Tuesday, December 27, 2011

You Know Who Enjoys The Break Between Christmas and New Years?

Mack and C-Dog do, yo.

Don’t be frontin’.

They serious.

90 Degree 2005 Ashton Kutcher Hat Tilt Serious.

Sweet Beer Drinking Brenda has disinterested parents. Who aren’t paying enough attention to her nocturnal activities now that she’s back from Nevada State for the break.

# posted by douchebag1
7:05 am December, 27 Ted Brogan said...

I’d check her ID, if you know what I mean…

7:26 am December, 27 Et Tu Douche? said...

Loves me some Sweet Beer Drinking Brenda. Her sweet, yet sneaky naughty, smile warms my bones on this chilly rainy morn. Her boobs look like they have a lot o potential.

7:34 am December, 27 Wheezer said...

Yo, C-Dawg, y’all keep workin’ dat grill, homeboy! Y’all ‘n dat Jiffy Pop lid gon’ be blowin’ all up in herre! Word…..

7:37 am December, 27 Wheezer said...

Mack’s only “Moments of Change” come when he goes couch divin’, yo.

7:40 am December, 27 Douchble Helix said...

Bro has a Jiffy Pop balanced precariously on his noggin.

7:45 am December, 27 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I bet she’s wearing Love’s Baby Soft because her mom doesn’t want her smelling like a whore. Little does mother know that there are men thrice her age who would like to smell the dirty little spots where she applies said pubescent fragrance and mount her with the aplomb they did so many years ago before the problems.
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That being said Rev Chad scored a bottle of 240 expired Vicodin and a bottle of fresh Xanax for when he gets the itch from a sympathetic elder sick of my whining. And by itch I mean soul-crushing pain. I also got my tiny Handycam for continued abuse of the po-po when they are seen harassing my fellow free men and ladies. Best present was my sausage grinder cause I’m going all free fucking range sausage mad for the next for months. No blowies this year except from the Mrs. She’s getting pretty sick of the perversions needed to get the big old boy stiff anymore. But I can’t figure out why no one buys me liquor anymore. Fucking Al-Anon cocksuckers.
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Best wishes for the in-between time. New Year Day party will be filled with painkiller shooters, tranquilizer chili, and Herb filled sausage links. By Herb I mean weed. And by weed I mean Giants for Superbowl 46 or whatever the fuck it is. But I’m loaded. Did Nancy get serviced this year? Is Creature back after his breakdown last week? I gotta play a tune.

7:52 am December, 27 Nancy Dreuche said...

Finally a non bleeth up in here. But if she spends more time with the Wing Wang twins she soon be one.
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@Rev, a las, no, much like a cell phone in the back of your van I didn’t get any service this year.

7:53 am December, 27 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

An appropriate day after the day after the farce song has always proven to be Ted Nugent.
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Cause nothing says fun like a crazed dude who hunts hogs with spears and I’m fucking loaded with countless intoxicants. Son.

8:13 am December, 27 Et Tu Douche? said...

Good to see that Lenny the Box came through for the Rev this holiday season. I mean who would think to give a sausage grinder for a gift.

8:22 am December, 27 RAPETIME said...

Brenda has nice bumpers.

8:23 am December, 27 Nancy Dreuche said...

@Et Tu, I thought sausage grinder was a euphemism.

8:57 am December, 27 Whoop-di-douche said...

Brenda’s boobs appear to be the real thing-things,
Of she I sing sing.
Unfortunately, dem douchebags are also the real thang-thangs.
The visual equivalent of irritating clang-clangs.
Dang-dang.

8:58 am December, 27 CB "Jiffy Popped" said...

^ Douche Helix 7:40 FTW.

HA. Bro’s wearing a jiffy pop bag at at 45 degree tilt.

9:27 am December, 27 tall guy said...

Yo, Kroeger, I own a sausage grinder. Mine is a regular meat grinder with a sausage making attachment. Today I plan on eating kangaroo burgers for lunch. ‘Roo meat: it’s lean’n’tasty! Get busy posting those sausage making recipes, dude!

Fucking Al-Anons!

Skippy the bush kangaroo

9:38 am December, 27 Nancy Dreuche said...

@tall guy, asking another guy to post sausage recipes? Hmmm. Can we make a pact that we will both get some much needed some before the year is up? I don’t think I could bear having this place become a recipe sharing coffee clatch. Speaking of which, how’s the interior decor of your man cave coming along Rev? Does the carpet match the drapes?

9:56 am December, 27 tall guy said...

Dreuche, remember how you thought ‘sausage grinder was a euphemism’? Hold that thought.
confused.

10:05 am December, 27 Nostradouchus said...

“They serious”….

….ly need a hat wearing tutorial.

Dude in the middle doesn’t have a boner, either. It’s the pants. I swear.

10:07 am December, 27 tall guy said...

Also, that raised hat look sucks. I remember walking around Thorpe Park, London a few years ago with the lady who soon became my ex-wife. A group of bros sported similarly ridiculous headwear as well as the boxers raised above the jeans waist look. The coolness of this was lost on me.

11:20 am December, 27 Choad The Douche Sprocket said...

Brenda can be seen performing nightly at Little Darlings on Western Avenue…to raise bail for C-Dog….’cuz he was…like nice to her….and because Mack loves her. He told her once.

11:26 am December, 27 Mock Turtle said...

Offtopic (On topic would be how much Brenda reminds me of Kate Bosworth in Blue Crush), but Judges must be disinterested in the cases they try. No family or money *interest* in either side. Brenda’s parents are UNinterested.

Also, these guys are LOSERS, and when you LOSE, it is not spelled “Loose”. That one is much, much worse than misunderstanding “disinterested”, so I’ll count my blessings.

12:15 pm December, 27 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Ah, sweet little Brenda. I’d give my left nut to trade places with the foam on her beer.
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And have her load me up in a beer bong and funnel me into her vagina.

12:16 pm December, 27 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Wait, what?

12:47 pm December, 27 Nancy Dreuche said...

@Mock Turtle, what is the definition of squee then if you’re so smart?

12:48 pm December, 27 creature said...

new show on NBC, “Skuzzy Douche You Eat Poo!”
…sensing another abyssmal ratings performance

12:52 pm December, 27 creature said...

…cast members include ‘Snatchy, ‘Itchy’ & ‘Scraggy’
other 7 dwarve like characters include: ‘Contagious’,’Inflamation’, ‘Droopy’, ‘Discharge’ & the ever present hostess ‘Chlymydia’

1:06 pm December, 27 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Must have been a slow night at the food courts Chic Fil A and the manager let them go early. That lip fung looks better on John Waters.
_
_
_
_
Training bra Bleeth

1:06 pm December, 27 Vin Douchal said...

Two anal warts impersonating Vanilla Ice and a Milli or a Vanilli
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I guarantee ya her parents would be very interested in meeting these two guys especially after WalMart approved dad’s shotgun permit
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5 million YouTube hits, yo ^

1:34 pm December, 27 The Dude said...

Sweet Booble Brenda for Hall of Naturals.

4:16 pm December, 27 Doucheywallnuts said...

I don’t usually have sympathy for my fellow man, or woman for that matter, but I think I am starting to feel sorry for the black man. Not only is “the man” against them and they think the rap music and the Basketball are the only ways to get ahead, but they have started to migrate towards full-blown doucheitude. Woe is the black man…

4:40 pm December, 27 Wedgie said...

I don’t usually have sympathy for my fellow man, either. And today is no fuccen exception.
Assholios.

6:24 pm December, 27 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I have no sympathy for my brethren of the humanoid race in North America. The yuppie generation before us has wreaked chaos on the financial markets with the greed forced upon them by their parents who once wore uniforms of pride and respect for Judeo-Christian history and conformity. Not forces like a muzzle on an American German Shepard destined for malaise and hip-dysplacia. But forces of a generation under God and God-damned determined not to let it happen again.
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A Great generation which never lost the smell of the hunger of the Great Depression nor the bi-millenial show of bravery in taming a rancid foe. They returned poor and uneducated save fo a few elites and turned a once insular country into a historical force of moral and visionary turpitude. A frugal generation of savers, builders, and flag waving America Firsters.
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Their children, the apathetic cruisers of the original clay wheeled skateboards and hulla-hoops scorning their superior parents in a pagan dance of hippie counter-culturalism. Protesting the military industrial complex which paid for their anarchy. Poseurs to the inevitable mega-generational wealth transfer to fund another phalanx of Acuras and Kia Sportages oblivious to the nation destroying consumptionary patterns their witty entitled degrees with which they fornicated and funded the suburban prisons in which they wither and shive the nights away knowing that their children will never have the same opportunity and puke into the inter-generational spittoon leaving their progent to scrape clean while the Indians call us at suppertime to sell yet another service paln for the I-Pad of Armageddon.
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And spend they will leaving nary a trace of the fortunes of a Great Generation. Their children disowned and disenfranchised in a quagmire of globalization. One day they meet their grandchildren and ask, ” Can I supersize that?”

6:28 pm December, 27 McCrude said...

Dude is cookin jiffy pop in his lid. Mad props for snack food headwear.

6:30 pm December, 27 McCrude said...

Frick. D.H. Beat me to it. Neverfuckinmind.

7:13 pm December, 27 Douchble Helix said...

You’re OK, McCrude. I need not gloat.
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ps “Neverfuckinmind.” made my day!

7:52 pm December, 27 DarkSock said...

Git outa moy kunt-tray, ya jiffy-poofs.
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Clay-wheeled skateboarders.

8:50 pm December, 27 Nancy Dreuche said...

@ Rev Chad 6:24p, almost sensical. What gives?
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.
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Burning mullato souls

9:25 pm December, 27 Stephanie said...

I don’t usually feel sorry for these people,but this Brenda,this will most likely be her last photo before she turns into a trouble making early jail chick because of the the small time dopes she’s hanging out with. They’re dope alright. Maybe she’ll learn a few things before it’s too late. She’s a Bambi caught in the headlights.

9:39 pm December, 27 Medusa Oblongata said...

Weeping for the future of Rev. Chad’s description. A future in which girls like Brenda here drink away their lives before they’ve even begun. Looks like the future is, indeed, now.

10:33 pm December, 27 Jacques Doucheteau said...

Though the legality of a rapidly aging thirty-something like myself going all Stieg Larsson on Brenda’s cotton candy fragrance scented hymen bejeweled nudity may be inappropriate in modern society, it is not inherently amoral from an anthropological perspective.
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Young women who have just exited the transformation of pubescence, are of prime fertility and the greatest capacity for breeding many offspring until their ovaries dry up and their uterus falls out at forty-six. To not inseminate them (repeatedly and aided with double-tipped jelly dongs) would be to deny our reproductive nature and survival as a species.
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I.e., if she’s old enough to go to the store, she’s old enough to get bred.

6:54 am December, 28 SMOOT said...

ME LIKE JIFFY POP POPCORN
ITS GROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD

7:02 am December, 28 DarkSock said...

Jacques, that’s going to be my closing argument to the Judge. Much better than “she had a forged ID”.
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Darwinians.

7:04 am December, 28 DarkSock said...

Smoot – his head is full of delicious Jiffy Pop; crack it open now!

9:46 am December, 28 creature said...

‘Look at the Brain on C-Dog!’
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git outta me cuntray…prick!
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hopheds

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