Friday Haiku
In a perfect world,
This asshole would don a shirt;
Preferably hers.
I would name her breasts
As Fat Man and Little Boy.
I’d like to drop them.
— Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt
No shirt, a bow tie.
That’s a look that never works.
Unless it’s on her.
— FoghornLeghorn
Always campaigning.
Michelle Bachmann Junior tries
To pray away gay.
— The Reverend Chad Kroeger
Mahogany gimp,
freezes clubland (and tailors),
with basilisk stare.
— The e’er-present Anonymous
Chippendales reject,
Angers Swayze and Farley,
Afterlife ruined.
— Condouchious
Holy Chest Muffins.
They could save you from drowning.
Or drown you as well.
— jonezy
Prom poster was clear
In bold print “Black tie AND tails”
Not “Black tie and fails”
— Mr. Scrotato Head
Sweaty cuff on wrist
Don’t ask where that thing has been
And do not smell it
— Vin Douchal
Scribbles on his pants,
Scribbles on his skin. This calls
for huge eraser.
Again, those club lights
Seem like UV bug killers.
Why ain’t he writhing??
Greasepitz plays new game
With friend Pat. “I Can’t Believe
It’s not penis.” Aaar.
I’m not really gay.
She isn’t really a girl.
It’s true. Smell my fingers.
I would name her breasts
As Fat Man and Little Boy.
I’d like to drop them.
That little girl from
Cosby done grew some big boobs.
And shat out this stool.
He scrawls insipid
poetry on his rib cage.
Where’s a baseball bat?
Even bathed in the
pink light of the douche club he
still looks very orange
“As Mr. Gayniverse
I would like to help the poor…..
Ewww. She has boobies.”
MixOff says poster.
So he tries opposite sex.
It seems queer to him.
Stunned by the bright lights
Around them Mr. and Mrs. Club
Kid see Carnival.
Satin tie, satin
wrist bands–he smiles because he
wears matching panties
Club workers take five
Before heading back into
Each others’ asses
A shining liberal light.
Tad never hides his feelings.
Wears cum rag on sleeve.
No shirt, a bow tie.
That’s a look that never works.
Unless it’s on her.
New tooth models for
Crest White Strips. Removes poo stains
In three easy steps.
Open your wallet!
That photo with Miss Grey Goose
Isn’t free, Schmuckstain
Always campaigning.
Michelle Bachmann Junior tries
To pray away gay.
Mahogany gimp,
freezes clubland (and tailors),
with basilisk stare.
Crazy Eyed Killa
Hoped to never see you again
Greazepitzs chug balls
I didn’t know they now have surgery that will alow a chick to enlarge her head to match her fake boobies….wow she has a big head!
Googley-eyed Choad
Needs swift kick to back of head
chick needs to de-louse.
Matching sister’s fame
Hard for Kat Kardashian.
Wanna make a tape?
Get the lady a
Gimlet. I’ll have the Cleveland
Steamer straight up, please.
Starving Orange ‘Bag
And built up Boobs
Collide to form the noxious miasma
Chippendales reject,
Angers Swayze and Farley,
Afterlife ruined
Holy Chest Muffins.
They could save you from drowning.
Or drown you as well.
Allergic to shirts
Sally Struthers commercial
begs you to donate
Good morning, Killa
The doctor will see you now
For prostate milking
A shrinking bowtie
with a mind of its own would
be welcome right now.
He gives new meaning
to “Don’t ask, don’t tell”. She makes
“bouncer” obvious.
Killa makes hover
hand move hoping that a reach
around is in store.
Don’t ask, don’t tell, but…
To be truly safe you should
Don’t look and don’t smell
Her fun bags almost
Distract me from that shit stick.
Holy Smackerel!
“She took my panties”
cries Killa. Her face says “Both
front and back crusty!”
Crazy Eyes Killer
Poster boy for Ritalin
Rides his Sybian.
Why Jesus? Please why?
Do these two make any sense,
but in our shit world?
Front and back crusty
Makes Reverend Chad exhale
Frosty breakfast.
Prom poster was clear
In bold print “Black tie AND tails”
Not “Black tie and fails”
The first day of autumn
When the pumpkins are swelling
And douche turn orange-er
Rib inscription reads
“I am a vacuous ass,
now blow me sweetheart.”
His face shows her right
hand is searching for quarter
tips from his coin slot.
One can only hope
Ray of light in background is
freight train on its way.
Reason 9 of my
“Why to avoid Cabo” list
hIs & hers herpes
The very next day
He’s back at the tatt parlor
“Juan, you missed a spot”.
Alvin Chipmunk
Child star turned man scrote
theodore disgusted
Hey! Look at this shit
The room and bar’s still open
Toss a few Haikus
Sweaty cuff on wrist
Don’t ask where that thing has been
And do not smell it
This guy’s amped on meth
Her gender is in question
Hand me my jackboots
King and Queen by vote
At the midget convention
Hey, congrats, now scram
Mr. Scrotato
Vin and Wedgie arrive late
Dark Sock is drinkin’.
notice the seat card
in case of water landing
boobie floatation
rejected sex toy
from mail order catalog
a bowtie cockring
his eyes hunger for
photog’s telephoto lens
and not her funbags
Seen this look before
As bug hurdles towards my car
For death by windshiled
shiled?
Her rubber baby
buggy bumpers interfere
with Killa’s gaydar.
Does his face look that
way because he forgot to
put knee pads in jeans?
We must endure poo
Anxiously awaiting pear
Life’s a cruel bitch
Gosh she’s butch-stacked
He’s on Crack
I got nothin…
^Barron: 4-3-4
Is a poor man’s Haiku-lite
Buy more syllables
diarrhea just
about to explode from his
rectum. watch out Kim!
gay bag does not count…
gay bag does not fucking count!
gay bag does not count…
know what i’m sayin’?
turd