Thursday, August 18, 2011

Lil Pepe Gets a Nottadouche

Ya know Lil’ Pepe, if you need to bust the open collar + bling Mehico giggolo look, good on you.

Have a nottadouche and a goinpeace.

Life’s rough enough as it is.

And if you can score some Drunk Caroline boobal fondle, alls the better.

But if I find that you’re not a Lil’ Pepe, you’re actually Average Pepe and just happen to be sitting on a couch, ‘bag is back in play.

# posted by douchebag1
7:16 am August, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

She reminds me of a girl I new in my twenties. Her name was Nunscunt Bagrash.
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Debtholders

7:22 am August, 18 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Have you ever taken a prodigious, loose dump and then, when you flush a little remnant is left behind to float alone in the clean post-flush water? This is what Lil Pepe is.
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Lumpkins

7:31 am August, 18 I R A Darth Aggie said...

I dunno…isn’t he in the Zeta cartel?

7:32 am August, 18 Mandouchian Candidate said...

No better combination than a minority with that “deer in headlights look,” and a past her prime white woman with a wedding band out at da club. Say what you want, Mexicans do alot of jobs that us white folk just won’t do. I think Lil Pepe deserves some sort of Bronze Star for jumping on a grenade for someone.

7:35 am August, 18 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Caroline is a drunken firebrand who can erupt like a volcano filed with 6 kinds of crazy. Pepe must have a big karmic debt from a previous lifetime. I envy him not at all.

7:35 am August, 18 Choad The Douche Sprocket said...

Don’t be bustin’ on Lil Pepe….he’s one helluva tree trimmer.

7:41 am August, 18 Hurl Scheibe said...

Uptight white guy in the back says, “Pepe should stick to picking lettuce. And stay away from the white women.”

7:53 am August, 18 Et Tu Douche? said...

Uptight White Guy is a dick!!!!!

7:54 am August, 18 Face Ripper Monkey said...

Crucial?

7:57 am August, 18 Et Tu Douche? said...

Uptight White Guy is just bummed out cause he realizes that he could never handle, a crazy eyed, slightly chunky Latina like Caroline, in the sack.

7:59 am August, 18 Et Tu Douche? said...

Uptight White Guy is bummed out and wishing he was back in Connecticut.

8:03 am August, 18 Hurl Scheibe said...

Carolina say, “Pepe, no me quieres dar besos en mi taco, papacito?” (Pepe, don’t you want to kiss my taco, papacito?)

Pepe freezes.

Slightly crazy chunky latinas are like that.

Chilupas

8:04 am August, 18 Hurl Scheibe said...

If Lil’ Pepe is his name, what does he call his Lil’ Pepe?

8:07 am August, 18 Et Tu Douche? said...

@Hurl
I assuming he would call it Pepito, but who really cares what he’s referring to his Johnson as.

8:11 am August, 18 Et Tu Douche? said...

Uptight White Guy is bummed out cause he just remembered that his racquetball match for Friday after lunch has been canceled.

8:12 am August, 18 memphis doucheworkers local 421 said...

So why is pink shirt trustfundite investment ‘bag so upset?

8:13 am August, 18 Chumanominom said...

Holy cap… she has three tits, one with a moustache!

8:16 am August, 18 Et Tu Douche? said...

Uptight White Guy is bummed out cause he just realized that he forgot to pack his favorite whale belt to go with his “Nantucket Red’s”

8:21 am August, 18 Et Tu Douche? said...

Uptight White Guy is upset cause he wandered into this bar and isn’t used to seeing this much melanin.

8:22 am August, 18 Hurl Scheibe said...

Uptight White Guy is bummed out that his shorts are so tight they make him look stiffer than a cigar store indian.

8:26 am August, 18 Et Tu Douche? said...

Uptight White Guy is bummed out cause the DJ doubled over in derisive laughter when he asked him if he could play some Hootie & the Blowfish.

8:30 am August, 18 Mandouchian Candidate said...

Uptight white guy is bummed because he had to shower with one of those Low-flow shower heads.

8:31 am August, 18 Mandouchian Candidate said...

Uptight white guy is bummed because he thought Caroline was going to be an easy slay, but he was underbid and overmatched by Lil Pepe.

8:31 am August, 18 Et Tu Douche? said...

Uptight White Guy is bummed out cause he forgot to pack his SPF 50+

8:35 am August, 18 Hurl Scheibe said...

Uptight White Guy is bummed that the bartender doesn’t know how to make a Cape Cod.

8:36 am August, 18 Hurl Scheibe said...

Update White Guy is bummed that Carolina laughed at his Madras LL Bean shorts.

8:37 am August, 18 Hurl Scheibe said...

Uptight White Guy is bummed that the smell of tequila makes him nauseaous so now he has no shot at Carolina.

8:37 am August, 18 Hurl Scheibe said...

Uptight White Guy is bummed because Lil’ Pepe just opened his shirt to reveal a Latin Kings tattoo.

8:39 am August, 18 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Uptight white guy just learned that crazy drunk latinas don’t want to hear the story of his office tiff with Stu from accounting.

8:40 am August, 18 Et Tu Douche? said...

Uptight White Guy is bummed out cause he forgot to DVR the judging for the NON-SPORTING category for this years Westminster Kennel Club competition.

8:52 am August, 18 Vin Douchal said...

Uptight White Guy is bummed out ’cause he no speak-a-spinach

8:53 am August, 18 Vin Douchal said...

Uptight White Guy is bummed out ’cause from that angle all he can see is Drunk Caroline’s back fat over her panty line through her dress

9:46 am August, 18 Douchble Helix said...

Great comments! I’m laughing like an Uptight White Guy reading HCwDB.

10:23 am August, 18 Medusa Oblongata said...

Uptight White Guy is bummed out ’cause there’s no GAP in this town.

10:26 am August, 18 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Uptight white guy just realized that uptight white guys are the new minority. That, and Pepe just fired him for doing a crap job of edging his lawn.

10:27 am August, 18 Medusa Oblongata said...

Uptight White Guy is bummed because the barista put regular milk in his latte instead of soy milk.
.
THERE’S NO SUCH THING AS SOY MILK.

10:30 am August, 18 Medusa Oblongata said...

Uptight White Guy is bummed because she OBVIOUSLY is not into yoga.

10:37 am August, 18 Medusa Oblongata said...

Uptight White Guy is bummed because she prefers Pepe’s ’68 Impala over his Mercury Mountaineer.

10:42 am August, 18 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Uptight white guy is holding on to 46 as long as he can.

10:48 am August, 18 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Uptight white guy wishes he hadn’t washed his red socks with his white shirt.

12:16 pm August, 18 Hurl Scheibe said...

Uptight White Guy is bummed he can’t control his anal leakage.

12:28 pm August, 18 Miss Tina Marie Anal said...

Uptight White Guy just doesn’t like to be photographed with, you know, those people.

1:35 pm August, 18 Stephanie said...

Lil Pepe calls it his Chorizo.

2:52 pm August, 18 memphis doucheworkers local 421 said...

It’s OK, Uptight White Guy, your daddy can still pull some strings and get you that 6-figure job at Morgan Keegan despite your 2.1 GPA at Ole Miss.

2:59 pm August, 18 Douchble Helix said...

Is that her dress’s ‘tummy panel’ thingy turned way to her left?

6:16 pm August, 18 doublejiz said...

Uptight White Guy is upset because he had just proposed to Carolina until Lil Pepe walked into the bar and swept her off her feet.

8:27 pm August, 18 Choad Harolde's Pilgrimmage said...

Uptight white guy is bummed because he just read the label on his Blue Moon and found out that it’s brewed by Coors.

2:42 am August, 19 Crocodile Dun Douche said...

I like to think lil Pepe is actually standing in this photo…

And I dont want to question why I like to imagine that.

3:28 am August, 19 Steve L. said...

who knew Genghis Khan had a Napoleon complex?

7:51 am August, 19 Phil said...

“Pepe!!!! Get back to work!!!!!”

“Si señor……………”

10:40 am August, 19 Uptight white guy said...

Fuck you all! I will not be upstaged by some little Corona-swilling, strawberry-picking, no tax-paying, drain on the social system abusing, chalupa-snorting puto who was clearly trying to take what I rightfully stole from him. Now, why don’t you all go back to minding your own business!

12:42 pm August, 19 SonnyChibaChoad said...

Pepe about to get his MS-13 beatdown
.
.
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Salvatruchas…

12:11 am August, 23 banner ads said...

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