Friday, February 3, 2012

Friday Haiku

Mr. Jay Louis:

What’d I ever do to you?

This is so harsh, man…

Shake it off, DarkSock…

Just pull it together, Man…

*takes a deep breath, then…*

Jill always wanted

A Chaz Bono Shit Golem;

Now what, Jill? Now what???

or

Not sayin’ Jan’s dumb,

But she clearly cannot tell

Douche from Shinola.

As always, your turn

Awaits in comments section;

Lawd have mercy, Y’all…

-D.S.

Friday is a day

Relished for boobies and mock

Today I just wipe

– saulgoode42

Sad Cathy wonders,

If Al Jolson took a shit,

Would it smell this bad?

– hermit

Double Ducky Lips

Ebony and Ivory

Perfect Harmony

– Wedgie

Shoe polish is for

loafers you silly twit. Come

here, mine need a buff.

– Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche

# posted by Bagnonymous
7:19 am February, 3 Troy Tempest said...

Douche or bruthabag?

the corner of his eyebrow

(now gone) reveals DOUCHE.

7:24 am February, 3 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Dyed Brown Diesel Dyke

Looks like Al Jolson hate-fucced

poor Aunt Jemima

7:25 am February, 3 saulgoode42 said...

Friday is a day

Relished for boobies and mock

Today I just wipe

7:26 am February, 3 hermit said...

Sad Cathy wonders,

If Al Jolson took a shit,

Would it smell this bad?

7:26 am February, 3 ehcuodouche said...

What the motherfuck

Jesus Christ my eyes goddamn

Make the hurting stop

7:26 am February, 3 Wedgie said...

Gross lesbo coupling

Has me searching for a name

Uncle Jemima?

7:26 am February, 3 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Public Service Plea:

Do not ever make snowmen

Out of brown snow, please

7:27 am February, 3 Wedgie said...

I truly believe

There’s no one in this picture

Who pees standing up.

7:28 am February, 3 Wedgie said...

Well, it’s nice to see

That even the clambumpers

Have douchebag problems

7:28 am February, 3 Vin Douchal said...

Work place accidents

No laughing matter at the

Tan Bed Tech’s Union

7:29 am February, 3 Wedgie said...

I can’t wait to hear

That fuccen Canadian’s

Take on Mulatta’s

7:31 am February, 3 Wedgie said...

Gulf Coast Architect’s

Design of the Year Award:

Sun-power strap-on.

7:32 am February, 3 Wedgie said...

Double Ducky Lips

Ebony and Ivory

Perfect Harmony

7:33 am February, 3 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Shoe polish is for

loafers you silly twit. Come

here, mine need a buff.

7:33 am February, 3 Douchble Helix said...

Dude & Wedgie in

a tie ftw

great job ‘bag hunters!

7:34 am February, 3 Bag A said...

halloween party

pics don’t belong – no boobies

no hotts, please remove

7:34 am February, 3 Douche Springsteen said...

what the fuck is this?

I’m glad I’m not in Dixie

Minstrel shows aren’t cool

7:34 am February, 3 Wedgie said...

Hey, I have that tie

For about two more minutes

Where’s that can of gas?

7:36 am February, 3 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Mr. Hankey’s son

takes bleeth on hot date. T.P.

mob ends it quickly.

7:37 am February, 3 Douche Springsteen said...

confused Kristen asks

“what’s miscegenation mean?”

Bob sez “I’ll show you”

7:38 am February, 3 saulgoode42 said...

These Looney Tunes look

Happy as a pig in shit

Hey wait, nevermind.

7:41 am February, 3 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

“Look to the cookie”

said Jerry for harmony.

Just dissonance here.

7:43 am February, 3 Colossus of Choads said...

jesus fucking christ.

I got nothing

7:46 am February, 3 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Jan’s jungle fever

was short lived when she found out

Chris has a white root.

7:48 am February, 3 Douche Springsteen said...

Douche Springsteen wonders

does dude look like a lady?

or vice versa? son.

7:49 am February, 3 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Jan loved Springsteen so

much she dug up Clemmon’s corpse.

Now sax not solo.

7:50 am February, 3 Jeff Reed Towel Dispenser said...

Spike Lee’s “Bamboozled”

Combined with “She Hate Me” makes

“Rosemary’s Baby.”

7:53 am February, 3 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

“Look at me, Mammy!

Don’t you know me?” Al’s song

takes on new meaning.

7:55 am February, 3 Douche De Leche said...

Green Stefany likes dirt

Pink lips, white shirt

But gives no love to Fat Albert

8:24 am February, 3 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Now you can all see

My brillo haired Leah is a

Fat Mulatto dude.

8:26 am February, 3 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

She hasn’t shined shoes

Since the gyroscope was put

In her monkey hole.

8:26 am February, 3 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

The Reverend Al

Sharpton has always been a

Sharp nappy dresser.

8:28 am February, 3 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Muhammed Ali

Mourns with his grandbaby girl

Angela Dundee.

8:29 am February, 3 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Gary Coleman finds love

With midget from Latvia.

Whatchu talking bout!

8:30 am February, 3 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

That Flip Wilson was

One funny fucker. Pucker

Up Geraldine. Son!

8:31 am February, 3 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Things haven’t been the

Same for Oprah since Gayle left

For another dude.

8:32 am February, 3 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Avril Lavigne met

This dude last time she did a

Show in Compton.

8:33 am February, 3 SonnyChibaChoad said...

burnt umber tranny

tucks orange crayon of love

bring on minstrel show

8:35 am February, 3 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Blackface proclaims “Me

Chinese, me play joke. Dark Sock

Pee-Pee in your coke.”

8:38 am February, 3 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

That black dude is the

Twin sister of that bug eyed

Dude in Predator.

8:39 am February, 3 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Taken at MLK

Anniversary. New speech

born. “I have a peen.”

8:48 am February, 3 Nancy Dreuche said...

Guess Who’s Coming To

Dinner? Her white girlfriend in

Blackface. Ratings gold.

8:53 am February, 3 I R A Darth Aggie said...

BrothaBag Orange,

For the Loss,

Oh my Eyes!

8:56 am February, 3 Anonymous said...

modern day minstrel?

not just racist: an affront

to all humankind

9:27 am February, 3 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Cecil Fielder’s

Son celebrates move back

Home with grunk and rape.

9:30 am February, 3 FoghornLeghorn said...

We can rest assured

skin tones like this don’t occur

normally on earth.

9:36 am February, 3 Doucheywallnuts said...

Stepin’ Fetchit Douche

Sets the movement back decades

For Douches and Brothers

9:37 am February, 3 Doucheywallnuts said...

Cries of Racism

Will be drowned out by cries of

He’s a fuccen Douche

10:14 am February, 3 Douchble Helix said...

Sober(?) Rev’s pretty

goddam funny, too! Who knew

He’s more’n a racist?

10:42 am February, 3 Choad the Douche Sprocket said...

Orange we happy?

Blackface outlawed in movies

But douchebags were not

10:43 am February, 3 Mr. Biggs said...

Blackface? Spraytan face?

Whiteface? Duckface? Dr Seuss

has a new poem.

11:26 am February, 3 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Fucking Dark Sock is Tardos again. And I’m not fucking sober Douchable Helix are you nuts. Friday is study day. No fucking work Friday, Study day. Getting right drunk and working on my thesis “The Transfer Of Wealth From Hong Kong To Canada Before Chinese Nationalization And It’s Effect On The Stability Of The Condominium Market In Canada From 1990- 2012: A Study In Canadian Interest Rates.” I shit you not. You can only write about shit like this because your wife wants you to get a doctorate to be overqualified to work with her when she opens up her own company if you’re fucking ripped on cheap beer and speed. Son

12:23 pm February, 3 Wedgie said...

^The Right Reverand Chadwick Kroeger…..PhD?

.

Is it just me, or did the universe just tilt a little?

12:39 pm February, 3 Wheezer said...

Jolson wannabe:

“Orange is the new shoeblack”;

same kind of putty.

12:59 pm February, 3 Wheezer said...

Poopi Goldberg views

“tan,” duckface as cool; brunette

chick looks like a Ghost

1:05 pm February, 3 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

@Wedgie

.

I multi-task. When I sleep I work for a call center in Mumbai. Son.

.

I really started this thesis in 1990 but Mrs. Kroeger fucked it up. It may be completed if I don’t go bonkers again.

1:20 pm February, 3 Edith Anne Tarbox of Dripping Springs Tx said...

jesus horny christ

that thing on the right with the face,

looks like a cakewreck

2:56 pm February, 3 ehcuodouche said...

Doctor Redderick

Orange no longer pulls teeth

Teeth jump out on own

5:05 pm February, 3 Wedgie said...

Paging Doctor Socck:

Fuccen slacker; post my shit

Silly architect

5:57 pm February, 3 Stephanie said...

literally shitfaced,I can’t do haiku.

6:10 pm February, 3 Nostradouchus said...

Lips light and skin dark –

How the fuck did he do that?

Seriously, dude.

7:15 pm February, 3 DarkSock said...

rough day guys, sorry

3:33 pm February, 4 Morbo said...

Jill appears worried

as the angry mob grows large

Beatings will ensue

12:43 pm February, 5 Lil' Fartknocker said...

Your eyes don’t betray,

not a douchebag in drag, but

prom night Al Roker

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