Thursday, January 5, 2012

The Bleeth

For those unclear on the concept of what happens when a woman becomes a trashed out garish douchebaguette Bleeth, here’s proof positive.

EDIT: There’s only one cure for having viewed this atrocity, and it is Alba Pear.

# posted by douchebag1
9:55 am January, 5 tall guy said...

I am grateful to have eaten a light breakfast of toasted pane di casa spread w/ homemade marmalade & coffee. Similarly my gratitude runs high for the dump I took just now. Twice already this week I have gone for an early surf being in the water right on sun up. This morning Sydney’s less than inspiring weather (and mediocre swell) has me thinking whether or not I’ll hit what waves there are. Although after looking at this picture I feel strongly for the necessity of a soul cleansing that for me only comes from a dip in the vast South Pacific ocean.

10:03 am January, 5 Steve said...

this picture looks familiar. That “outfit’ looks familiar. I think i remember seeing this pics like, a decade ago. I think that’s R&B singer Toni Braxton.

As for the eventual results of bleeths living the bleethed out life-style, get ’em while they’re young. 18 till mid or late 20’s, depending on frequency and mileage of said Bleeth.

Submitted for your approval:

A Bleeth over 30

Is way too dirty.

10:12 am January, 5 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Looks like an x-rated cello with exceptionally taut strings and a sketchy looking f-hole.

10:20 am January, 5 DontFearTheReaper said...

That’s not Toni Braxton, but, it is reeeeally fucking old. OG bleeth.

10:24 am January, 5 Wedgie said...

Yeah, you’re right. Hang up the fuccen phone already.

10:28 am January, 5 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

I swear to god Boss, if you post a picture of her from the back ala Crotchos, I will fill a burlap sack full of kittens and broken Chi-o-Sticks, find out where you live, hide inside your rarely used recycling container on the weedy side of the carport fence, and when you come out for your monthly dumping of Ho-Ho wrappers, I will pop up and beat you with said sack of kittens and Chic-O-Stick bits until the sound of meowling kittens co-mingled with your girlish shrieking is so loud that your neighbor finally comes out in his robe and shouts above the din “Yo! Louis, if yer filming those pornos again in yer hottub I’m callin the cops. I’m not f*ckin around this time. You got me?!”

10:29 am January, 5 Choad The Douche Sprocket said...

I think she gave me a lap dance at Cheetah’s….in 1993.

10:32 am January, 5 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

And for this scabomination you owe us more Champagne Katie.

.

.

.

Bastard.

10:39 am January, 5 Tits McGee said...

Isn’t she too old to be wearing a Kotex?

10:48 am January, 5 Ferris said...

“Excuse me, ma’am? Your uterus is showing.”

Crotchless white stretchpants. Wonder why those never caught on?

10:54 am January, 5 Vin Douchal said...

Not Toni Braxton but her sister , Tamar…

.

I apologize in advance

11:04 am January, 5 jonezy said...

anyone with me when I say Pheobe Cates was the original Jessica Alba?

.

I was (re)watching Private School last night, where Pheobe is a ripe 19, and it is honestly my favorite 80s movie now. Pheobe gets decently nude at the end, but I’m not sure I recall much ass-bearing in Alba’s “career”.

.

Plus, Alba is married to a guy named $$.

11:05 am January, 5 jonezy said...

also regarding the pic, I had to check the site banner after thinking I was on my other favorite blog, Fat Chicks with HotBags.

11:08 am January, 5 UFO Destroyers said...

^Vin,

I thought I read “Tarmal.” That’s the only reason I clicked the link. Now I need a squeege, bleach, a Shop-Vac, a freshly-shorn alpaca, and a new pair of Dockers, thank you very much.

11:17 am January, 5 Wedgie said...

Jonezy:

Betsy Russell stole that movie. And she gets bonus points for not being Canadian. San Diego girl through and through. Girls like her are one of the reasons we tolerate the Chargers down here.

11:45 am January, 5 Nancy Dreuche said...

Um I cant believe I’m yearning for the days of actual GSR. This is GNSR, and it is gnarly.

11:46 am January, 5 DarkSock said...

Cougar?

.

.

Poogar.

11:47 am January, 5 DarkSock said...

She must smell like a rotting donkey head fermenting in a vat of smashed baboon assholes in the Georgia August sun.

11:47 am January, 5 Nancy Dreuche said...

@ Jonezy There’s a Fat Chicks With Hotbags? Is it run by WhiteSock and Hotbag1? I’m down to check out the comp. Maybe there’s a bizarro me over there too. I mean more bizarro.

12:42 pm January, 5 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

@jonezy, I don’t see much in common between Cates and Alba, although both are supernova hot. Cates bared more in a movie called Paradise (a blue lagoon ripoff). Alba got a bare-assed spanking in more recent movie whose name escapes me.

12:55 pm January, 5 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

OK, so which one of us pissed the Boss off? Hmmmmmmmm? It seems like he’s making us all pay for the sin(s) of one of us:

.

.

So ‘fess up now so you don’t get a towel party later.

1:39 pm January, 5 The Royal Scam said...

Short term remedy: bleach and Brillo pads to clean the eyeballs.

Long term remedy: become celibate Buddhist monk somewhere very, very far away.

2:49 pm January, 5 YA said...

Toni Braxtons’ sister!

2:53 pm January, 5 Xanadouche said...

I have heard this disaster referred to as a Hot Ghetto Mess. I believe there exists several web sites dedicated to this type of mess. Google if you dare.

4:49 pm January, 5 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

This site is getting weirder. That is most definitely the Queen of Bone, Vivica A. Mox.

5:47 pm January, 5 Medusa Oblongata said...

Is Betsy Russell any relation to Keri Russell? They look a lot a like and I’m too sick and lazy to find out for myself.

.

That being said….This photo…..the new spring fashion line from Lady Porch Beef.

7:27 pm January, 5 Stephanie said...

Where does this women shop? Or does she just buy something and rip it apart? I know,I know, she shops at Attention Whoremart.

7:53 pm January, 5 Douchble Helix said...

Vin Douchal must be stopped.

4:28 am January, 6 Nostradouchus said...

That is def Braxton and her boobies….and her boobies.

Can’t say I was all that impressed with Alba pear. Girl needs a burger, but I’d still hit it. Take a cue from Toni, Jesse…

8:10 am January, 6 I R A Darth Aggie said...

Double-size my order of bewbs, and I’ll have a side of crotch fleas, please.

.

Must. Use. Brain. Bleach.

6:14 pm January, 6 Voulez-vous douchez? said...

Why even bother with the pants?

5:28 am January, 9 CB Popped said...

Id flip Alba Pear like a burger.

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