Friday, November 18, 2011

Friday Thoughts and Links

There is much about vaginal peace signs by Boris Russinsky hitting on Russian Poverty Model Hott that rankles the heart of a poet.

I’m not that poet. His name is Tim. He lives down the street and smells like patchouli and rice cakes.

I have little to offer in the ways of wisdom on this Friday in Los Angeles, other than the advice of the great Olympian Carl Lewis:

“I like hurdles.”

Here’s your links

Your HCwDB DVD Pick of the Week: “Why am I talking to you? You’re not a man, you’re a cat! Go back to your feline world!”

Yoga for Bros? “Broga?” In my hometown of Boston? For shame, Beantown. For shame.

Turkish Hottness. Like strong coffee and emancipated Islam.

Hipsters Vs. Hammer Pants.

What movie am I most excited to see this Holiday Season? Sandsharks. “Because your party isn’t on the sand. It’s on ice.” (no idea what that means)

Somewhere in Raveland America,… the kids aren’t all right.

Mila Kunis’s Semitic Russian hottness proves the folly of the nativist reactionary anti-Trotsky pogroms of the early 20th Century.

Can boobs ever be too large? Uhm… okay, yes.

But you are not here for grotesque mammaries. You are here for Pear:

Pensive Bridge Pear

Because coy pouting is also a form of pre-coitus.

And on that lameass pun, I crack a bottle of Mad Dog and scratch myself obliquely.

# posted by douchebag1
12:45 pm November, 18 Wheezer said...

Pensive Bridge Pear gave me a stiffie! Hmmmm heh heh heh heh heh!
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Oh sorry – I just posted a Beavis & Butthead haiku and the power to my mind hasn’t yet returned.
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And the Turkish hott is mine.

12:47 pm November, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I wouldn’t bang that big Brooke Hogan cowpig with Dr. Bunsen’s nepos. And by nepos I mean nepos. What’s up Doc?
.
Son

12:51 pm November, 18 Mandouchian Candidate said...

Two, count ’em two, I paid Two thousand dollars for an hour with this chick. Ah Ah Ah…


Transylvanians

12:57 pm November, 18 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

@ Rev Chad
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Thanks for the kind words from the previous thread. Every little bit has helped.
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As for my nepos, I’ll have you know they are in fine working order. Why just the other day I took them out of the closet, dusted them off, asked the wife “Honey, can use my nepos?” and was told in no uncertain terms I could never tutts them again. I’m assuming she mean I can’t tutts them but not someone like Medusa or Nancy. *finger crossed*

1:05 pm November, 18 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

@ Boss
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I don’t whether to laugh or cry. Mila said “I run around and pretend I’m someone else for twelve hours; I record Family Guy [she voices Meg]. Then I get to go home and watch Jersey Shore.” Say it ain’t so Mila. Say it ain’t so!

1:08 pm November, 18 Anonymous said...

I like that chick with the big titties. She makes Canseco’s chick look regular.
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On my PC, the pear pic offers a zoom. Use it.
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Oh, and I got a little something up my sleeve. You’re all going to hate it. But I must.

1:49 pm November, 18 Douchble Helix said...

The difference between Major League pussy, and Minor League pussy is *this* close:
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http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/847/milakunisarticle.jpg/

1:50 pm November, 18 Douchble Helix said...

That anonymous just above was me.

2:03 pm November, 18 Vin Douchal said...

“SOMMERVILLE ?!?!? Why not Everet or Chelsea?
.

.
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“Sandsharks”, from the meticulous mind of Cameron Larson. He’s the creator of such fare as “Xtinction: Predator X” and the soon to be released , “Glutton” about a 1200-pound man who is forced out of his bed to save his sister. He can only do so if he “sheds” his excess weight.
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Needless to say, the word dreck comes to mind

2:07 pm November, 18 Southern Scrotic said...

Turkey Hotness. Just in time for Thanksgiving.
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Gobble, gobble.

2:23 pm November, 18 hermit said...

Agent dancer=hooker with a pimp.

2:54 pm November, 18 DarkSock said...

Broga = downward douche
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Son.

3:15 pm November, 18 Et Tu Douche? said...

@Vin,
Somerville’s alright with me Redbones is good grub & back in the day caught some good acts right down the street at the Somerville Theater.
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Lord Shiva wept, as did I, when I read about “Broga”. Having done Yoga a few years back as a therapy for some lower back/hip issues I was skeptical at first. It was after a couple of sessions I realized it was actually helping to relieve the pain I was in and the fact that there were hot, sweaty chicks in all sorts of positions all over the room didn’t hurt. Yoga is allright in my book, Broga and getting into the “getting into the bro-zone’’ sounds ghey and by ghey I mean H-mo’s.
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Mila Kunis had me at “Yeah, I’ll get wasted with you on this wine. Fuck it. It’s good for you!”
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Mmmmmmm Pensive Bridge Pear!!!!!!!

3:16 pm November, 18 Juggalo 6 said...

Broga?!?!?WTF!!!!!! Do they turn their penises in at the door to be retrofitted with a vag? WTF!!! Then they graduate to their first set of small tits after completion of the first class?!?!?! WTF!!!!! Then what good will that do? “Hey baby, wanna see me bend my douchey ass in half while I find inner peace?” Doesn’t that just scream “look at me world!! I’m a poontang!!!”? Or how about “hey baby, I’m such a pussy I take Broga to get up on quality bro time” WTF!!!

3:24 pm November, 18 I R A Darth Aggie said...

Don’t jump, Pensive Bridge Pear! We can talk about whatever is bothering you. As long as I’m not bothering you.
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But if I am, jump, dammit!

4:07 pm November, 18 Wheezer said...

After their “broga” sessions, the bros like to head to Starbucks for some Pilattes.
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Crickets.

4:12 pm November, 18 Vin Douchal said...

Pilates. It’s all about Pilates. You get in a class around 10:00AM when the young moms have the kids at school. Be aloof. Make you like you hate everyone there then fantasize about hate fucking them as your back gets contorted back into place and feels good for a blissful 30 minutes of relief. Then the fuccen thing tightens back up and you have to go back to the 10mg Vicodin horsepills.
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Fucking Yoga sucks. Does not help a bad back. Sometimes in a one-on-one session with my little hippie Pilates gal, she bends me over this leather half-barrel fuccen thing and massages along my spine. When I feel like I’m gonna cum I figure that’s long enough, thank you. I’ve farted while she was doing that and she just giggles and farts back.
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Someday she’ll take up my offer to jerk me off with the tip of her pinky up ma ass while she’s back there. Not a gay thing if a cute little hippie chick is doing it. It’s medicinal. She smells nice, too. Like lilacs cooked in Olive Oil, which is probably her breakfast of choice…….
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Judgementalists

4:14 pm November, 18 Vin Douchal said...

What the fuck ^ ?
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Inside voice, Vin

4:41 pm November, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I didn’t unnerstand thgat Sommervile shit or vins yoga. I say chiropractors and heavy nacoticsa. Stoonesdddd. Sons.

5:18 pm November, 18 Nancy Dreuche said...

Don’t jump Pensive Bridge Pear, dudes is wankin it to your buttcheeks! You have a reason to live now.
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Hope everyone gets some major league pussy this weekend! I can’t wait till mine makes it to the bigs. I’m hoping for a sizeable sign on bonus and a lubrative career.

5:28 pm November, 18 Nancy Dreuche said...

Upon review, I would like to change my above comment to say sizeable sign on *boner*. Thank you for your patience.

6:44 pm November, 18 hermit said...

I’d lustfully slather Vicks Vapo Rub® over pensive bridge Jumper’s quivering, suicidal butt cheeks, then slurp succulent Nyquil® out of her ass crack like a thirsty dog lapping liquid from turd-laden waters.
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Billy Joe Mcallisters

8:37 pm November, 18 Doucheywallnuts said...

Sandsharks looks like a redux of Piranha, a fine bit of cinema starring Douche actor Jerry McConnell, or O’Donnell, and Kelly Brook. Some locations in the trailer looks like it was filmed where Jim Rockford had his trailer. Brooke Hogan looks like she has a cockk.
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Oklahoma State just lost.
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Cyclones.

8:40 pm November, 18 Doucheywallnuts said...

And Pensive Pear is All-Time Pear.
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Bartletts

9:22 pm November, 18 Vin Douchal said...
11:33 pm November, 18 Nostradouchus said...

She’s got the chin, and he needs one. Destiny?

2:21 am November, 19 michael landsdouche said...

http://theoatmeal.com/comics/hammer_vs_hipster

5:59 am November, 19 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Nancy Dreuche’ Song
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8:22 am November, 19 Nancy Dreuche said...

@Rev, so Canada is capable of putting out some good music. That’s refreshing.

9:21 am November, 19 tall guy said...

I can just see it now. Dreuche sitting on the staircase at a party swigging gin from the bottle and saying in a slurred voice, “shhhhhh, everyone!!! Shut up, this song’s about me!!!!!”

9:39 am November, 19 Nancy Dreuche said...

@guy, tall. Yes, I am so vain, I probably think the dildo song is about me.

10:18 am November, 19 tall guy said...

Semi-lol, Dreuche.

10:57 am November, 19 Choad The Douche Sprocket said...

I like Turkish hottness in my coffee…and doner kebabs….and Turk’s heads on the end of a stick.
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.The Fat Greek

7:14 am November, 20 CB Popped said...

Turk hott and Pensive Bridge Pear made my morning, thanks.

10:23 am November, 21 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

@ Nancy
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At least Rev Chad isn’t doing this:


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Although, I’m guessing this is how he really thinks of you:


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But then the love/hate relationship leads to this (I’m sure)

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