Monday, November 14, 2011

HCwDB of the Week: Entrepeneur Doug and Nadijka

This may not seem the obvious choice for HCwDB of the Week.

For while Nadijka brings obvious quality A-List hottmelt to the game, Doug may at first seem an average ‘bag. Not as douchey as, say, Mondrian ‘Bag, Tony the Bartender, or creepy-ass Herpster Melvin.

But take another look. For Doug is not an entrepreneur. He is an “Entrepeneur.” The former starts their own business with venture capital. The latter is a trust fund peen.

Anyone who advertises their crap label on their cap while busting chin fund and yellow wristdanna is mock worthy. And so they earn the Weekly.

And Nadijka. How I would powder puff her power puff girls and Dora her Exploras. Her purity of suckle thigh causes angels to buy real estate in Encino.

I will stalk her awkwardly with only a Frommers Guide and a felt pen. But first I need oatmeal.

# posted by douchebag1
7:32 am November, 14 Medusa Oblongata said...

The brim on that hat would make a great target. And I’m a poor shot.

7:42 am November, 14 fatness said...

“Chin fund”? The Chinese are in this now, too?

@medusa, then that wasn’t you across from LAR taking out ‘bags Saturday night?

7:50 am November, 14 Nancy Dreuche said...

You should probably Yo her Gabba Gabbas and Mister her Rogers while youre at it, DB1. I would like to spin this douche right round like a record baby right round, round, round. He would also be blindfolded and instead of pinning the tail on the donkey he would a disoriented honkey dropped off in the middle of Compton.

7:55 am November, 14 Nancy Dreuche said...

I would use his wristdana as a blindfold. Just trying to Tuffem him up is all. He’ll thank me later, from the hospital.

7:59 am November, 14 DarkSock said...

Why does he have a T-Shirt with an image of Plinky’s Mom’s junk on it?

8:03 am November, 14 CB Popped said...

We need more pics of Nadijka.

His brim is Disney – Esque, Donald Duck vibe and he’s wearing way too many rings.

His Tuffem sneer is nearly dildonic.

8:37 am November, 14 Hurl Scheibe said...

Tuff ’em Records for the evolving “trashbags” scene in Australia. How appropriate. Pick this guy up with a pooper scooper, deposit the droppings in a trash bag and problem solved. No fuss, no muss.

8:39 am November, 14 Hurl Scheibe said...

Wow. Tuff em up is a veritable petri dish for the Greico Virus.

http://www.trashbags.net.au/gallery/teenage-feat-smacktown-sat-23rd-july-2011/?nggpage=2

9:15 am November, 14 creature said...

he=wanker
she=goddess of wank projection

9:16 am November, 14 Nancy Dreuche said...

I hope he’s also a DJ, that would be doubly neat.

9:37 am November, 14 Choad The Douche Sprocket said...

@Nancy Dreuche: you just know that he IS a DJ….and uses his cool playlists to bag the babes….the kind of women who like to watch other people play music recorded by others….and think it’s a good time.
.
.
.Luckily, they found each other.

9:44 am November, 14 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I’d Berkshire her Hathaways.

9:56 am November, 14 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Does Sponge Bob Squrepants know what happened to all his of swag hats?

10:01 am November, 14 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

If you flip the brim down the hat reads “Favre 4ever!”.

10:02 am November, 14 online sázení said...

what a douche…:)))

10:06 am November, 14 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

If you flip her skirt up heart-shaped glitter bursts forth from her angelic rose blossom, the air fills with the scent of Jasmine, a string quartet plays love songs in the key of Dminor, and somewhere in Melbourne a Dingo eats another baby.

10:11 am November, 14 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

That glass she’s holding started out as a little shotglass. With every sip and stroke of her delicate yet firm fingers its gotten bigger. In about an hour she’ll be holding one of these with a load of foam sprayed into her hair.
.

10:21 am November, 14 tall guy said...

From first glance I didn’t like this scote. For me that’s really saying something because I give most folk the benefit of the doubt. Then I heard he was Australian. Why is it (advanced notice for a rhetorical question, fellow ‘Bagsters) that every time a picture of an Aussie douche appears on the site I get a sense of having seen ’em before. (?) We’re a young country with a small population, which is largely centred on our coastal regions. Surely the Greico strain isn’t so concentrated in my little neck of the woods! If so I’m seriously thinking of moving elsewhere. And these days I rarely even go out at night, let alone to anyplace where I’m likely to bump into such obvious examples of douche. This is perplexing. My only conclusion is he comes from a small country town (called New Zealand).
I read his record companies site, too – well, I read as much as I could before feeling like I’d died and gone to boredom hell. Man, those photos!

10:50 am November, 14 idfma said...

That hat alone warrants execution by coating him in honey and burying him neck deep next to a fire ant colony.
.
He could have no other douche signifiers, and that hat secures him in the Hall of Scrote in my book. That hat is like a 6 pound watch, orange spray tan, spiked/gelled hair, douche hand gesture #424, and stackhouse’s poetry all rolled into one. Don’t get me started on the dumbfuck ‘hard’ expression on his face–he couldn’t kick a soccer ball, much less anybody’s ass.

6:34 pm November, 14 Nostradouchus said...

Awesome. Now he can go get another TOTALLY ORIGINAL tribal arm tat.

9:16 pm November, 14 Medusa Oblongata said...

@ Fatness– *Whistling, rolling my eyes* I dunno what you’re talking about.

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