Monday, November 21, 2011

HCwDB of the Week: Band Promoter Petey and Barely Legal Bonnie

Beating out the hottness of Tiny Dancer Maria was no easy task, but Fratpud Juan just wasn’t douchey enough.

Band Promoter Petey, on the other hand, is a cavalanche (cavalcade + avalanche) of douchuous signifiers and toxic mockworthines.

And let’s not forget to give Barely Legal Bonnie her due.

She is melting cotton candy summer popsicle on a penguin slap hott.

Last week had Mike and Mandy from high school, Marty Trainwreck (with heinous tattoo chin fung innovation) and the tasty Persian Giggle Kelly with Zebra Tony.

That’s a lotta doucheballs.

And lets not forget the site’s new mascot: Douchepug.

But the decision’s been made by my drunk ass as we prepare for the last Monthly before the 2011 Douchies kick off.

And this be #3 of #4.

Now… microwavable oatmeal.

# posted by douchebag1
6:50 am November, 21 Medusa Oblongata said...

Douchepug.
.
Is nothing sacred?

6:52 am November, 21 SonnyChibaChoad said...

just your every utterance MO!

6:55 am November, 21 Et Tu Douche? said...

Can we come up with a better name for Douchepug? seeing that he’s our new mascot.

7:07 am November, 21 SonnyChibaChoad said...

King Poochoadouchous III

7:17 am November, 21 Nancy Dreuche said...

How bout Collaz B. Pupped?

7:55 am November, 21 Et Tu Douche? said...

How bout Lil’ D-Pug?

7:56 am November, 21 Douchble Helix said...

I understand the weekly decision. But that can’t be the last we see or discuss Tiny Dancer Maria’s heaving breastesses.

8:21 am November, 21 Nancy Dreuche said...

Douche Puggy Pug?

8:46 am November, 21 Southern Scrotic said...

Mindy and her pile of nuclear waste got robbed.
.
She needs to be put in the repechage round, which is conveniently located next to my bed.

9:02 am November, 21 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

I second that motion that we can not toss Tiny Dancer Maria into the trash heap of bag / hott losers. Way too hot. And I think Frat Pud Juan may have been holding back. He can kick up his A-game douchosity for another shot. There has to be additional photographic proof out there.

9:06 am November, 21 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Techno Pug?

9:20 am November, 21 tall guy said...

I think Tiny Dancer deserves recognition both for the sake of posterity and as starch bomb warning. Unfortunately we can do very little to remedy this malady of natural expansion. However our documenting of it may encourage research which goes on to promote its eventual eradication.

9:51 am November, 21 Mandouchian Candidate said...

Pugslap?

9:52 am November, 21 Nancy Dreuche said...

Butt Pug?

9:55 am November, 21 Nancy Dreuche said...

Fuck Pugslap! Slampug?

10:39 am November, 21 Vin Douchal said...

He Just Bangs BItches and Licks Himself

10:43 am November, 21 SonnyChibaChoad said...

Joey Pugsche Experience

10:44 am November, 21 SonnyChibaChoad said...

@VinD HJBBALH FTW!

10:48 am November, 21 Nancy Dreuche said...

Yes, I think we have a winner. HJBBALH.

11:03 am November, 21 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Possible wedding ring on BL Bonnie for the loss.

2:03 pm November, 21 Troy Tempest said...

He has a face like a sammich. Dry on the outside and full of meat on the inside. No brains, just meat.

2:14 am November, 22 CB Popped said...

This is a well deserved weekly. Hes got rockerdouche all over him.

Shes smarmy n sweet, but it that a wedding ring for the loss?

I feel so bad for the pug.

5:19 pm November, 23 Hermit said...

nepos

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