Monday, March 26, 2012

HCwDB of the Week: Sleepy Jerkenstein and Cindy

There was no doubt which toxic cohabit was enough to flyswat an innocent Northwestern Tree Badger in the gonadal region.

Sleepy Jerkenstein not only wants to share trivial facts with you, as tattooed on his eyelds, but he pollutes the purity of bongo thigh cuddle that is a phantasmic bikini clad imagined Cindy who giggles in the pool and then climbs out and says, “Hi Brad… you know how cute I always thought you were.”

As Wheezer so astutely pointed out in the comments thread, Sleepy Jerkenstein and Cindy also contributing to this future award winning HCwDB artwork, “Innocence and Poo Face.”

That being said, The Unholy Pear Fondle is an HCwDB award winning collision of image detritus in its own right. In a normal week, it would’ve won (lost). But not against Sleepy J.

Other pics of note, Vazquez and the Pear, Tony Cappacino’s oldbaggery, The Lion, The Witch and the Fung, and our discussion of the Pabst Blue Ribbon Herpster Complex.

But there was no taking down the Sleepy and the Cindy. Awful, awful wrongness.

Your humble narrator flies back to smoggy Los Angeles on cheap party bus limo airline, Virgin America.

# posted by douchebag1
6:33 am March, 26 I R A Darth Aggie said...

Might as well give him the Yearly. He’ll be hard to beat.

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Actually, he can be beaten. But you’ll get bits of douchebag on you, and ewww…

6:57 am March, 26 Douche Springsteen said...

In this photo Sleepy, as with his general demeanor, Sleepy is saying to the world “Hey man, pull my finger”. For that, he deserves our collective mock. And Cindy deserves our awkward, lingering glances at the coffee shop until she packs up her laptop and moves to another table.

7:00 am March, 26 Et Tu Douche? said...

How great would it be if Northwestern Tree Badger came darting through the curtains immediately behind Slappy and doing as rabid badgers do start gnawing at his jugular? It wouldn’t wouldn’t be great cause I got’s respect for badgers, except for Bucky he’s an AHole, and the thought of NTB getting ink poisoning and more then likely Hep C would make me sad, sad I says.

7:03 am March, 26 Choad the Douche Sprocket said...

Yes, the stench of choad is strong, and the douche/chick dialectic hard to excuse…or fathom…in this bizarre coupling.

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I’m with @I R A – Sleepy may win the yearly in a drowsy-eyed walkover.

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.City can walk on my back (awake or asleep from the roofies I’ve plied her with) any day.

7:06 am March, 26 Choad the Douche Sprocket said...

….that would be “Cindy” — “City” being the name of the last streetwalker I paid for a toothless bj on East Fremont Street..

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.$40….not a bad deal…and highly underrated.

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Underrated I says.

7:28 am March, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Oh.. Phoebe Cates ye little kosher morsel of sex kitten at the Klein family seder the week. What joy ye gave to me as I walked out of the theatre with a double boner which drew that whore Tami’s eyes to my crotch and led her to undo my pants in my parents wood-panelled basement with the green shag rug with nicotine-stained ceiling tiles and give me the hand job that only an Italian Phoebe Cates look alike can give to a seventeen year old boy. You and she who would later be the only one to break my black heart combined to make me shoot a load as fast as a Jewish-named man in a gated community in Florida shoots at youth armed with hoodie and skittles.

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Too soon?

7:58 am March, 26 Choad the Douche Sprocket said...

@Rev Chad: I’ve decided to wear a hoodie all day in honor of your comment.

7:59 am March, 26 The Dude said...

I wonder if Jim Cameron found any douchebags at the bottom of the sea.

8:54 am March, 26 Vin Douchal said...

Maybe I’m off base here, but in what fucking galaxy could this guy expect to be taken seriously? I really don’t give a shit what his talent is, I’m out a nano-second after looking at him.

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What a warthog. Warthog, I says

9:22 am March, 26 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

@Vin

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I’d hire him as a hit man if I needed a hit man and he was a hit man.

9:35 am March, 26 Douche of Hazard said...

Sleepy must be pretty brave to get eyelid tatoos. Fuck God is a pretty strong statement to put on your face.

I’m giving him a notta.

9:37 am March, 26 Douche of Hazard said...

Just joking. Just joking, I says.

10:02 am March, 26 Doucheywallnuts said...

The “pull my finger pose”/ “smell my finger pose” is the pose of the year for douchebags.

10:55 am March, 26 tall guy said...

Yo! Astute or otherwise, I was first to point out Sleepy was a repeat offender. Yo!

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Yo! I say.

11:48 am March, 26 Baron Von Goolo said...

I haven’t seen a train wreck like this since the George Of The Jungle title sequence.

12:54 pm March, 26 FoghornLeghorn said...

I think his face tattoo reads “Taco God”. He got it shortly after being promoted to his current position as Junior Assistant Night Manager at the Taco-Burrito King down the street from me.

10:12 pm March, 26 Nostradouchus said...

Fred Durst’s little brother finally won something….

11:43 pm March, 26 Jacques Doucheteau said...

“Tugs Cod”? I believe it.

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