Thursday, March 8, 2012

Brandeis Rachel Dates a Masshole

Updates a little slower this week, as your scruffly narrator is traveling on bidness.

Doing bidness.

And by bidness, I mean business.

But I like to talk all hip so the kids’ll think I know what’s up.

Justin Bieber is phat! That’s phat with a “Ph.” Phat. Not fat.

Crap.

Gettin’ older.

But I still see you Sexy Semitic Rachel. Ditch the Masshole in the douchatard, stat. For the Brandeis Salad Years won’t last forever.

# posted by douchebag1
7:35 am March, 8 Et Tu Douche? said...

Loves me some Brandeis naughtiness. The pseudo brass knuckles & spiked wrist band thingy is plus

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@Rev Chad

In case you’re wondering Brandeis is 4 year higher learning institution outside of the home of last years Stanley Cup Champions that has always tended to have bored, entitled, naughty Semitic hotts running around. They give BU girls a definite run for their money.

7:54 am March, 8 DarkSock said...

Will Ferrell called; he wants his curly black-dude-style chest hair back.

8:20 am March, 8 Et Tu Douche? said...

Speaking of body hair note the patch of hair he’s got going in his left arm fold. That’s hairier then Plinkys Moms sneeatch.

8:26 am March, 8 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Do I detect Brandeis eye of paid to party?

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Dear Masshole, telling people you are Paul Giamatti has never gotten anyone laid. Ever. Not even Paul Giamatti.

8:29 am March, 8 Nancy Dreuche said...

Double ButtChin? Now I’ve seen it all. Curve your brim Bab, before I pahk your cah up ya ass.

8:34 am March, 8 Medusa Oblongata said...

@ND–BWAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ^

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This photo is quite unsettling. I can’t tell if he’s about to vomit, or if I am.

8:59 am March, 8 Douchble Helix said...

Funny, she doesn’t look Jewish.

9:15 am March, 8 army (ret) douche said...

it’s a good thing i viewed this on an empty stomach. all i wanted to know who won the weekly and instead walked into this! too much too early, boss…

9:18 am March, 8 tall guy said...

Sheesh! What an hideous Orangutan. She looks really comfortable as well.

9:28 am March, 8 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

@Et Tu

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Thank you for the clarification. I would have loved me some Brandeis before I got hooked up with the current Ashkenazi. The one above appears to be Sephardi. Correct me if I am wrong anyone. And by wrong I mean nasty 20 year itch wet spot in my shorts. Hibiscus is this years khaki.

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Go Leafs? Canadians? Ottawa? Fuck it I’m watching Jew porn.

9:31 am March, 8 Charles Nelson Douchely said...

Masshole needs some chinderwear.

10:10 am March, 8 tall guy said...

Ham notwithstanding, he actually looks like he’s eaten too much deep fried food. I love the smell of butter caramelising, or of duck fat sizzling over baking potatoes, but cottonseed oil? No thank you. There are times when you have to draw the line. I can think of no deep fried dish, with the exception of tempura, that the world would not benefit from its absence. Although the deep fried Mars bar is a brilliant piece of satire.

10:22 am March, 8 Kip Largefish said...

Looks like I picked the wrong week to shave Will Farrel’s chest.

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Glue

10:41 am March, 8 Nancy Dreuche said...

This douche definitely is a ham hater. I can tell by the way he holds his girl drink. I’ve been seriously thinking of quitting my current job as online detective to the stars and maybe get a job working for hAmWay. Possible being surrounded by such salty delacasie 24-7 will curb my cravings for it. And selling meat door to door can’t be that hard, right?

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Hamsterdam Red-Light Roxannes

10:43 am March, 8 jonezy said...

I never did think of a good reason why that Mexican chick was in all those 80s Schwarzenegger movies. She wasn’t all that hot- she didn’t speak English all that well – and she hung around d-bags like this and Buzzsaw.

10:43 am March, 8 Nancy Dreuche said...

Also I forgot to mention that this turds hat is missing a T between the S and D.

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Spellcheckers

10:53 am March, 8 Bags McDouche said...

She looks like she’s barely tolerating the hot water bottle wrapped around her, and might be thinking “this better not show-up online.”

10:54 am March, 8 Capt. James T. Douche said...

That motherfucker looks like my childhood orthodontist minus the tat and chest pubes!

11:00 am March, 8 Brian said...

My orthodontist never took his shirt off while he worked on my teeth.

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Just his pants.

2:55 pm March, 8 Stephanie said...

That guy should stay home and buy a body shaver and mirror. She needs a pair of glasses stat.

3:17 pm March, 8 DixieRecht said...

Check out his nasty neck tatt. What does it say??

3:50 pm March, 8 Nostradouchus said...

Showing that much chest hair alone is auto.

7:44 pm March, 8 ehcuodouche said...

This guy is pretty straightforward. Get a good head of steam going as you walk up to him and unleash a straight right. He should fly right out of his chest hair and through the plate glass window in the back. Order whatever she’s having and make sure you get a clean bar towel to wipe of any flopsweat he left behind.

10:35 pm March, 8 Blah said...

Does his chest tatt say “All Shits Mast”?

2:47 am March, 9 Lady Godiva's Piebald said...

i’d tenga her fliphole.

him, i would beat off with napalm.

nerfherders

7:00 pm March, 9 Stephanie said...

I think I saw this guy at a Ham Radio Club meeting.

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