Friday, February 10, 2012

Friday Haiku

Better watch out, Girl…

Urinal Lotta Trouble.

I’d pee in her butt.

Hair from a bottle.

Clothes courtesy of the nearest

Tuxedo Junction.

— The Reverend Chad Kroeger



Blow job now finished

She wonders how big a tip

Dickhead’s gonna pay

— Wedgie

Shelly contemplates

Existential dilemma;

Puke in sink or floor?

— hermit

Chad gets a pic of

latest bathroom conquest. She

ponders, “What’s his name?”

— Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche

heroin chic chick

shoots up in the wrong bathroom

douche moves in for kill

— Douche Springsteen

Sheila contemplates

pulling out her black butt plug.

Its a Tad. Too Big.

— Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt

I admire her

still trying to look sexy

in front of piss-holes

— Medusa Oblongata

I hate to be rude

but your bride is a gross skank

get a good lawyer

— Medusa Oblongata

I’ll take “Hairstyles That

Died in the Eighties” for two

hundred, Alex, please.

— UFO Destroyers

He looks plaintively

Into the midde distance

She sees cum on shoes

— McCrude

Bathroom Rondevous

Meat Curtains on Marble Tile

Scrotal Slap Echo

— Doucheywallnuts

The Smell of Stale Balls

Is it From the Urinals?

Or is it Her Breath?

— Doucheywallnuts

Hey baby, I will

Adorn you in pearls and cake

Yes, urinal cakes

— Vin Douchal

Porcelain thrones gleam

not utilized. Both the king

and queen sit to pee.

— army (ret) douche

# posted by Bagnonymous
7:17 am February, 10 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Hair from a bottle.

Clothes courtesy of the nearest

Tuxedo Junction.

7:17 am February, 10 tall guy said...

Two dicks one camera.

Post-modern dilemma.

Shake your own drips.

7:18 am February, 10 Nostradouchus said...

Hey girl, come on in.

I swear to God, sweetie pie,

there’s Botox in here.

7:18 am February, 10 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Her boobs have been loose

Since the gyroscope was put

In her monkey hole.

7:19 am February, 10 Wedgie said...

Well, that’s the first place

Most couples take wedding pics

What’s your problem, Sock?

7:19 am February, 10 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Take thousand monkeys.

Give them all a tuxedo

One will wear it right.

7:21 am February, 10 Wedgie said...

Tranny contemplates

Telling his latest victim

He pees standing too

7:21 am February, 10 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Clothes from Muhammed

The Tailor. Camera from

Local Quckie Mart.

7:22 am February, 10 saulgoode42 said...

Melissa likes kink

Post-it says “out of order”

Points where he can pee

7:22 am February, 10 Evilmoose said...

Sad, between the two of them neither figured out that he peed in the sink instead of the urinals.

7:23 am February, 10 Wedgie said...

Give her a Kleenex

Don’t make her use a finger

To wipe off your cum

7:24 am February, 10 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Wedding surpise. Cock.

Mama always said “Life is

Like a box of penis.”

7:25 am February, 10 Wedgie said...

Blow job now finished

She wonders how big a tip

Dickhead’s gonna pay

7:25 am February, 10 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

“Do you Stanley take

This shemale to be your life

Partner,” “I love her cock”

7:26 am February, 10 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Troys post on last thread

Blew my mind. You must all read it.

I think he’s depressed.

7:28 am February, 10 Wedgie said...

Not sure you should be

Sucking that finger before

Washing your hands, Fred.

7:28 am February, 10 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

The Hangover Three.

Bradley Cooper comes out of

Closet: Bathroom Slam.

7:29 am February, 10 jonezy said...

Lonely whiskey sour

forlornly watches couple

wishing it was urine

7:29 am February, 10 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Tuxedo guy put his

Foot a bit too far into the

Next stall and finds love.

7:30 am February, 10 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

She heard ‘Urals’ date.

Thought of a private jet trip!

Bummed by urinals.

7:31 am February, 10 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Instead of gold she

Gave him the greatest gift of

All. Prostate massage.

7:32 am February, 10 jonezy said...

This is a new ad.

For Geico- she’s so easy,

Cavemen can do her

7:33 am February, 10 hermit said...

Shelly contemplates

Existential dilemma;

Puke in sink or floor?

7:35 am February, 10 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Bradley takes picture

while Bob compares peen sizes.

Fred still under sink.

7:37 am February, 10 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Stall abortion now

over couple poses for

celebration pic.

7:41 am February, 10 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Sheila acts out thoughts.

“Just shoot me in the mouth, Now!”

Next, on Dates Gone Bad.

7:41 am February, 10 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Chad gets a pic of

latest bathroom conquest. She

ponders, “What’s his name?”

7:43 am February, 10 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Still going to high

school proms with bimbos when you’re

35 is weird.

7:45 am February, 10 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

“Is that clam chowder

or your nasty spunk in sink?”

“Shut up and smile bitch!”

7:49 am February, 10 Wedgie said...

You guys are some funny fuccers.

7:50 am February, 10 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

“Is this first picture

of me with clothes on?” thinks Kate.

Douche busy preening.

7:55 am February, 10 Douche Springsteen said...

poor actor works as

Gynochin’s understudy

career’s in toilet

7:57 am February, 10 Douche Springsteen said...

heroin chic chick

shoots up in the wrong bathroom

douche moves in for kill

8:01 am February, 10 ehcuodouche said...

Escorting Blind Bob

Tina’s community service

Sometimes gets wet socks

8:05 am February, 10 ehcuodouche said...

Sorry, too early.

Escorting Blind Bob

Jen’s community service

Sometimes gets wet socks.

8:09 am February, 10 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Sheila contemplates

pulling out her black butt plug.

Its a Tad. Too Big.

8:11 am February, 10 Jo Jo the Douche Faced Boy said...

One can only hope

Arnold busts in with Uzi

Tru Lies toilet scene.

8:16 am February, 10 Jo Jo the Douche Faced Boy said...

“You’ll look like a douche,

I guarantee it” is new

T.V. Suit Guy’s ad.

8:26 am February, 10 Medusa Oblongata said...

They just got married

and now their relationship

is in the shitter

8:27 am February, 10 Medusa Oblongata said...

I admire her

still trying to look sexy

in front of piss-holes

8:29 am February, 10 Medusa Oblongata said...

This year’s Guggenheim

“Still Life With Douche, Bleach Blond Bleeth

And Marcel Duchamp.”

8:31 am February, 10 Medusa Oblongata said...

I hate to be rude

but your bride is a gross skank

get a good lawyer

8:45 am February, 10 UFO Destroyers said...

I’ll take “Hairstyles That

Died in the Eighties” for two

hundred, Alex, please.

8:59 am February, 10 McCrude said...

When it’s really love

Take her to the guys pisser

For a fuck and pics

9:17 am February, 10 McCrude said...

He looks plaintively

Into the midde distance

She sees cum on shoes

.

Incidentally She Sees Cum on Shoes was the working title of STP’s Songs From the Vatican Giftshop.

9:22 am February, 10 Doucheywallnuts said...

Bathroom Rondevous

Meat Curtains on Marble Tile

Scrotal Slap Echo

9:27 am February, 10 Doucheywallnuts said...

The Smell of Stale Balls

Is it From the Urinals?

Or is it Her Breath?

9:29 am February, 10 Vin Douchal said...

Nickelback rider

States “formal wear and hooker”

For BJ swirly

9:29 am February, 10 Doucheywallnuts said...

Taste on Her Finger

She Wonders if it is From

Her Pink or Her Stink?

9:31 am February, 10 Vin Douchal said...

Hey baby, I will

Adorn you in pearls and cake

Yes, urinal cakes

9:33 am February, 10 Vin Douchal said...

Post-it note reminds

To take your Xanax today

No prob we all smoove

9:48 am February, 10 army (ret) douche said...

Porcelain thrones gleam

not utilized. Both the king

and queen sit to pee.

9:57 am February, 10 Southern Scrotic said...

Fergus meets Dil at

the multiplex cinema

Sees “The Crying Game”

10:12 am February, 10 Douchble Helix said...

What a stupid cunt.

Good Lord! That is one dumb cunt.

Can that cunt be real?

10:13 am February, 10 Douchble Helix said...

Does this screwdriver belong to anyone?

10:18 am February, 10 Charles Douchewin said...

The greatest crisis

Of modernity is a

mobius of fail

10:46 am February, 10 Wedgie said...

Vin’s BJ Swirly

For the Win this fine Friday

Vintage Fontana

11:16 am February, 10 creature said...

post fellatio

did toilet seat cover bib

keep stains off Jill’s dress?

11:38 am February, 10 Baron Von Goolo said...

Fetus in the sink

Gives Amber pause to reflect.

Chuck updates facebook.

11:42 am February, 10 Baron Von Goolo said...

Amber contemplates,

Then wishes her finger was

loaded with buckshot.

12:15 pm February, 10 Wheezer said...

Regs brought fuccen MOCK!

Tons of great ones on front page;

kept ‘Sock from meetings…..

12:45 pm February, 10 Medusa Oblongata said...

Wow!Thank you, DarkSock!

Double-Tap on the front page!

Duchamp reference flopped.

9:23 pm February, 10 Blah said...

Travertine tiles

Vegas tart and urinals

Turd in tuxedo.

7:04 am February, 11 Douchble Helix said...

I just uploaded this pic to facebook with the following:

.

Happy Valentines Day from the whole crew at Hot Chicks with Douchebags !!! Jay Louis, proprietor.

.

[I used the large version of the pic, and I shared with both of the fb pages]

2:20 pm February, 13 Justin Ross Lee said...

Hi, I’m the “douche-bag”.

And this photo was JUST the beginning…

http://www.justinrosslee.com

Leave a Reply

What is 2 + 10 ?
Please leave these two fields as-is:
IMPORTANT! To be able to proceed, you need to solve the following simple math (so we know that you are a human) :-)