, 20 Stephanie said...

Two seconds later,she pressed the button,and he farted.

9:32 pm July, 20 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

She’s merely checkin’ his sound for the Bluegrass Jamboree event they’re attending…he’s the washboard instrument, and she’s the lucky strummer. I heard she plays other instruments.

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