Thursday, March 8, 2012

Oldbag Harold Wears Pants On His Head

Clarissa prays the inheritence won’t be blown on Cialis and Depends.

# posted by douchebag1
1:26 pm March, 8 Douchble Helix said...

A jeans shorts Pope hat?!?!

1:31 pm March, 8 Bag A said...

Milfalicious!

1:38 pm March, 8 Nancy Dreuche said...

All Day I Dream About Scrote?

1:40 pm March, 8 Nancy Dreuche said...

Yes, wearing a five year old girls skort on your head as a hat isn’t creepy at all. But pairing it with a Fred Flinstone cheetah vest definitely is.

1:53 pm March, 8 Vin Douchal said...

You may think that’s a bar and glasses of wine and those are straws in front, but that’s actually the San Bernardino Country Personel Office and those are pens and margaritas in front of the two final candidates vying for the Comptroller opening.

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You should see the Behavioral Health Department, now that’s a fuccen party

2:01 pm March, 8 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Worse than the hat is that he’s wearing my Aunt Sue’s leopard print blouse. Wearing, I says.

2:05 pm March, 8 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

This may be weird buit this picture reminds me of all the dog shit under the rapidly melting snow up here comingled with the image of a transplanetary ghost version of Whitney Houston chasing my cock through forest and glade in her sweet brown leather jacket and tight jeans singing I’ll be Chad’s baby tonight.

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Now that was some fine Mulatto.

2:13 pm March, 8 Claude Douchenbagger said...

If he unbuttons the fly on his hat does his wang pop out?

2:15 pm March, 8 Choad the Douche Sprocket said...

DB1 seems to be taking it to a whole new level today.

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.As does Adidas with Mitre Myron – King of the Sun City Chablis Sipping Club — its new spokesperson and all.

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.Myron, like all oldbags, knows the way to a MILF’s semi-lubricated love canal is through a few well placed, roofie-coated ice cubes in her Franzia.

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Oenophiles

2:32 pm March, 8 Nancy Dreuche said...

Maybe he literally is a dickhead and this is the best solution to accommodate the penis and balls growing out of his forehead. Geez guys, way to discriminate once again.

2:35 pm March, 8 Et Tu Douche? said...

Wow!! Oldbaggery just never ceases to amaze me and by amaze me I mean cringe.

2:38 pm March, 8 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

The farewell party for pedobear’s father resulted in quite a few bittersweet memories for Cook county’s registered sex offender program. Melanie was able to re-unite with her father one last time before he was going to be sent into gen pop where the guards knew the problem would be dealt with swiftly. But on the other hand, all the prepubescent girls would lose a beloved father figure that would always make sure the were on the proper road to bleethdom by personally checking the height of their skirts and spanking them if it was too long.

2:40 pm March, 8 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

I gotta say, this is the first pic on here that has really creeped me out.

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Hinky

2:48 pm March, 8 Stephanie said...

Not only is he wearing skorts on his head,but also looks like a pair of underwear because the label is sticking out.

You know you’re old when you’re pairing the wrong clothes together. Pretty soon his family will take away his car keys and no more of that online dating girls that are his granddaughter’s age.

2:55 pm March, 8 Nancy Dreuche said...

@Stephanie, great now I feel bad because this dude has dementia and is probably wearing a fedora on his schlongora and he combs his ball into a handle bar mustache.

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Douchezeimers Disease

3:00 pm March, 8 Stephanie said...

I’m pretty sure his balls are elongated and dragging somewhere picking up lint and stuff.

3:02 pm March, 8 Medusa Oblongata said...

Pope Donkius IV

3:20 pm March, 8 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Pope Harold has early onset Arseheimer’s syndrome. And I’m pretty sure he just peed in one of hose glasses.

3:54 pm March, 8 Nostradouchus said...

Harold took the Wiz Khalifa song “Black and Yellow” a little too seriously…

4:52 pm March, 8 melvil_duchi said...

he is wearing whitewine goggles

4:53 pm March, 8 melvil_duchi said...

seeing the world through pisscolored glasses

5:38 pm March, 8 troy tempest said...

Normally I give oldbags a pass – if you’re older and getting some young tail, more power to you. But this guy? Man, he’s like dementia city. He probably plays with his poop while singing songs by the Carpenters. This is actually kind of a really sad photo. I think this is Guggenheim material. Last year was pretty weak for Guggenheim material. So far, this year is pretty good.

7:32 pm March, 8 CK said...

That rhymes!

8:20 pm March, 8 T said...

Tobias Funke wants his jorts back.

8:44 pm March, 8 Geoffrey said...

dude

8:53 pm March, 8 Anonymous said...

What’s Cornelius from Planet of the Apes doing with cut-off jeans (or a denim skirt) on the top of his head?

10:26 pm March, 8 Blah said...

The fact that this guy actually got a date while wearing jorts on his head makes me realize that there is no God.

10:54 pm March, 8 tall guy said...

There is no way on God’s Earth that this guy could ever get a notta pass! C’mon fellows!

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Sprocket, I was a great fucking sommelier. Great, I tell you. Alas, those days are behind me. And by the way, no sommelier who’s any good could ever be under 30yo. Most definitely, boyo! Not a mature enough palette. Not by a long shot.

12:27 am March, 9 ehcuodouche said...

No special douchepunching skills necessary here. First, move the wine glasses to a safe location. Then pull Oldbags pantscap over his head, push him to the floor, and hit him with the table so the legs detach easily. Next, beat him with the table legs. Finally, drink the wine you saved earlier. It’s probably fucking Chardonnay, but since you just beat a guy who wears pants on his head to death with a table leg, you really need a wine that goes with anything.

2:50 am March, 9 Lady Godiva's Piebald said...

worst. muffintop. ever.

4:13 am March, 9 Capt. James T. Douche said...

The Orange Pope of Douchery rises!

4:30 am March, 9 Anonymous said...

There is another German. From another group. First up, I don’t like this German. But I think she likes me. She makes the other German look like a choirgirl. How so? Two words: Boob tatts. Boob tatts, I tell you! Imagine it if you will. Fucking boob tatts.

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I don’t want this German.

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The End.

4:33 am March, 9 tall guy said...

ps the above is me.

6:42 am March, 9 Nancy Dreuche said...

@tall guy, hit it from behind unless she has a tramp stamp. If she has a tramp stamp hit it from behind with the lights dimmed. All Germans sound the same in the dark. Historical Fact. Now go gettum!

7:51 am March, 9 Anonymous said...

Mickey Rourke took a dump in his jean shorts, and turned them upside down for all to see

8:11 am March, 9 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

It’s the trousers Gromit! They’ve gone all wrong!

8:13 am March, 9 I R A Darth Aggie said...

Will no one rid me of this turbulent priest?

8:35 am March, 9 DarkSock said...

When he was doing time in County for bad checks Harold would put on these jeans, stand on his head, and earn cartons of Marlboro Reds the hard way.

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Prison Pussies.

8:39 am March, 9 DarkSock said...

Remo Williams – The Adventure Declines
afsd
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Let’s see who gets that one, besides Baron Von Goolo.

8:44 am March, 9 DarkSock said...

Robert Forster spent half of his pay from Tarantino’s “Jackie Brown” on
horse races, booze and slutty younger women.
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But sadly he squandered the rest.
ewewe

8:55 am March, 9 Et Tu Douche? said...

T @ 8:20 pm Said:

“Tobias Funke wants his jorts back.”

Great call, I’m still chuckling. David Cross rules!!!

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Analrapist’s

5:54 pm March, 9 Medusa Oblongata said...

@ Sock 9:30–I saw the first one in the theater with my dad. I still couldn’t tell you a thing about that piece of crap movie, I think I fell asleep.

6:47 pm March, 9 CB Popped said...

I see an Oldbag for the year contender.

6:55 pm March, 9 Stephanie said...

I’d love to hear his wisdom on how he puts together his outfits to score chicks with.

8:06 pm March, 9 Little Willie said...

That chick has some issues being seen, let alone hanging out, with some asshole wearing a pair of fucking shorts on his head. The asshole thinks he looks trendy or something. No, you look like an asshole fuckhead.

2:36 pm March, 11 Bones Molloy said...

The are some many wrong things about this image that I wouldn’t know where to start.

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