Thursday, February 23, 2012

Cheeto Man Lives!

And by lives, I mean stalking wayward Eurohotties like a mutant sentient carrot.

# posted by douchebag1
10:17 am February, 23 soy bomb said...

Where’s a feral, mutant bunny rabbit when you need one?

10:18 am February, 23 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Good Fuccen God Boss, you gotta warn a brother better before throwin’ that second pic out there. Oh, sure put some inane verbage to make the link appear but then then sweet Mother of Mercy that there’s some scary fuccen shit! That thing in the middle will give me nightmare like

these.

10:23 am February, 23 Ted Brogan said...

This picture is terrifying!

10:28 am February, 23 Geoffrey said...

fk

10:30 am February, 23 Nancy Dreuche said...

Hermione sure can pull the Orange ambiguously sexual douche.

10:32 am February, 23 Sergeant Scrote Stain said...

No!

.

NO!!! NO! NO! NO!

.

NNNNOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

.

Kill it! Kill it! Medusa, do your scary, “I will eat your children and boil your kneecaps in chimp blood” thing.

10:35 am February, 23 Nancy Dreuche said...

He’s wearing more lip gloss than all three of his fhag hags. I’m pretty sure that breaks protocol. If this guy is straight, I weep for women everywhere.

10:38 am February, 23 Los Douches said...

don’t stop pulling the trigger until the magazine is empty

10:45 am February, 23 icame isaw idouched said...

On your knees Cheeto Man!!

10:55 am February, 23 Vin Douchal said...

He looks like Don King’s first shit post-chemotherapy

10:56 am February, 23 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

We thought that only Americans added color to cheese.

.

Krafts

11:25 am February, 23 army (ret) douche said...

lets cross breed this thing and four prong.

.

.

.

Scientific curiosity

11:30 am February, 23 Capt. James T. Douche said...

That’s one frosty carrot poo!!! Flush that mofo and put it out of it’s misery!

12:03 pm February, 23 Nancy Dreuche said...

@army (ret), usually I’m all for experimentation but I’m not sure society could handle a CheetoProng.

12:03 pm February, 23 I R A Darth Aggie said...

I’ll going to be spending some quality time with Ms. Little Black Dress and my imagination…

12:07 pm February, 23 tall guy said...

Skinny blond on left looks barely legal. She also looks like she’s had more than a mile of cock up her. Those licentious Euros.

12:15 pm February, 23 Doucheywallnuts said...

And to think for years we have been told that AIDS/HIV is a killer.

12:17 pm February, 23 Doucheywallnuts said...

“So two anorexic skanks and a gay orange guy walk into a bar…”

12:18 pm February, 23 Doucheywallnuts said...

New advertising campaign; “Bombay Saphire; The Gin for Fuccen Losers!”

12:20 pm February, 23 jonezy said...

there is no word that rhymes with him

12:21 pm February, 23 jonezy said...

dude gets served with Blue Moon

12:22 pm February, 23 Nancy Dreuche said...

@tall guy, don’t you mean she look like shes had roughly 1.609km of cock up her?

.

.

.

.

Metric Jyzztem

12:23 pm February, 23 jonezy said...

actually, he’s really more of a clementine than anything

12:24 pm February, 23 Nancy Dreuche said...

@Jonezy, damnit now everytime I drink a Blue Moon I’m gonna think of this Orange abomination. It is a mighty good combo though. Have you ever tried the beer Orange Kush?

12:29 pm February, 23 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

This guy does make Bombay Sapphire gin gay. He also makes GQ and Brokeback Mountain kind of gay too..Wait

12:32 pm February, 23 tall guy said...

Okay, off topic question that I hope one of you might answer please.

.

By road, by which I mean driving a car, approximately how long to travel from San Francisco to Los Angeles? I understand there are several variables, but for sake of brevity I shall say using a coastal route if possible and from city limits SF to Ventura Highway LA?

.

Help.

12:32 pm February, 23 The Dude said...

The blondes are doing a Trump-style comb over their fiveheads.

12:39 pm February, 23 jonezy said...

I can’t tell if Orange Kush is legitimately a beer, but I have consumed many kushes. In fact, I’m currently working through a, er, “quantity” of strawberry kush.

.

As for tall guy, SD to LA is 2.5 to 4 hours depending mostly on traffic but really just on the route, either the fast highway (the 5, aka Interstate 5) or the beach front highway, aka PCH (Pacific Coast highway).

.

Being that you seem to like the surf, you should take PCH, stop by Newport or Huntington Beach for a surf in Orange County, then make your way up to LA.

.

Point is, it is a very easy drive.

12:48 pm February, 23 Vin Douchal said...

@ Tall Guy.

.

Fly. Driving in California is a life/death axis of near misses, uninsured lead-footed maniacs hellbent on running you off the road, assholes driving 35 MPH in the fast lane , Wild West-like armed road ragers coupled with screeching freeway traffic halts that could last hours at a time , construction projects clogging the lanes at the worst possible moments and potholes the size of moon craters.

.

Unless you have patience hitherto inseen by modern science, by all means, take the plane. It’s under $100 (about the same gas cost driving considering it’s about to hit $ 5.00 a gallon any day now) to fly, the stewardesses in California will fuck the meekest of foreigners – with your accent they’ll eat out of the palm of your hand, mate, and it takes about 45 minutes to get there.

.

Yeah, yeah , the drive down the PCH is beautiful, blah blah. Fuck that, just google “Big Sur” and you’ve seen all you need to see .

.

Trust me on this

2:31 pm February, 23 tall guy said...

Big thanks to jonezy and Vin Douchal for the information. Looks like flying is the way to go. Bonus being I stand half a chance of arriving. Plus, what if I ran into Cheeto Man in Orange County? Fuck that shit!

2:36 pm February, 23 jonezy said...

^ you know, I totally fucked up that logic and gave you directions from San Diego. You’d have more fun starting there rather than San Fran anyway, but that was intructions from the southern most of Cali headed north to LA.

.

I’ve made San Fran to LA in under 6 hours on the 5, but more typical is 7-8 hours

2:38 pm February, 23 jonezy said...

also, I can’t remember the last time I’ve been driving around San Fran and NOT got lost.

2:41 pm February, 23 troy tempest said...

Yeah – flying is faster – you can rent a car when you get to LA. In fact, you’ll have to – the public transit system is craptastic. It’s about 400 miles from SF to LA, and if your car gets 25mpg that’s 16 gallons of gas to get there and 16 back – 32 gallons of gas @ $4.25 a gallon = $136. Yarf.

3:02 pm February, 23 Baron Von Goolo said...

“…Son?”

3:04 pm February, 23 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

@ tall guy

.

Must agree with all of the above about SF to LA. If you HAVE to do anything in SF use the BART. It’s not that bad of a metro system and it goes most places. If not, you can easily get a cab to where you need to be. Driving from SF to LA = fuccen nightmare as Vin said. He must have seen me at one time because I’m one of those gun-totin’ road ragers he speaks of. That’s just ’cause people piss me off in general. Put them behind the wheel and give them a fuccen mobile phone and I go ballistic. Flying = much cheaper and much easier. LAX is big and has lots of shit in it. SFO big and cavernous but not the greatest. Besides, your accent + blonde stewardesses should = loss of ideas about German and nookie.

3:05 pm February, 23 Baron Von Goolo said...

@ soy bomb 10:17am

.

Right here, baby.

3:21 pm February, 23 Vin Douchal said...

Jonezy: Dude said San Fran not San Diego. The drive up from SD is not the nightmarish hell that is the SF to LA drive although you are more likely to be kidnapped for ransom by a Mexican gang wearing bandeleros , which I hear is a hoot : great food dishes, beautiful women, the music is touching and faithful religious rituals abound from our wonderful neighbors to the south

3:21 pm February, 23 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

@ Baron

.

I thought you were gonna go with

the obvious.

4:45 pm February, 23 DoucheyWallnuts said...

I did the SF to LaJolla/SD drive a while back and it was quite enjoyable. And by that I mean I drilled enough Mogambo to make Leo DiCaprio blush. Blush, I says.

5:35 pm February, 23 Douchble Helix said...

Great clips, boys! Isn’t the tag missing from the MP, though?

.

Something like, “That rabbit’s dynamite!” ?

6:13 pm February, 23 Nostradouchus said...

lol at the shiny lips. Is the tangerine wearing lip gloss?

6:37 pm February, 23 Voulez-vous douchez? said...

These are elves trying to pass themselves off as anorexic euroclubbers. The orange one just needs more practice.

8:11 pm February, 23 Stephanie said...

Carotene Clown of sexual ambiguity. And there’s just not enough hair on the girls’ foreheads to cover their large Neanderthal brows. What a mess.

8:32 pm February, 23 Little Willie said...

The tranny in the middle with lip gloss has sucked more cock and taken more dick up the ass than either of the two skanks combined.

9:48 pm February, 23 Wedgie said...

Driving from San Francisco to Los Angeles is only fun on the coast, but it takes two days to do it right. Highway 1; you can’t go fast, but it’s beautiful and worth the effort. Go through Carmel, the only town in Cali smart enough to have elected Clint Eastwood mayor.

If you can, rent an old bathtub Porsche 356 ragtop and go in style. With a blonde honey to keep you company.

Shit, I might have to go myself after that sales pitch.

11:39 am February, 24 Bret Easton Douchis said...

Overheard at Gio’s Bar last night;

.

“It’s not gay if you’re THAT orange…”

.

Also overheard….the worst pickup line ever;

.

“Mind if I push in your stool?”

.

1:02 pm February, 25 Wheezer said...

How about freaky bunnies?

1:35 pm February, 26 Colossus of Choads said...

Bwaahahaa.

I love this guy.

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