Monday, January 2, 2012
Lets Do This Thing
Gearin’ up to fire up the Mock in the New Year, your humble narrator is stubbly, scratchy, and well post-imbibed from a night of half-awake revelry, cheesecake and Johnny Walker Black.
But our work is not done.
For there are Fratbros shouting “Bro!” in presence of Woo Hott Suckle Thigh.
And the intertextual mock must continue.
And Kimberly on Deck 3 likes to play shuffleboard with a large vibrating egg and black soap.
But first, a HoHo.
I’d like to see more of blondie. More of her with less on that is. Men wearing sarongs? Never flies. Fact!
Fag Hags with Boat Bags. These guys goes down on each other faster than the Saints get savaged in their superdome (no respect ) by the Motor City Marauders next week.
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DarkSock here….And then you woke up, you sad addled hockey schtick…There’s nothing worse than a man in the depths of an ether binge (Hunter S. Thompson).
Geaux, Saints!
Saints – 24
Packers – 17
Indianapolis, IN – February 5, 2012 at Lucas Oil Stadium.
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Who-Datters.
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– D.S>
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Dude front and center needs a bra. The blonde next to him doesn’t.
What is that amorphous sack of shit in the background? It looks like someone gave John Largeman a forcible sex change and a lobotomy.
Taking a break from Sandals this year, eh? But hey, it’s your two weeks away from your jobs in the accounting dept at the Abercrombie and Fitch regional business office in Columbus, spend it however you like. Man sarong 1 and 2 without a doubt will be receiving regular doses of penis colada for the duration of the voyage. WTF is Patton Oswalt doing in the background?
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Sailors
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Those dudes make me want to drop-kick baby cheetahs and push retarded Norwegians down flights of stairs.
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Halter-top Heidi makes me want to Lemon Pledge® her pickle slit with a damp sponge.
Pool cover-ups are for bleeths, not dudes. And by that I mean I’d like to swab the blonde’s poop deck with my helmeted mop.
@ DB1: hey jackass, how about giving your boy here a little credit for the Valentino link!
All receive ‘notta’ passes. Whatever these two broads we just met wanna do, I’m there.
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Just put your goddam camera away, ‘bag.
Bondie’s got the serious bed hair. I’d like to sticky it up a little more with my homemade fist gravy
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Ladlers
The two sarong cowboys think they’re on a fashion runway,
and they should be walking the plank.
Blonde on left is giving me a pants crisis.
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Hip pointers
Weekend at Bernie’s: The Prequel (When Bernie was younger and alive.)
latest bag trend, wear your soiled bungwad around yer boardies….Ethyl Mermen serenades from behind
…& by serenades I mean ungreezd fisting!
Dude in the middle needs a bra, and by “bra”, I mean boob apparel.
Yeah, I saw some stuff there that was disagreeable, but then I kept going back to blondie. Not my type, but strangely sooooo my type. She looks like she makes out with chicks. Fuck yeah.
10 points to Hufflepuff for Hermit’s “Pickle Slit”.
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And by “Hufflepuff” I mean “Huffin’ Stuff”.
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Huffing-Some Posts
“Whats the name of your band?”
“Pickleslit”.
I think next door brunette on the left would also be fun on a cruise ship.
The hovel is about 45 mins. From Lucas Oil Stadium, so I’ll pledge, if the Saints and Packers play in the Superbowl I’ll run naked through the half-time show and tongue-punch Maddona’s pickle-slit on national television.