Friday, October 14, 2011

Friday Haiku

The blouse parted wide,
To display gorgeous bronzed breasts;
Hers aren’t bad either…

Kettlehead returns
With Waxy McBrow’s Rachelle
Time to kill myself.

— Mr. Scrotato Head

El Rico Suavé,
Blouse-busting hero for the
juiced up pendehoes.

— The Dude

Now there’s quite a shelf!
Their protrusion defies all.
I mean physics laws.

— Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt

Youngest of the clan,
Kunty Kardashian is
Video ready.

— The Reverend Chad Kroeger

“Why are you grabbing
me,” says Kate. “And since when do
Valets wear D-necks?”

— Sergeant Scrote Stain

# posted by Bagnonymous
6:56 am October, 14 The Dude said...

El Rico Suavé,
Blouse-busting hero for the
juiced up pendehoes.

7:01 am October, 14 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Now there’s quite a shelf!
Their protrusion defies all.
I mean physics laws.

7:05 am October, 14 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

He wears sunglasses
at night so he’d max his douche
And Corey Heart weeps

7:05 am October, 14 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

And the blood test says,
“You are a douchebag who needs
A new shirt and liver.”

7:06 am October, 14 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Kettlehead returns
With Waxy McBrow’s Rachelle
Time to kill myself

7:06 am October, 14 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Redshirt the Awesome
Performs his first illusion of
The night. Floating nipples.

7:07 am October, 14 dbaggins said...

Orange traffic cone
direct self in to sewage
and leave hots behind

7:08 am October, 14 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Little Lupe likes the
Anal. This explains the case
Of Hep, ABC.

7:10 am October, 14 dbaggins said...

Chestical pumpkin
carved from grease and grey goose
shove candle in ass

7:10 am October, 14 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Youngest of the clan,
Kunty Kardashian is
Video ready.

7:10 am October, 14 Sergeant Scrote Stain said...

“Why are you grabbing
me,” says Kate. “And since when do
Valets wear D-necks?”

7:14 am October, 14 dbaggins said...

Doctors appointment
diagnosis, visual
internet herpes

7:14 am October, 14 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

What do yous mean I
Should have to button up my shirt?
Fuck this place, Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrooo!

7:15 am October, 14 Hurl Scheibe said...

Oh, my beautiful moobs
Better than your girly boobs
My Bras love my moobs

7:16 am October, 14 saulgoode42 said...

No pair of hip shades
Can restrain his one eyebrow
In presense of boobs

7:16 am October, 14 Hurl Scheibe said...

Bad edit –

Oh, beautiful moobs
Better than your girly boobs
My Bras love my moobs

7:17 am October, 14 idfma said...

Single arched brow like
a checkmark in the ‘no’ box
for ‘Meaning in Life?’

7:24 am October, 14 saulgoode42 said...

Night Stalker Returns
Admittedly upped his game
I’d Ramirez that.

7:26 am October, 14 Chris in 'Baghdad said...

Lee Chin Fung say,
Bazongas on chesty Latina
Meet my chest shave reveal…

7:28 am October, 14 Sergeant Scrote Stain said...

Kettlehead displays
“pensive face.” Surprisingly
close to his “shit-faced.”

7:29 am October, 14 Douche Wayne said...

Sent from the future
to kill Ed Hardy before
Douche-ment Day occurs.

7:29 am October, 14 Douche Springsteen said...

dark nightclub brightened
by mayan eye of coitus
kettle’s brow arches

7:34 am October, 14 Douche Springsteen said...

battle of the bulge
latina special forces
cruz missiles deployed

7:38 am October, 14 Colossus of Choads said...

Sunglasses inside?
Oh Kettle-Man are you sure?
“Yes I bloody Khan”

7:40 am October, 14 Chris in 'Baghdad said...

SGT SS…where the hell you been the last 18 months???

7:42 am October, 14 Colossus of Choads said...

Primeval display,
nets gorilla wild club skanks,
but shames all primates.

7:42 am October, 14 Claude Douchenbagger said...

At Club 51
Wear your sunglasses inside
Won’t hide your doucheness

7:45 am October, 14 Claude Douchenbagger said...

Moobs clutche the boobettes
Boobettes smile for camera
Then run for banyo

7:47 am October, 14 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

The Terminator,
Sexy Sperminator, and
A Germinator

7:51 am October, 14 Sergeant Scrote Stain said...

@ Chris in Baghdad.

.

I’ve been around brother. I troll the site pretty often still, but I find that my creative juices have wilted (not to say that I was ever creative to begin with). I mean, what else is there to say about the douche? I read the comments of the regs, and they’re still quite entertaining, but I find myself lacking anything truly witty, or especially biting, to say.

.

I still mock the douche. And I still praise the boobies. And I am especially active in real life mocking, because nothing is more enjoyable than mocking a Tool right to his face without him ever realizing it. But as for internet mockage, I am afraid that I’m mostly retired. Mostly.

.

Who knows? It only takes one especially infuriating picture to rope me back in, as would be the same for the most of us.

.

What I am saying, is that there’s been a surplus of generic douche. I need “Mack the Nozzle” version 2.Douche.

7:51 am October, 14 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Kettlehead thinks you…
Did I say “Kettlehead thinks”?
Must be the boobies

7:52 am October, 14 Ed Hardouche said...

Retard neck transplant
Leg reduction surgery
Douchebag Frankenstein

7:52 am October, 14 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Kettlehead is found
in Area 51.
Start autopsy now.

7:55 am October, 14 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Sergeant Scrote Stain lives
And all is right with the world
Well, maybe not “all”

7:56 am October, 14 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

In a dark dance club
Kettlehead rocks the glasses
Chest glow lights the way

7:59 am October, 14 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Kettlehead gets it
Closed shirt, no shades, no M.O.
Douche is as Douche does

8:01 am October, 14 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Kettlehead reaches
new high on I.Q. test. Bar
set low for the rest.

8:04 am October, 14 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Is his face stuck that
way ’cause of Bell’s palsy? Pluck
that eyebrow to check.

8:06 am October, 14 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Button up that shirt
And remember boss’s words
Cars won’t park themselves

8:11 am October, 14 Sergeant Scrote Stain said...

One of Life’s Lessons:
Silicone should be displayed;
‘Roids should be hidden.

8:13 am October, 14 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Forget Kettlehead
Rachelle’s gold globes beckon
Raise my rod, not brow

8:18 am October, 14 Sergeant Scrote Stain said...

I never saw the
new “Apes” movie, but now, I
see its relevance.

8:41 am October, 14 Doucheywallnuts said...

Jimmy Smits Rock Bottom
TV show ” LA Awful”
Good ratings with bleeths

9:43 am October, 14 FoghornLeghorn said...

Press ’em on me girls.
I want my buddies to think
that I’m a straight guy.

10:26 am October, 14 tall guy said...

A contender for the weekly
for he don’t go meekly
bleeth under each arm
seacow in shiny blue on standby
living da vida puca

11:11 am October, 14 Anonymous said...

Outstanding perky boobies, fake or not re bleeth on left! Yuuuummy!

12:32 pm October, 14 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Rachelle is no bleeth
She is double scoops of joy
With father issues

2:57 pm October, 14 Steve L. said...

Liss Victoria
is hunting guys who don’t tip.
that’s you, Kettlehead.

5:17 pm October, 14 ehcuodouche said...

I don’t believe it
We nuked him from orbit, but
Kettlehead won’t die

8:23 am October, 15 Douche of Hazard said...

I have seen the Kettlehead in action in Deerfield Beach a couple of times. He’s a tiny little douche.

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