Saturday, April 21, 2012

Comment of the Week: Mr. Scrotato Head

Mr. Scrotato Head ponders the high crimes of cornrows in the A Crime is About to be Committed Thread and wins the coveted HCwDB Comment of the Week:

—————-

That’s the same look he gives you when you tell him the Chili’s signature spinach dip is cold.

.

God! Why does life keep kicking him in the nuts?! He’s good looking. He works out. He pours his paychecks into fine clothes and clubbing. Sure, he’s two months behind on his Nissan payments. Sure, he’s using one credit card to pay off the other. Sure, he only made it through half a semester at Santa Clara Community college, but seriously, introductory math is hard! Sure, it burns when he pees and the explosive diarrhea makes him dizzy. And sure, having to move back in with mom and the step douche is no fun, but his roommates could only give him so many passes on the rent.

.

Maybe, just maybe, if he puts his hair in corn rows, things will change. YEAH! That’s it! ‘Cuz nothing stops the nut busting better than winning some hot strange while the collections calls pile up in voicemail.

——-

# posted by douchebag1
12:10 pm April, 21 Jeet Kune Douche said...

This pic makes me wonder: when the world ends on December 21, 2012, will the event be heralded by the coming of a titanic figure in Mayan hieroglyph covered Ed Hardy wear, chin pubes and massive bling – a being who calls himself The Great Douche?

It Will Be A Day Of Terror……..

12:23 pm April, 21 Vin Douchal said...

I want to win the lottery so I can buy a Gulfstream, hunt down the douchebags in these photos and fly Don Rickles to them to read Mr Scrotato Head’s scathing trueisms word for word-face to face as my posse of giant schvugees protects us from repercussions. Schvugees, I says

12:49 pm April, 21 Wheezer said...

Fuccen-A, Scrotato! That was sheer brilliance, man!

1:19 pm April, 21 The Dude said...

Thank god you dint give COTW to Elmore Leonard a.k.a Wallnuts again. Even though he had at least two viable entries.

.

Beer shrilliance, Scrotato Head!

1:21 pm April, 21 The Dude said...

btw, they named it Happy Hour in honor of the giggirls in this pic.

1:31 pm April, 21 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Scrotato Head is a thespian amongst Mormons. A torpedo against lesbians. A turgid guided missile against all of femanity. A homie to his brothas. And the best damn HR guy in the four corners. Bravo you Don Rickle looking bastard.

.

Stoned

2:30 pm April, 21 hermit said...

The slut on the left has been practicing her oral skills on a diesel bus exhaust.

.

.

And Scrotato just described my life, except for the good looking, working out, clubbing, community college and fine clothes part.

.

2:32 pm April, 21 hermit said...

Life kicking me in the nuts and the explosive diarrhea part is dead on.

3:01 pm April, 21 Nancy Dreuche said...

I always wondered what the thought process was when a white dude gets cornrows. Nice work Scrotato.

.

Dark skinned douche in the pic is doing it wrong. When you lick between your fingers you cover more surface area when you roll your tongue up like a tongue taco. Der.

4:11 pm April, 21 Douchble Helix said...

Co-opted by Hermit. Well done, MSH.

4:53 pm April, 21 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Dude cunnelinging his fingers has no idea how a lady zipper is put together. Sucks. For his sister.

.

Nice job Scrot!

5:04 pm April, 21 The Dude said...

Tongue Taco FTW. Der. -euche!

5:30 pm April, 21 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Dreuche giving directions. Total cunnelingrate.

6:15 pm April, 21 Nancy Dreuche said...

@McCrudeshoes, I only give directions to those who desperately need it. Like that dude. I’m sure you need little to no guidance what with your 900+ hours of instructional porn viewing. Am I in the ballpark with that number?

7:15 pm April, 21 The Dude said...

Who invented the term ‘explosive diarrhea’ and why can’t I unthink it?

7:16 pm April, 21 The Dude said...

Cunnelingsanity

7:24 pm April, 21 Doucheywallnuts said...

Cunnilingsterbate

7:26 pm April, 21 Doucheywallnuts said...

I don’t think there could be a better crafted passage to sum up the reality that is the life of these club douches. Bravo Mr. Scrotato Head, we love you!

7:27 pm April, 21 Doucheywallnuts said...

@Dude

http://www.explosivediarrhea.org/

7:31 pm April, 21 Doucheywallnuts said...

7:34 pm April, 21 Doucheywallnuts said...

Douchebags get ED, too.

.

8:05 pm April, 21 The Dude said...

Thank you very little, DW. Now, can I rethink the good parts of life?

There, that’s better!

8:05 pm April, 21 The Dude said...

🙂

8:38 pm April, 21 The Dude said...

And, why can’t I unthink the concept of explosive diarrhea? And, why do I ALWAYS spell it correctly?!?? faaaccck!!!!!!!!!!

.

The Chairman had an ‘episode’ of E.D. one time at the Stardust. They cleared the Bacarrat room as a consequence.

.

Splinters

9:03 pm April, 21 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

@dreuche I’d call it more recreational than instructional. And that number is ridiculously low.

1:11 am April, 22 The Dude said...

4:10 am April, 22 hermit said...

“That’s the same look he gives you when you tell him the Chili’s signature spinach dip is cold.”

.

.

Click on the original pic, read that line, and try not to laugh.

7:07 am April, 22 Et Tu Douche? said...

Mr Scrotato Head is the man!!!! and his prose is genius for all you lurkers or non regs I suggest you go back in the archives and read some of his ode’s to the legend that is J.L. Here’s one to whet your appetite.

J.L.

12:29 pm April, 22 CB Popped said...

After reading that – all I can say is…

SON!

3:08 am April, 25 Nostradouchus said...

I have never done my hand like that when I tossed salad. Fact.

Leave a Reply

What is 4 + 10 ?
Please leave these two fields as-is:
IMPORTANT! To be able to proceed, you need to solve the following simple math (so we know that you are a human) :-)