Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Coleman Goes to Vegas

Between Coleman’s eyeliner and Suzy’s lack of sandwich consumption, lets just move on.

# posted by douchebag1
12:34 pm February, 29 Wedgie said...

Coleman’s sorry ass has been on this site before. Skinny Suzy has not.

I’ve got yer sammich right here, girl. Canadian Bacon and creamy man sauce. Yummy..

12:35 pm February, 29 wonderdouche twin said...

Damn Suzy eat a Ruben on Rye or something! there is a thing as too skinny, this is it.

12:47 pm February, 29 Colossus of Choads said...

Starry Blight?

12:53 pm February, 29 Bueller said...

Yummy Kelli Hutcherson nom nom nom

12:56 pm February, 29 I R A Darth Aggie said...

Yeah, she could stand some burgers and fries, followed by some wings, and wash it all down with Jack & Coke. And that FGSR, holy cow that’s a lot of FGSR.

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And I’d hit it. I may regret doing so after the fact, but that’s life…

1:01 pm February, 29 Eliza Douchecoo said...

Looks like the King of Sears and Hello Kitty before all the herpes implants.

1:04 pm February, 29 Vin Douchal said...

This MMA model chick is good news for us , ahem, less than tough types. She’s with this not so manly cat so maybe we have a chance verses the muscle heads?

1:06 pm February, 29 Wheezer said...

Yep, that does kinda resemble King Sharty, but with a shirt on! Is he learning to stop acting like an assclown, albeit slowly?

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“Yes, Wheezer,” you say, “he is a slow learner.”

1:06 pm February, 29 Wedgie said...

Starry Blight & King of Sears is the same guy. Now he is Coleman.

Look, changing your name doesn’t make you less of a dick. You know that, right? And the guyliner doesn’t help you, either.

1:07 pm February, 29 Vin Douchal said...

This dude has the expression of a dead fish. Let’s call him “Carp Slap”

1:07 pm February, 29 Wedgie said...

At least she’s got the GSR done right.

1:08 pm February, 29 Doucheywallnuts said...

Is that the cocksucker from American Idol, Adam Lambert?

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Aneorexic chicks are hot until their hair start falling out and they smell of piss and vomit.

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Andy Williams would split this poor dame in half.

1:10 pm February, 29 Doucheywallnuts said...

BTW, Suzy is almost giving us the MCR; Meat Curtains Reveal.

1:14 pm February, 29 Vin Douchal said...

Her fingers are so long she could fish a quarter out of a gas tank

1:18 pm February, 29 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

If you starve a hottie for a while she becomes more compliant and also craves the cocc. Medical fact. Nice example of the good kind of GSR.

1:21 pm February, 29 Sir Huddleston Fuddleston said...

Skinny, yes, but man, the filthy filthy things I would do to her.

1:21 pm February, 29 DarkSock said...

her bikini bottom’s so low I can almost see her Sandy Squirrel.

1:22 pm February, 29 DarkSock said...

her bikini bottom’s so low you can see her fart.

1:22 pm February, 29 Sir Huddleston Fuddleston said...

Given the eyeliner, shouldn’t he be “Kohlman”?

1:22 pm February, 29 DarkSock said...

her bikini bottom’s so low she trips when she runs

1:23 pm February, 29 DarkSock said...

Regarding Guyliner Guy: Maybe he’s the lead singer for Poo October.

1:25 pm February, 29 Wedgie said...

BTW, congrats to Rev Chad & Snooki on their love child. Way to go, Rev. The shock of reading about your exploits caused Davy Jones to have a heart attack.

Monkey Hole.

1:32 pm February, 29 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I like skinny girls. They squeal and eat salad. When you ass fuck them the dirtiest thiungs on your cock is parsley, and it smells like skinny parsley chick. I love you blonde skinny parsley on dick chick.

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Romaines

1:34 pm February, 29 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Her bikini is so low Andy Williams dick can’t reach it. Cause it’s got girth like Chock Full’ O Nuts but not necessarily length unkless stretched by Polynessian cock fairies.

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Gimbles

1:39 pm February, 29 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

And if you guys vote for that big eared fake Christian bozo with the tan again you gonna be fucked. Romney/Kroeger 2012.

1:51 pm February, 29 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

There is a lot of real estate on her midriff for saturation DNA bombing.

1:54 pm February, 29 tall guy said...

Thinny Suzy isn’t bad. She’s ruthlessly promoting her best & only asset. Her biggest regret must be that she only hooked silly bloody Coleman, who’s under contract w/- the Grecian company & is a combo carni/stunt double for the ghouls working on the River Caves ride at the amusement park. Piss weak rocker horns too. Which I’m starting to think really is a disturbing new douche trend.

1:56 pm February, 29 Vin Douchal said...

Don’t start with the policitics, Rev. You saw what happened yesterday talking about The Rat Pack.

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Tricky Dicks

2:04 pm February, 29 Eliza Douchecoo said...

I love boobies, she has none, but know what I also love, poon, she appears to be all set with that equipment. As for coon eyes, he can go piss on a transformer…not the cool kind either.

2:06 pm February, 29 Eliza Douchecoo said...

I just googled her, she does in fact have boobies, I’m in love.

2:09 pm February, 29 Et Tu Douche? said...

Her bikini bottom’s so low the little man in the canoe is thinking about making a run for it.

2:39 pm February, 29 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

I think I can see the grain of rice she had for dinner. Three weeks ago.

2:40 pm February, 29 Capt. James T. Douche said...

He enjoys cutting himself she enjoys mojitos with an ipecac sidecar I think this happy couple is gonna make it.

2:42 pm February, 29 Wedgie said...

She’s so skinny you’ll get bone splinters in your dick.

2:44 pm February, 29 Wheezer said...

“Him, ‘Coleman’? You would refer to him as ‘Coleman’? I dare say, ladies and gentlemen, that this assbag is nothing close to resembling ‘Coleman’!”

.

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Denholm Elliots

2:52 pm February, 29 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Coldman? The D is silent.

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Fuckers.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PxDOIoMx5O4

2:53 pm February, 29 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Fuck off youtube. The Birdcage was my 17th favourite gay movie.

3:07 pm February, 29 The Dude said...

Reminds me, I have to send Aunt Rexie a fruitcake. Named Coleman.

3:27 pm February, 29 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

I agree, that’s Starry Blight / King of Sears. He’s just throwing us off wearing a shirt and shit. And it looks like Hello Kitty kicked his sorry ass to the curb once his Discover card maxed out.

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Her bikini bottom is so low it could double as footwear.

3:40 pm February, 29 Choad the Douche Sprocket said...

@Vin Douchal: Her fingers are so long, she can clap while tickling my prostate.

.

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.Goldstein’s

3:46 pm February, 29 Nancy Dreuche said...

Hey, that’s Hello Kitty bleeth’s jumpoff the King of Sears! I guess hes downsizing to a more streamlined model without airbags. Times is still pretty lean for everyone I tells ya.

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From previous threads,

@Doc B. No worries about the new nickname. I’m a fan of anything that makes me sound more powerful than I actually am.

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@McCrudeshoes re: Charlie Sheen and the party scene. Sheen had enough of his own money for copious amounts of drugs and his Hollywood connects for who-ars and the like. It’s not like he needed to pay someone to create that type of ambiance he just did it himself. But your everyday douchebag needs a little help in that area and he pays a substantially smaller amount for a piece of the party lifestyle. Sheens just lucky enough not to have to go through a middleman. A lot of cash can do that for ya.

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@Douchey Wallnuts, please do not hold back on the Rat Pack fan fiction. It only goes to further prove my point. Sometimes I think you guys are actually capable of logical thought and that is when I’m most proud of you.

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Finally, some fucking chick for HOH this week please. This is getting to be regoddamrecockulous.

3:54 pm February, 29 Nancy Dreuche said...

@tall guy, almost forgot to tell you I think that Morissey is a whiney ass bitch. I know I’m supposed to be all googly moogly over dudes who love The Smiths but truth be told I can’t stand their music. Girlfriend in a coma? Well duh, sweet blissful unconsciousness is better than having to listen to that guy mope warble all day. As for The Shins I like his collabo band Broken Bells a lot more.

3:57 pm February, 29 Wheezer said...

Yep, this is indeed King Sharty – the guyliner’d eyes have it.

3:57 pm February, 29 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Her bikini bottom is so low the fish is gonna fall out of the taco. Taco I says!

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Mongers

4:06 pm February, 29 Capt. James T. Douche said...

This guy is a societal hot Karl; emo douche is the bottom of the douche food chain, he’s the sea kelp and detritus of the douche food web.

Ecology

6:30 pm February, 29 tall guy said...

Drueche, I wasn’t aware chicks were supposed to go all googly-moogly over those who enjoy The Smiths. Maybe i’ll tell the German I’m a fan…

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I like The Queen Is Dead + some of Morrissey’s solo work. I will always love Johnny Marr whoever he’s playing with. He’s an odd bird Moz. He encourages obsession from his fans (and I am not obsessed that’s for sure). A strong part of him needs devotion and he seems to understand his followers better than most pop stars because he has tried to make them an extension of his (adolescent) self. His (fairly normal by common standards) childhood seem to be a constant source of sorrowful memories. Wasn’t tactile (w/- his own mother ferchristsakes) yet as a performer revelled/revels in a messianic adulation from his followers almost as if he wants them to invade the stage and smother him in love. He’s a gifted lyricist and a good storyteller. But I also think he’d be a bit too intense for me to hang out with – and I realise the unlikelihood of such a thing.

7:13 pm February, 29 Doucheywallnuts said...

What Dreuche says, I says. Suzy for HOH.

7:45 pm February, 29 Blah said...

Andy Williams?

8:13 pm February, 29 tall guy said...

I don’t think Suze is HoH material, walnuts.

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Just say, I say, just say, I say just sayin’.

8:13 pm February, 29 troy tempest said...

@Nancy:

Girlfriend in a coma? Well duh, sweet blissful unconsciousness is better than having to listen to that guy mope warble all day.

Ummm, I know the people involved. Not Morrissey – he’s in his own weird world of gay something or other.

But here’s the lowdown on the Girl in a Coma. The Girl in a Coma is his friend Linder Sterling. They’ve been close friends for decades. Linder got in a car wreck that damn near killed her. She was hospitalised for quite a while and took months to convalesce. At first things were pretty dodgey – she might not make it, and that’s where the song comes from – his best friend was on death’s door.

Personally, I think Linder is WAY cooler than Morrissey. People talk about Lady Gaga’s meat dress – Linder did that back in the early 80s when she was in the band Ludus. Here’s a link to one of my fave tunes by Ludus – My Cherry’s In Sherry. It’s interesting music – a mix of jazz and punk rock.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rvryKnzZtZE

Now a days she’s a well regarded artist. Here’s an interview with her from the Tate:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZIDjQNhGKak

(Full disclosure – I’m 1 or 2 degrees of separation from Linder – I know people who know her.)

8:32 pm February, 29 Stephanie said...

Affliction = Infection

10:04 pm February, 29 tall guy said...

Righto, I put forth the following verse and ask your thoughts – Douche or Notta?

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“I crawl like a viper

Through these suburban streets

Make love to these women

Languid and bittersweet

I’ll rise when the sun goes down

Cover every game in town

A world of my own

I’ll make it my home sweet home”

– Deacon Blues Steely Dan

10:09 pm February, 29 JustDan said...

Look at the builings bras! It’s like EURO and shit.

Yeah, EURODOUCHE.

10:31 pm February, 29 Bags McDouche said...

If she put some Calamine lotion on them, they would be gone in the morning. That being said, she should be cloned and I want two.

12:17 am March, 1 Colossus of Choads said...

Them’s some small eyes all right.

Moleman (?).

1:39 am March, 1 Nostradouchus said...

The chick needs a burger. That shit is disgusting.

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The dude needs some platform shoes. That shit is hilarious.

7:16 am March, 1 Evilmoose said...

Holy fuck she is hot….the girl in the bikini is too.

I was never into skinny girls until I banged a lifeguard that thin…..a whole lot of fun that was!

8:32 am March, 1 kneejerk said...

I think I love her

10:54 am March, 1 Sergeant Poop said...

Nomination for Hall of Hott?

12:54 pm March, 1 CB Popped said...

Lean to work the saxophone,

I play just what I feel,

Drink Scotch Whiskey all night long,

And die behind the wheel.

God the vintage Steely Dan was so great.

The Royal Scam.

The Cure always had quality clean guitar parts and effects.

9:53 am March, 2 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Always take a spare 6lb watch with you. You never know when your primary will melt down since they generally aren’t designed withstand prolonged Axe exposure.

11:13 pm March, 2 Wedgie said...

That guy’s real name is Byron.

11:14 pm March, 2 Wedgie said...

Byron Monkey Hold, that is. From the country of Gyroscopia.

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