Thursday, September 8, 2011

Land Speedo

Public Speedo = Autobag. No exceptions, even if you’re otherwise an unassuming version of noted thespian Patrick Wilson.

Gypsy Rose may not have visible face offered for our collective and shallow judging process, but she does offer body curve.

As I was watering the alpacas this morning out by the water vapor processors, I asked a nearby lemur what he thought of Gypsy Rose’s succulent curves.

But lemurs can’t talk.

Silly me.

# posted by douchebag1
11:26 am September, 8 Choad The Douche Sprocket said...

That’s the Venetian…and I haven’t seen a peen that small since the shower this morning.

11:37 am September, 8 The Dude said...

If I was a nearby lemur I’d say “shigoddamit, I like GR’s curves!”

11:38 am September, 8 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

I believe this was John Lithgow’s audition for the part of Dr. Dick Solomon in Third Rock from the Sun. Who know’s what would’ve happened had he not made it. HINT: Sex in the City.

11:45 am September, 8 boone doggle said...

GR gets bonus points for keeping her anal beads handy.

11:49 am September, 8 Vin Douchal said...

Would you rather see this guy in a Speedo or Zack in a one-piece?
.

11:58 am September, 8 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Gypsy Rose, grasping the gravity of the situation, did the wise thing by covering her face, thus saving herself much potential mocking.

12:03 pm September, 8 DarkSock said...

As Dixie looked down at her shoes she slowly became aware that those were not Milk Duds she was stepping on.

12:25 pm September, 8 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Land Speedo dances with glee as he finally wins the coveted Labor Day ” Who Got No Tan Lines?” contest hosted by Cedric The Entertainer.
.
Prize: Men’s housecoat and Booty dance with Gypsy Rose, The Unknown Hooker.

1:13 pm September, 8 THEONETRUEDOUCHE said...

“Sneak up behind you and grind guy” was then taken into custody and now must inform the local courts everytime he moves.

1:21 pm September, 8 jonezy said...

I know this gallery of dunces isn’t much of a place for the ‘ol political rantings but maybe our resident PhDs can explain this to me in some sort of proof or mathematical terms.
.
Bachman is obviously pro-life, as in a mother doesn’t get a choice in abortion, but then she does want a mother to have a choice in whether their daughter should get anti-cancer inoculations. WTF is that about??
.
BACHMANN: “It’s wrong for government, whether it’s state or federal government, to impose on parents what they must do to inoculate their children.”
.
please change “inoculate” to “abort” and tell me the fucking difference. Reminds me of that Choncords episode where they were debating if he was anti-AIDS or not.
.
“Everybody is anti-AIDS, Brit”
.
“well somebody is probably not anti-AIDS”
.
Michelle mutha fuckin Bachman. That’s who. She probably dresses her kids like douchebags.

1:24 pm September, 8 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

@Jonesy a thread back
.
I’m working again from the I office built into the front of the plantation. Stoned all day long. Don’t drink until first post here Eastern Time.
.
Stoned Man At Work

1:28 pm September, 8 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Michelle Bachman is the worst singer BTO ever had. She’s the one with the fuzzy hair.
.

1:36 pm September, 8 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Dark Soc was right.
.
http:www.youtube.com/watch?v=aJprEyXMrlk

1:38 pm September, 8 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Fukcers
.

.
I hate that Bachman.

1:44 pm September, 8 Mrs. Robinson said...

Wow Jonezy, AIDS abortion and cancer. All great first date topics but I thought we were here to mock douchebags. And check out Zack G in a one piece. Thanks Vin.

1:53 pm September, 8 The Dude said...

Zack FTW

1:57 pm September, 8 Troy Tempest said...

Land Speedo has his legs spread because he’s fixin’ to dump a dookie in his shorts.

2:00 pm September, 8 jonezy said...

Sorry Mrs. R, I forgot to also mention the endless repercussions of Nazi Germany
.
and the funny one

2:14 pm September, 8 Daggerbagger' said...

@DocBunsen 11:38, Genuine chuckle ou loud-to-beverage spill

2:21 pm September, 8 Steve L. said...

if lemurs can use a claymore and set things on fire, that’s good enough for me. because we’ll need some claymore hacking and fire setting.

4:43 pm September, 8 Wolfram74 said...

This guy should receive an atomic speedo wedgie & then be tossed into Pooville . The pose alone warrants that .

4:52 pm September, 8 SocialNetworkist said...

The fact that he’s wearing a red Speedo tells me hes interested in my attention on his groinal area ASAP. What if you don’t look good in the color red though? How do you let someone know you’re interested?

4:58 pm September, 8 Douchble Helix said...

This photo link is from the same website: (left to right) A young Barbara Cooper, a horse being peed in, and I saw her first.
http://poolparties.napkinnights.com/pics/view_image.php?id=393779

4:59 pm September, 8 Douchble Helix said...

Same sight again, the very next pic.
GSR – Groin Shadow Reveal of a HC?
http://poolparties.napkinnights.com/pics/view_image.php?id=393780

5:01 pm September, 8 Douchble Helix said...

Same sight. You tell me?
http://poolparties.napkinnights.com/pics/view_image.php?id=393802

5:07 pm September, 8 SocialNetworkist said...

@Doucheble Helix, you need to get yourself to NapkinNights before all that’s left is the horse being peed in and those two old broads from the last pic. Daaamn. Pickins is slim.

5:17 pm September, 8 Douchble Helix said...

“In my mind, I’m already there.” – (Cosmo) Kramer
.
Is that what that last pic was? Two old broads? If you’re sure.
.
Check out the other albums, like New Years Eve. That may be ground zero for DBs.

7:22 pm September, 8 Stephanie said...

That guy has got to get outside a little more,the white skin is blinding me. And he’s like someone’s dad who just got a divorce,and just started stepping out again.

8:05 pm September, 8 Medusa Oblongata said...

Gypsy Rose looks more like Gypsy Poison Sumac. Say nothing of the red and white toadstool behind her.

8:09 pm September, 8 Chris in 'Baghdad said...

This speedo thing is so wrong on so many levels, I don’t know where to start.

And on political matters, Jonezy gets bragging rights on family issues once he has raised 23 well-adjusted foster children.

8:22 pm September, 8 Blah said...

The curse of the Irish on display.

9:04 pm September, 8 Douchble Helix said...

She didn’t raise all 23 from childhood to adulthood. Bachmann wants you to think that, but the truth, as can best be discerned is much different.
My understanding is they were mostly (all?) teen-aged at-risk women who received her & her “Secret Square” level gay husband’s (ht to Jon Stewart) ‘guidance’ on how to be good Christians.

11:45 pm September, 8 Jeet Kune Douche said...

There is NO WAY this guy is a douche. Douchosity implies at least a passing attraction for the female form. Just one look at him and you KNOW that he’s a fluffer for gay pron flicks.

6:15 am September, 9 I R A Darth Aggie said...

Gypsy Rose, you broke my heart. And stole my wallet. Guess which one really pisses me off?

9:15 am September, 9 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

I think Tom Hanks looks better then he has since gaining and then losing all that weight for “Castaway”.

12:54 am September, 11 Whoop-di-douche said...

The one saving grace of this pic is the Shakira-esque Gypsy Rose and her interesting combination of slim curves and funky hat. Skinny white guys who wear red Speedos that are actually smaller than a douchebag nozzle?…not a saving grace. He deserves twenty lashes with a douchebag hose.

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